( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪♪
>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY!
WE'RE BACK HERE WITH AMERICA'S SWEETHEART, MR. JOHN LITHGOW.
YOU HAVE A NEW BOOK OF POETRY.
I ALWAYS LOVE IT WHEN YOU COME ON THE SHARE YOUR POEMS WITH US.
( APPLAUSE ) THE NEW BOOK IS CALLED "A
CONFEDERACY OF DUMPTYS, FOR TRAITSZ OF AMERICAN SCOUNDRELS
IN VERSE WHICH FOCUSES ON HISTORICAL VILLAINS.
>> YES.
>> Stephen: YOU TALKED ABOUT OUR MODERN RECENT DUMPTY WHO
LEFT OFFICE IN JANUARY IN YOUR PREVIOUS POEMS.
WHAT'S IT LIKE DEPARTING FROM MODERN AND TALKING ABOUT
HISTORICAL SCOUNDRELS?
>> IT WAS KIND OF RELIEF.
IT WAS A MOMENT OF GREAT RELIEF THE LAST ELECTION FOR ME AND FOR
ABOUT HALF THE COUNTRY, AND I -- ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: MORE THAN THANKFUL.
MORE THAN THANKFUL.
>> I WAS TRYING TO BE JUDICIOUS.
>> Stephen: YES.
THIS IS A THIRD IN A DRILLING.
I'VE COME TO INTRODUCE BOTH OF THE OTHER BOOKS ON THIS SHOW.
>> Stephen: AND WE ARE HONORED.
>> YOU MADE BOTH OF THEM "TIMES" BEST SELLERS AND MY PUBLISHERS,
OF COURSE, WANTED ANOTHER ONE.
I WAS TO TIRED OF THE SUBJECT, BUT IT WAS A BREAKTHROUGH TO
SUDDENLY THINK, WELL, WAIT A MINUTE, WHAT IF I DISPOSE OF
THAT SUBJECT AND GO BACK IN HISTORY AND HAVE A LOOK AT ALL
OF HIS PRECURSORS.
MY WIFE HAD A LOT TO DO WITH THIS.
SHE'S A HISTORY PROFESSOR HERSELF.
>> Stephen: OH, WOW.
O I WENT AND SORT OF GATHERED UP ALL THESE MARVELOUS
KNOWN AND UNKNOWN CHARACTERS FROM THE 19th AND 20
20th CENTURY WHO HAVE STARTLING PARALLELS AND
RESONANCES WITH OUR CURRENT POLITICAL CLIMATE.
>> Stephen: YOU'VE GRACED US WITH SOME TRAUMATIC READINGS IN
THE PAST ON THE SHOW.
WOULD YOU BE WILLING TO GIVE US A LILT TASTE TONIGHT FOR THE
GOOD PEOPLE OF -- >> YES, I WOULD.
>> Stephen: PLEASE.
IT'S A PERFORMANCE.
>> Stephen: PLEASE.
I WILL TAKE THE STAGE.
>> Stephen: PLEASE DO.
OKAY.
>> Stephen: JOHN LITHGOW, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: A DRAMATIC
INTERPRETATION.
>> YES.
THE BOOK IS A KIND OF HISTORY, IT'S A KIND OF CHRONOLOGY THAT
LEADS US UP TO THE PRESENT DAY, SO THESE ARE VERY CLOSE TO THE
END.
I WILL READ YOU FOUR OR FIVE LIMERICKS, MOST OF THEM ARE VERY
BUT NOT THESE.
THEY'RE CALLED LIMERICKS FOR THE HERE AND NOW.
UNTIL NOW, WE HAVE DWELT ON THE PAST
BUT BEFORE WE ARRIVE AT THE LAST HERE'S A DOZEN QUICK TAKES
ABOUT RASCALS AND RAKES FROM OUR REPROBATE PRESENT-DAY
CAST.
TED CRUZ -- ( LAUGHTER )
-- THAT LARDACEOUS BABOON
IS THE MAESTRO OF INOPPORTUNE.
WITH HIS STATE IN DEEP FREEZE THIS TITAN OF SLEAZE
TOOK HIS FAMILY OFF TO CANCUN.
( APPLAUSE ) GIULIANI, A FREAK AMONG FREAKS,
TENDS TO BLUNDER WHENEVER HE SPEAKS.
BUT HIS CLUMSIEST MESS WAS IN FRONT OF THE PRESS:
JUST FOR MEN TRICKLED DOWN BOTH HIS CHEEKS.
JOEL GREENBERG AND BUDDY MATT GAETZ
SHARE SEVERAL LIBIDINOUS TRAITS.
WHEN BOTH OF THEM SCORE THEY TEND TO IGNORE
THE AGE OF CONSENT OF THEIR MATES.
( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )
EACH MCCONNEL POLITICAL ACT HAS A PHYSIOLOGICAL IMPACT.
FOR MITCH, LEGISLATION CONNOTES CONSTIPATION
OF THE NATION'S INTESTINAL TRACT.
( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )
( CHEERING ) EMPTY FROM THESE VERSES, YOU
MIGHT BE INCLINED TO CONSIDER EACH TARGET
MALIGNED.
BUT COMPARED TO THEIR SMEARS OF THE RECENT FEW YEARS
MY WORDS HAVE BEEN OVERLY KIND.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: HIS BOOK, MY
CONFEDERACY OF DUMPTYS, JOHN LITHGOW, EVERYBODY!
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH A PERFORMANCE BY THEO CROKER AND
WYCLEF JEAN.
AND JON BATISTE.
THANK YOU, MAESTRO.