she liked the dress last year was my
best and most successful year in
business the business that I co-founded
and run more than doubled and turnover a
recruited new staff our new contracts I
wrote and published my first book and a
would award after award I wore this
dress to collect this award and a
glittering award ceremony down in London
when this award have been the best
businesswomen in recruitment with this
wonderful dress on which I was so glad
to be able to wear again and my hair and
my makeup done I felt a million dollars
it was such a proud moment that I could
share with colleagues and friends been
able to collect the award and it was a
truly special evening a repeat of this
award win a few weeks later and a few
weeks later again it got to the point
where my friends used to joke and call
me that Ant & Dec of Business Awards I
shared all of these wins on social media
as I should do I was really proud of
them it was a phenomenal year and
actually why not shout about that why
not promote that and show those wins
because it was recognition of a lot of
hard work our clients love to hear about
our successes and every time I was going
out and seeing clients they would often
comment on these awards and these
successes but I'm sure that I'm not
alone in being guilty of only showcasing
the highlights on my social media the
parts that I want to share and the good
bits so yes last year appeared
impressive I was at these glamorous
events I was at these awards ceremonies
towards the end of the year I even moved
into my dream house it really was a
truly brilliant year you're superwoman
people used to say to me you've done so
well how did you
you eat with things that I was often
hearing and yes on the face of it my
life looks impressive
now does but that hasn't happened
overnight it has taken a phenomenal
amount of hard work to get to that point
and it's not easy at all now even it's
hard it's hard
people see the glamour in my show real
and they make assumptions last year was
my best year let me take you back to
2014 2015
or even 2016 which were far from it
the business I co-founded back in 2013 I
set that up after leaving a very
well-paid corporate job I set the
business up because I've had young - it
might have my baby at that point and I
was commuting from Newcastle down to
London every week which was very
challenging so I slept the business up
because I thought that that would give
me more opportunities to be at home and
be around for my daughter and also it
would help me to maintain the level of
ambition that I've always had the thing
would start in a business is anyone who
has ever done that all know is that the
money doesn't just roll in it takes a
lot of hard work it takes a lot of
resilience there are a phenomenal amount
of ups and downs it also takes a huge
amount of belief that what you're doing
adds value and that through those hard
times you will be adding value and
creating something that is powerful and
important with longevity so in those
early years I took a wage but it was
really small it was a third of what I'd
been on in my corporate job now that
might have been okay had my personal
life not imploded spectacularly in 2014
so less than a year after setting up the
business I got divorced so I went from
being fairly comfortable to being a
divorced single mum of a just turned
two-year-old on this basic wage I'm
actually quite glad that
when it did because I have to reflect on
that time now and think have that happen
before I set the business so if I
probably would never have set it up I
would have taken the safe option or just
stayed in the corporate job so I can
look back now with the hindsight of a
few years down the line and be thankful
for that happening when it did so I was
on this basic wage hardly any money I
couldn't keep the mortgage on my house
which was so frustrating because I was
newly self-employed or not very much
money
my childcare costs were around a
thousand pounds a month which was more
than I was anything so that was crazy I
couldn't drive
it's amazing how limiting not driving is
it was unreal so I had decision to make
there were some very dark days during
that time where I wanted to hide and if
you were connected to me on social media
at that point in time you would have
noticed that I went very quiet and I
think that's often a sign that things
aren't right I mean imagine state's
update sophie is sitting in the living
room with the curtains closed not hugely
inspiring or exciting but that was the
reality although the thing is when
you've got a small child you can't have
very many days where you sit in the
house with the curtains closed
especially with a two-year-old so I'd be
woken up at four five or if I was lucky
6:00 in the morning and I'd have to get
up put my smile on and be mom and do the
best that I could for my daughter a wage
of the options what should i do should I
go back to a corporate job or should I
persevere with the business and it came
to the conclusion that going for the
business and growing that business would
be a better long-term option but I knew
that it would be hard I used to tell
myself the next two years are going to
be tough you're going to be skint but
sort out keep in the house and learnt a
bloody Drive so that's what I did that's
what I did my lovely dad pretended to
the bank that he would work till he was
75 years old so that he could go onto
the mortgage with me and I could keep
the house I'm very lucky that he was
able to do that for me the downside of
age though meant that the mortgage term
reduced so the payment went up so that
just added to the financial pressure
that I was under but I felt that it was
really important to keep the house
because that was some stability for me
and for my daughter and I think that's
where my maternal instinct really did
kick in because I wanted to try and keep
things as safe and as familiar as I
possibly could for her so that was a
real priority for me but clearly having
a mortgage that was double what it was
my thousand-pound childcare cost and
that's before we even look at anything
else it was tough so I quickly boomed
through my savings they went in the
space of a couple of months I had none
left I had to borrow 30,000 pounds just
to get through that that period I had
nothing we literally did nothing we
would do anything that was free we would
do it but we didn't do anything that
cost any money and I worked really
really hard but actually for me working
hard is actually a good distraction and
I was able to channel a lot of the
unhappiness that I felt at that time
into work an integral bank that has now
become very special things slowly
started to improve
I quickly passed my driving test and I
say quickly with a bit of a smile on my
face because I started learning when I
was 17 and if you kind of think about
the masses when I passed it took me
quite a while to pass that and if anyone
didn't like the theory test if it takes
to you'd last for two years I ended up
doing my few tests ten times the guy in
the test center joked me one time that
they were gonna invite me to their
Christmas party I don't even really know
what he meant and then someone explained
it to me afterwards okay and I just used
to let it expire at a finger thing with
with something that you don't
particularly want to do if you take easy
option so I used to say what just matter
have I failed it again doesn't matter
because I'm living in London so it's
easy to get the tube it's easy to walk
to places it doesn't matter I would make
excuses when I found myself in this
situation it was time to stop the
excuses for the driving I need
to pass my test because it would give me
more freedom it's so hard to cart a baby
around with all the stuff that you need
for that and not to be able to drive so
when I made that decision to pass the
test I quickly in two months passed that
test and getting that piece of paper was
a phenomenal feeling this is my first
car basic and functional but I loved it
and it gave me a new lease of life and
it gave me freedom I'm motivated by
money is that vulgar some people will
think it is when I was younger
money represented success and nice
things now it means so much more I have
to say that childcare is my biggest
challenge for business which is insane
because childcare shouldn't be relevant
to business should it but it is for me
what money and success has brought to me
is a peace of mind it's brought me
freedom in its brought me security when
I'm planning for school holidays now I
spend lots of time pulling together all
of the different activities that are
going in going on around our city and
I'll sit down with my daughter Jessica
we'll look at them together and we'll
plan what she's going to go to each week
that makes me feel good because she's
going to things that she wants to go to
she enjoys it and we have a great time
for a debrief at the end of each day
about what she's been up to and it
allows me to concentrate with my job it
also means that when I have quality time
off I can enjoy that time and it's
special time that we enjoy together I
always finish work early on a Friday
that's something that I hold very very
close to my heart and it's something
that I protect as much as possible so
I'm there at 3 o'clock ready to pick my
daughter up from the art and we go and
do stuff together one of our favorite
things is to go to the beach the coast
near where we live and we can easily do
20 quid in on those 2p machines just to
win a key ring
she loves it brilliant I enjoy the fish
and chips on the way home but it's
really special time as our school event
and therefore parents evening and
therefore the plays that concerts the
assemblies and they are tight that's
time it's protected and if I've gone
back to my early decision and I'd gone
back to the corporate wall would I have
had as much flexibility and freedom as I
have now probably not so I now get asked
how I did what I've done and where my
grit comes from and I think it comes
from needing to feel secure that feeling
of vulnerability and insecurity when I
went through my divorce was horrific
I wouldn't wish that on anyone and I
seek security and I seek that that
comfort that I have now and it also
comes down to two things which is taking
action and making the best of every
opportunity we all have ups and downs in
life and my downs are probably really
insignificant compared to many others
but when you're in that down period it's
tough we can't change what happens to us
most of the time but we can change how
we deal with it back in 2014 even in
those darkest of days I would take
action every single day that might be
cooking something healthy for my
daughter it might be taking a driving
lesson or it could be working on my
business or doing some exercise
something that was positive every single
day as I gained confidence I said yes to
more and more opportunities I started
noticing these opportunities that were
everywhere some of the most scary
opportunities were the best I went on a
business retreat with 20 women from
around the world which was brilliant and
love chatted about business of three
days to work on a business and chat
business was a fantastic opportunity and
I came back with loads of ideas and
energy I took a new qualification I took
the opportunity to scale up the business
and here's the secret the more you say
yes to things the more opportunities
present themselves and the easier they
become when I had the opportunity to
write my book last year wow that was
amazing if anyone ever gets the
opportunity to write a book or create
your own opportunity brilliant take it
love date I absolutely loved it the
opportunities that came off the back of
that to do my book launches and it asked
to speak on podcasts I've been given a
column in a career magazine all
brilliant opportunities this talk even
came off the back of the book and I have
to be really honest and say that this is
probably one of the scariest
opportunities I've ever said yes to I
felt so thick in the months the weeks
that hours the minutes leading up to
coming onto this stage but how could I
say no
it's been a brilliant opportunity and I
feel so grateful to be here and to be
able to enjoy this opportunity so I want
my daughter to know that anything is
possible with enthusiasm and hard work
there are opportunities for everyone
everywhere you've just got to take them
taking opportunities allows you to
create your own show wheel thank you
[Applause]
[Music]