- Hey guys, thinking of giving the boo the boot.
- [Karlous] This is the perfect show for you!
- [Vena] Each one of these couples think that one of them
is going on a date with one of us.
- [Man] But with the other one will be watching
and calling the shots from a secret location.
- [Man] At the end of the date, we're gonna grade them
and let em' know if they're relationship material or naw.
- Man!
- I would say dash.
- Ladies and gentlemen this is
- [Collectively] Smash or dash!
- [Vena] Okurr
- On this episode, we have Diana,
who has been seeing Anthony.
Is he just temporary or could he be the one.
- Who do we have the pleasure of sitting here with?
- I'm Diana, I'm from Jersey, I been talking to this dude,
just still really haven't made things official,
just like kinda confused like what's going on.
- It's rocky right now.
- Yeah.
- What's the sex like?
- Literally my favorite thing in the world,
but I just want him to be like way more aggressive.
- Hold my hand, show me how aggressive.
- That's what I want and right now its like this
(collectively) Whoa!
- Wow.
- I've never hooked up with a girl, but I'm at that point
in my life where I'm just like what's it like.
- Let me tell you - Ah it's amazing.
- It is dope, it is dope.
- That's something that I don't know if I'm
comfortable talking to him about.
- Okay, and then you have some type
of fear of him being unfaithful.
- Yeah, that's the thing.
When we're at parties and stuff, I'll be like hanging out
with my friends and I'll be looking around for him
and we'll make eye contact and he'll just walk away.
- He ashamed, something going on.
- Something, something going on, yeah.
- So look, we gon send Maddy on a date with Anthony.
- Is that okay with you?
- Yes, you're hot so
- She is hot.
(collective commotion)
- Literally!
- What if you and Anthony and Maddy get it on
- Ahh!
- I'll go crazy.
(light hip hop music)
- Oh he's cute.
- Yeah he's cute.
- That dude is definitely not 21.
- What's he looking like, 34?
- He lookin' like an adult Prince Michael Jackson.
(laughs)
- Hi.
- Anthony, nice to meet you.
- That's a long hug.
- Keep going Maddy.
(laughs)
- How you doing?
- I'm good, let's sit down.
- So, tell me about yourself.
- Well.
- Well (laughs)
- Currently a student at William Patterson.
- I love students.
You have really nice hands.
- Oh thank you.
- Yeah. - Thank you.
- Can you be a little sexier?
- Ah damn, I'll try.
- Can you be a little sexier (laughs)
- What do you do?
- Well I just like to have fun
- Yeah.
- With my girls, go out and kiss and stuff, the usual.
- Hey guys.
- How you doing.
- I'm Hannah, I'm going to be your server today.
- Maddy, flirt with Hannah.
- Thanks Hannah.
- Yeah, how are you?
- I'm good, your eyes are beautiful.
- Oh thank you.
- What the heck is going on in there.
This is Anthony, by the way.
- Hi.
He's so (bleep) cute.
- Yeah he is cute.
- Give him another compliment Hannah.
- I like your chin.
- Oh thank you.
- I like his chin too.
- You have very nice teeth.
- Thank you I just got invisalign.
- Let's get a couple drinks, what you feeling Anth?
Tony? Does anyone call you Tony?
- No, not many people actually.
- Sexy Tony.
Sexy tony.
We'll go with Tony.
- Okay cool.
- I like it.
- Bring him a sexy Tony Hannah.
- We actually do have a sexy Tony.
- That's a thing?
- It's really big.
- I'll take a cocktail, extra large.
- Okay great, so I'm gonna go get those ready
and I'll be back.
(laughs)
- Oh my god she's so pretty.
- Just beautiful.
- You like blondes? - Yeah.
- He's into it, that's his favorite.
- So what's your current situation, tell me everything.
- Current? I currently almost have a girlfriend.
- You said almost too.
So y'all on the same page.
- Do you guys have crazy sex?
- It's, yeah.
- He's unsure.
- It's not too kinky or anything.
- Okay, you don't sound very passionate.
- No?
- When I talk about sex, I wanna hear like
fire coming out of your mouth.
- Oh wow, I um.
- Show me on your hand how aggressive you are.
- I'm not like - See I'm not
Is your hand even touching me.
I literally just felt nothing.
- It's not
- No, no you're still not touching me.
- Call him a lil bitch.
- You're a little bitch.
- Yeah, I am.
- You ever do like a threesome or anything?
- Of course. - Really?
- Yeah.
- Oh, see he said that easy
- He said of course, straight to it.
- Yeah, he's down, he's about it.
- Now you got an answer.
- I hear a Hannah.
Oh my god.
- We have one big Tony.
- One big Tony (laughs)
- That is a big Tony.
- Thick.
- Thick, yeah.
- Don't choke.
(laughs)
- Tony.
Oh my god, did you see that tongue?
- How long is your tongue Tony?
- Let me see your tongue again.
(inaudible)
Come on stick it out.
- Oh my god, holy (beep)
(laughs)
I'm getting tipsy and you know what happens when I'm tipsy?
- What?
- I get super horny.
(laughs)
- Oh my god pickles.
Pickles literally make me horny.
- Oh man.
- Tony, watch.
- I'm watching.
- Oh my.
- Oh!
- Hannah baby.
- That's how you do it.
That's how you do it.
- I'm literally like, I wanna put this like on my face,
you know what I mean?
- Tell Tony to put that meat on your face.
- Tony, put that meat on her face, right there.
- No!
- Oh my god, Tony!
(laughs)
- Oh my god.
- What is your man doing?
- He's eating pickles.
- Yo man is off the chain.
- Do you mind cleaning us up?
- Yeah, of course.
- With your tongue.
- Oh with my tongue.
- No, no oh my god.
No!
(collectively) Oh!
- Oh my god!
(laughs)
- Ya dude is up in it.
- Way more vicious then you have lead on.
- I literally love it.
♪ Let me give you some of this squash. ♪
It's butternut squash.
- Wow.
- Butter (bleep) in my mouth squash.
(laughs)
- It's pretty good.
- Ooh, my god.
- Do you like having fingers in your mouth.
- Not really.
- Not really and I just did it to you.
- I just accepted it.
- You're super submissive.
- Yes, definitely.
- Are you a faithful person.
- Are you a faithful person?
- Yeah.
- Yeah? - of course.
- Have you ever cheated?
- No, I have not.
- You could.
- But I don't plan to.
- Oh wow.
- Would you rather have your girlfriend
as your girlfriend or Beyonce?
- Oh, that's a tough one.
- Is it tough?
- Yeah, definitely my girlfriend.
- Wow.
- He picked you over Beyonce.
- You're gonna date her over Beyonce,
that's your girlfriend.
- Well yeah, but soon.
- I feel bad for Beyonce like, I'm not that good.
- Uh oh, I smell a Hannah and I
♪ Smell some chocolate mousse. ♪
- Would you like a bite of mousse Hannah?
- Let's see you do it Tony.
- Maddy, treat it like you're going (bleep) on your girl.
- Treat it like your going (bleep) on us.
- Ah.
- Ah! (laughs)
- More, more. (laughs)
- Keep going.
- Keep going?
- Is that how you do it, you usually stop after 10 seconds
- No, no.
- It's like oh I'm ready to (inaudible)
(laughs)
- Walk down and act like you giving him directions.
- Why is he doing
- Here's what you need to do.
No don't pull it out.
- Lick the top.
- I don't think I can
- Oh my.
- Come on Tony.
- Oh my god.
(laughs)
- More, more.
Oh! (laughs)
(laughs)
I can feel that on my (inaudible)
- Wow.
- For a young guy, he's a master.
- This man I
This man.
- Oh man.
- This man!
- That was delicious.
- Mm, it was.
- Have you seen enough?
- I've seen enough.
- I'm looking at the cake bro, I've seen too much.
- Alright Maddy, you can wrap it baby.
- Tony, I think we can wrap this up.
- Yeah, definitely.
- But I have another surprise for you.
- What is that?
- Lets get out of here.
- Okay, lets go.
- Come on big Tony.
Okay.
Tony is here.
(screams)
Big Tony can you see.
Come in.
(collective commotion)
They were watching.
Tony, take a seat, we gotta talk.
- Big Tony!
- Big Tony.
- Tony, listen, Diana called us because she
didn't know if you were relationship material,
and now we are gonna tell you if we should smash or dash.
- What you say Vena?
- Dash the guy.
I choose dash
- What!
- I do, he got in it!
He was having too much fun with Maddy.
- He was having a lot of fun with Maddy.
- Then you can see all this.
- You got to see a side of him that you haven't seen.
- Never seen before.
- And the side that you've been wanting to see.
- Yeah.
- So I think it's still a lot more for y'all to explore
so I'm gon say smash.
- Well you was opening up to strangers he ain't even know.
- Nope, no I disagree with you Vena
- Whatever.
- I disagree, you're trippin' like you got on clown shoes.
I'm gon say
smash!
You gotta stay with this dude, whatever it is you was
down for, he was happy to do and on top of all that,
he picked you over Beyonce, you can't deny that.
- Yeah honestly, honestly that was cute.
- Smash till you die because the way
he ate that chocolate cake
- I know that was
- We're cookin'
- That was intense, that was a good time.
You have some, on your nose right here
- Yeah you got some on your nose.
- Everywhere, in my nose.
- Look you still taking care of em,
that's what is, you guys belong together.
- Dash girl dash.
- I think its obvious that this is a perfect match,
you guys should smash.
- Well there you have it folks,
that's how we get down right here on
(collectively) smash or dash!
- That's definitely my boyfriend now after
I put him through all that, I think.
I'm definitely gonna smash (laughs)
That's my man right here.
That's my baby!
- Oh my god.
(laughs)