The Hunger Games did a lot of things
right faithfully adapting Suzanne
Collins best-selling books into a
blockbuster franchise that launched
Jennifer Lawrence into worldwide
superstar status but as good as it was
it didn't quite do everything right
here's a look at some dumb things
everyone ignores about The Hunger Games
idiocracy the basic concept of The
Hunger Games
takes some suspension of disbelief buy
into but even then the politics don't
really make much sense think about this
the folks in the districts do all the
hard labor to keep the rich people in
the capital flush with food and coal and
amazing hair dyes considering they need
the workers in the districts to keep
working wouldn't it make way more sense
to actually you know feed them enough to
do that work Plus given how
technologically advanced the Capitol is
using just a little bit of that know-how
to help automate things like coal mining
would significantly boost productivity
while also raising quality of life and
morale in the district's acting like a
bunch of evil jerks might be fun but it
doesn't make good business sense
drinking games when we first met
Haymitch he's pretty much a useless
snarky drunk with no interest in helping
Katniss and Peeta figure out how to
survive when the fighting begins then
the next morning jerkface is gone and
has suddenly been replaced by a helpful
wise mentor who whips the district 12
team into shape that change happened
literally overnight so maybe all
Haymitch needed that whole time was a
good breakfast coaching sales
speaking of Haymitch he's apparently the
smartest dude in the entire country
because when the games actually begins
the contestants from every other
district act like a bunch of idiots
Haymitch is big piece of advice is to
ignore the supplies of the cornucopia
and just run for the woods because it's
going to be a bloodbath as the others
fight over the goodies and it is
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it seems obvious but apparently the
mentors in other districts didn't think
the past is nugget of wisdom along to
their kids because sure enough a bunch
of them get creamed in the first 30
seconds maybe their mentors were even
drunker than Haymitch wait no that's
impossible it's well after breakfast by
this point burn baby burn a pivotal
moment in The Hunger Games takes place
when Katniss is chased up a tree by a
pack of other contestant after a
half-hearted effort to kill her Peeta
convinces them to just make a campfire
and wait for her to die of like old age
or something that turns out to be a bad
plan because through a complete stroke
of luck
Katniss finds a conveniently placed high
full of genetically modified bees which
she drops on their dumb head expose your
tracker jackers am I wrong
those things are very least along very
but if those kids can make fire why
didn't they just you know set fire to
the tree dreams are made of wood right
even in the future and if the flames
didn't get hurt the smoke probably would
have or at least forced her to jump
which probably would have heard pretty
bad way to go you dead dum-dums cake
wars Peeta may not be the most useful
guy with a weapon but he sure is one
hell of a painter he shows off his
incredible camouflage artistry during
training and again uses it to go
incognito after suffering a pretty
substantial sword wound to the leg we're
told he picked up this rare and
impressive skill by decorating cakes at
the district 12 bakery really yeah I
should have carried the cakes down to
bakery so does that mean the US military
should be tapping the camouflage skills
of dust Ace of Cakes golden chick cake
boss be teaching courses to army cadets
at West Point about how to disguise
yourself as a giant edible pink rose for
combat reasons since how the hell does
baking and decorating cakes teach a kid
how to go full-on mud man listen Peeta
we're calling shenanigans the amount of
effort and talent it would take to
create that spotless camouflage is a
whole lot more than you
up by writing happy birthday here's a
cold cake a few times a week with an
icing quarter plus since we're on the
subject how would anyone in district 12
which is entirely made up of starving
coal miners have the cash to get a cake
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