Have you ever felt out of control have you ever been so mad that you did or
said something that you regretted later on have you ever felt like your emotions
were in control of you instead of the other way around let's talk about...
emotions.
I'm sure we all have felt this way before and today i'm going to be talking
about how i learned to control my emotions over the last seven years this
is a story of my own personal journey so you are going to hear me talk a lot
about my profession as a day trader but this message is really meant for
everyone if you ever read a book or watch the video on day trading they
probably talked about controlling your emotions so that you make smart
decisions with your money they might have said something like
don't act on anger eliminate fear learn to ignore your emotions even stuff your
feelings away deep down inside it's sometimes difficult to know whether
you're reading a self-help book or a book on how to make more money
maybe it's because they're not all that different but what do all these tips
have in common they are simply impractical and even
impossible to implement and from my own personal experience there is a much
better way to control your emotions i'm going to explain how i did so in this
video day trading is exhilarating it's like a roller coaster ride when you
enter a trade there is anticipation that the stock might take off to the moon
from 10 to 500 and you might make more money than you
ever dreamed of but when a trade is going against you you might think that
your life is about to be over as a stock plummet more than 90 percent and sadly
this is true because people have ended their own lives over their losses in the
stock market a lot of people get into trading stocks for the money but really
they stay for the thrill of it they get an emotional high when a trade is going
well and they become addicted the same way people get addicted to food alcohol
gambling or drugs they are seeking the hit of dopamine
and despite losses from blowing up trading accounts from following chat
room alerts the addiction keeps them coming back most people will tell you to
disconnect yourself from all human emotions so that you can make more
rational decisions basically they want you to be awoken from star trek
as if you can somehow characterize your emotions technically yes you could
disconnect yourself from your emotions just like psychology tells us that we
can and guess what in the field of psychology they call this a disorder if
people disconnect from their emotions they also lose their connection to time
plays identity and ultimately reality when they do so this disconnect of
emotions is often developed in response to a serious life trauma it merely is a
coping mechanism that we could develop especially as young kids in order to
deal with the problems in life that are too big for us to handle because we were
just children but what is different now is that we are adults and not kids
anymore now we have the power and the experience to choose we have the
strength to feel our emotions and still be okay i know this may sound a bit
extreme here i know but it is to prove a point lots of advice in the trading
industry or from your friends or family members believe that people can think
their way through their emotions they preach that you should separate your
emotions from your actions and i think this is wrong what i've learned is that
you have to feel your way through your emotions emotions are an integral part
of the human experience you cannot truly remove them nor should
you imagine the joy of getting into a top university after months of studying
for exams or falling in love for the first time or even the loss that you
feel when someone close to you passes away by removing all of those feelings
wouldn't that be robbing us of our true and genuine experience as humans it's
important that as humans we allow ourselves to feel those emotions even
the bad ones you and i were strong enough to feel our feelings and come out
the other end in one piece you cannot just feel the good emotions and shut
down the bad feelings yes this is something we all learned from pixar's
animated film inside out
at this point you must be thinking i came here for the bad jokes and now i
got with this lousy talk and emotions well how do you feel about that now
see i have plenty of bad jokes for you okay okay one more to make you feel
better why did 50 cents replace nickelback at the super bowl performance
because of inflation [Music]
okay i know that was a bad joke please don't will smith me you came here to
learn how to make money with trading and boring you with your feelings but
believe it or not being in tuned not removed from your emotions is an
integral part of achieving success in day trading and also in life and i do
know a lot about the subject because i used to have an anger problem i know i
know i'm this tiny asian girl that loves to laugh at bad jokes and likes to help
others make money in the stock market i can't be serious about having an anger
problem seeing me angry must be like seeing a little angry mouse but that
still doesn't mean i didn't have an anger problem in fact i had to go
through anger management therapy and two years of counseling to deal with it the
point is i really did have an anger issue and i believe it was rooted in my
early experience as an immigrant from taiwan to canada when i was little i
talked about this in detail in this video but in short i had a lot of
trouble fitting into my neighborhood and especially in high school it was a
problem that started out small but over time it grew bigger and bigger and the
more i bottled it up and avoided talking about it the more it built until
eventually it exploded and i go crazy and destroy all the like buttons around
me the secret is i'm always angry and it comes out if you don't smash the like
button i'm saying this because i've learned
that you cannot truly bury your emotions away if you do that your feelings
eventually could overflow in some weird way because you bottle them up for so
long they will eventually explode there are many ways this can express itself it
could be yelling at someone for something insignificant excessive
shopping emotional eating drinking drugs or worst of all revenge trading
[Music]
whether you realize it or not your subconscious knows something it knows
that your bad feelings have to come out before the positive ones could enter and
these expressions are just some of the many ways that this could happen there's
something called the anger iceberg that i'd like to talk about in the future so
if you want to see me make a video on this topic let me know in the comment
section below so we've established that you can't control your emotions and you
can't just ignore your feelings so what are you supposed to do with all these
feelings especially when they seem so overwhelming this is going to sound
silly but we have to feel our feelings we have to recognize our emotions as
they come when i first started down this journey about managing my feelings it
was to become a better trader in reality though it made me a better person which
also made me a better trader i'd like to share one of the exercises i used to do
in therapy with you today to do this exercise start by making simple
statements of i feel blank at first i thought this would be very
easy and frankly kind of stupid instead i found out that i only had baby words
to describe my complex adult emotions i was saying very basic things like i feel
happy i feel
sad i feel mad
i know not exactly jane austen material now is it
however through conscious efforts and pushing to state even more complex
emotions eventually i was able to describe my feelings as i feel relaxed i
feel thrilled disturbed impatient resentful overwhelmed and calm and just
like anything else learning about your own emotions will take practice i write
down daily in an emotions journal the same way i'd keep a trading journal as
well in fact there was a period of time where
these two journals would go hand-in-hand together i'd even make notes and track
how i'm feeling when i enter a trade to see if there were any patterns in making
my trading decisions it's through this journaling experience that it made me
more aware of who i am and why with that awareness i could make a more
informed decision about my life choices as well as in the stock market i have
another video that talks about this in more detail called how day trading
changed my life by no means am i an expert in this field however i've made
leaps in transformations with my own emotional control over the years by
recognizing and embracing them i still have a long way to go and i will
continue to improve myself and that will be reflected in my daily life as well as
in my own trading journey if you've also struggled with your emotions such as
anger or stress i really hope that you will share your stories in the comment
section below i'd love to hear them and i really hope that my story somehow made
a positive impact on your journey thank you guys so much for watching as always
i'm the humble trader and i'll see you guys next time
[Music] [Applause]
you