Hey, guys.
I recently got pulled over
for the first time
in a long time
for going 6
miles per hour over
the speed limit. True story.
But when it comes to being pulled over,
I'm either really lucky or
really good at getting out of getting a ticket.
I've been pulled over a total of four times now,
and each time, I got off with a warning.
This last time was probably the stupidest reason
I've ever gotten pulled over.
But I have to admit, the first 3 times, I kind of deserved it.
The first time I got
pulled over,
it was because I just didn't completely stop
at a stop sign. Okay, so maybe I didn't
really stop at all at the stop sign.
I kinda drifted. What? Tokyo drift was big
at the time.
[Driving]
YOLO, right? {Drives Fast}
I mean, the 2nd time, I kind of ran a red light.
I'm not gonna lie
It was an emergency.
I had to poop.
There should be a special light for that. There should be a brown light. Well, I mean, I
guess sometimes green does work. YOLO, right? And the third time, I mean, it wasn't
even a big deal. I just kind of stole a Toyota.
Oh my god, go, go, go, go, go, go, go! Go, go, go!
Wait, why are they even chasing us?
I stole this toy Yoda.
YOLO, right? (guffawing)
I deserve a ticket right now for saying YOLO three times in one video. Four
now. Anyway, I've had a lot of reasons to hate the police, just like everyone else.
But I'm not going to, because could you imagine how much it already sucks to be
a policeman? I mean, everyone hates on them. Take rappers, for example. They're
one of the most influential people in this world, and yet, they're always
hating on the police in their songs, especially, for whatever reason, at the
end of a verse right before the chorus.
- ♪ Every rap you see. ♪
♪ (rapping) ♪
♪ (bleep) the police. ♪
♪ (dubstep break) ♪
But I'm not a wrapper... clearly. Back to the topic, like I was saying before,
I got pulled over a few nights ago and got let off with a warning once again.
I know so many people who still get tickets for stupid reasons like this.
But like I said, either you're really unlucky or you're probably just doing it wrong.
So I'm gonna be giving you guys some tips on how not to get tickets. These are
the top three things that you shouldn't do when you get pulled over. Don't ever
try to convince him that he's wrong or he made a mistake.
Do you know why I
pulled you over?
Nope, actually, I really don't, because I'm very sure I was
within 35.
Do not make any excuses unless if it's an emergency, like your
cat is flying. What?
Do you know why I pulled you over?
I mean, it's not my
fault. I couldn't see the speed limit sign. I was going way too fast, and it was all
blurry, you know?
And no matter what, absolutely do not undermine him or try
to be a jerk to him.
Do you know why I pulled you over?
Um, cuz it's a slow day
for you, you had nothing better to do, you used to be popular in high school, and
you had all the power in the world, and all of a sudden when high school ended you
had no power, so you decided to become a policeman and pull people over for no
good reason?
What you want to do is show complete
respect. This is pretty close to what it looked like when I got pulled over.
Do you know why I pulled you over?
I am so sorry, officer. It was completely
irresponsible of me, and I should not have been going that fast. I sincerely apologize.
Well, you don't seem to be an asshole, so I'm gonna let you off with a
warning this time. Just be a little bit more cautious, all right?
Yes, yes, no, yes, yes, of course, yes. Thank you so much, sir. I-- thank you. Oh.
♪ (bleep) the police. ♪
YOLO!
And of course, if that method doesn't work, it also helps to have a big
rack as well.
Do you know why I pulled you--
Well, hello, Officer.
Oh, wow, yeah, that's quite a
big rack you have there.
It's all yours. Here you go.
Thank you. This is exactly
what I needed.
Without police, there would be so much crime, so much injustice, so
many murders. Well, I mean, there already are a lot of murders. I mean,
especially with all the shootings lately. And please do not start another gun
control debate in the comments. If you really want to know the answer to
keeping our people safe, the answer has been right in front of us the whole time.
Hide you kids. Hide your wife. I actually named my Wi-Fi after you.
It's HideYourKidsHideYourWiFi. Is that your--
Oh, yeah, this is-- and I did it myself,
me and my sister.
But you don't have the bandana?
Oh, no, it's at the hotel. (Ryan chuckles)
We're pretty much like best friends now so... but overall, just remember, the best way to
get out of getting a ticket is by not getting in one at all, and keep in mind
that all laws make complete sense and are here for a reason, and if there's
just one thing that you can take from this video or one thing that you can
remember, just remember this statement.
Do you know why I pulled you over?
I am so
sorry, officer. It was completely irresponsible of me, and I should not
have been going that fast. I sincerely apologize.
I appreciate that, but I'm
sorry. I'm still gonna have to write you a t--
Here. Here's my rack.
Nice try, son.
But I already got one earlier when I pulled over that--
How about this?
And you are
good to go. Have a nice day.
Everything is easier with a big rack.