FOLKS, MY FIRST GUEST STARS AS SPECIAL AGENT DALE COOPER IN
"TWIN PEAKS" AND AS THE MAYOR IN "PORTLANDIA."
PLEASE WELCOME, KYLE MacLACHLAN!
>> WHAT A NICE THING.
>> Stephen: THEY'RE LOVELY.
THEY'RE LOVELY PEOPLE.
>> A LOVELY GROUP TONIGHT.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) UPON.
>> Stephen: THEY'RE EXCITED TO SEE KYLE MacLACHLAN.
NOW, LISTEN, I'M EXCITED TO SEE KYLE MacLACHLAN, TOO.
WE MET YEARS AGO.
>> WE DID.
>> Stephen: ABOUT EIGHT YEARS AGO AT THE KENNEDY CENTER.
>> THAT'S WHERE IT WAS.
>> Stephen: THAT WAS THE ONLY TIME WE MET.
I DIDN'T HAVE A CHANCE TO TELL YOU THAT NIGHT BUT I WANTED TO
MEET YOU IN PERSON BECAUSE WHEN I WAS YOUNGER, WHEN I WAS FIRST
OUT OF COLLEGE AND BLEW VELVET CAME OUT, MY FRIENDS WERE LIKE,
"OH, MY GOD.
THAT'S YOU.
YOU LOOK JUST LIKE THAT GUY IN BLUE VELVET."
>> YES.
>> Stephen: I WANTED TO MEET YOU AND DO A SIDE-BY-SIDE.
CAN WE GET A CLOSE-UP?
CAN WE GET CLOSER THAN THAT?
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: I CAN'T SEE A THING OUT OF THESE.
THAT'S PRETTY GOOD.
SO I BUY IT.
I TOTALLY BUY IT.
I COULD BE LIKE A FREAKY CHARACTER WHO COMES ON IN "TWIN
PEAKS."
"WAIT, IS THAT THE GUY OR IS THAT A DIFFERENT GUY?"
>> THAT WOULD BE PERFECT.
YOU COULD BE MY EIGHTH CHARACTER I PLAY ON "TWIN PEAKS."
>> Stephen: BUT I'LL TELL YOU THE PART-- THE PART THAT I WAS
MOST JEALOUS OF IS I'M A BIG FAN OF "DUNE."
>> I HEARD THAT.
>> Stephen: YES.
>> WHAT A GREAT, GREAT BOOK.
>> Stephen: AMAZING.
WHEN-- HAD YOU READ THE BOOKS BEFORE YOU GOT THE PART?
>> YES, JIM LUMBARD GAVE ME THE BOOK WHEN I WAS 15 YEARS OLD, MY
FRIEND JIMLUMBARD-- AND I HOPE HE'S WATCHING-- AND HE SAID,
"YOU HAVE TO READ THIS BOOK."
IT TOOK ME THREE TRIES TO GET PAST PAGE 60.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT SO MANY THINGS COMING AT YOU.
>> Stephen: THERE ARE A THE LOVE NAMES COMING AT YOU.
>> BUT IT WAS MY FAVORITE BOOK FOR YEARS.
I WROTE "DUNE" QUOTES ON MY PLEASURE TEACHER'S--
MRS. KRAGO-- ON HER BLACKBOARD, I WOULD WRITE QUOTES.
THIS IS FROM EIGHTH GRADE.
>> Stephen: FEAR IS THE MIND FIRSKILLER.
I WILL LET FEAR PASS THROUGH ME.
>> "ONLY I WILL REMAIN."
>> Stephen: EXACTLY.
>> EIGHTH GRADE, OF COURSE, IT'S ALL ABOUT FEAR.
>> Stephen: BECAUSE YOU THOUGHT SOME DAY I WILL PLAY
PAUL.
DID YOU THINK THAT?
>> NO.
>> Stephen: I THOUGHT.
I READ "DUNE" MY FRESHMAN YEAR OF EQUIP DUNE."
I SAID I MUST PLAY PAUL.
>> YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN PERFECT.
>> Stephen: AND THEN I SAW THAT YOU GOT THE PART, AND I WAS
REALLY ANGRY AT KYLE MacLACHLAN.
I DIDN'T WORK AT THAT POINT, BUT ANYWAY--
>> WHEN YOU MET ME AT THE KENNEDY CENTER YOU SAID, "WELL,
HE'S ACTUALLY OKAY."
>> Stephen: YEAH, I DID.
I HAD A LOT TO DRINK.
NOW, MOST PEOPLE KNOW YOU FROM YOUR COLLABORATIONS WITH DAVID
LYNCH.
>> YES.
>> Stephen: OBVIOUSLY, "DUNE"-- WAS "DUNE" FIRST?
>> "DUNE" WAS NUMBER ONE.
>> Stephen: THEN "BLUE VELVET."
AND, OF COURSE, "TWIN PEAKS."
THE FIRST TIME AND NOW THE SECOND TIME.
>> FIRST TIME, 20-SOMETHING YEARS LATER.
>> Stephen: WHAT'S IT LIKE TO BE DIRECTED BY HIM?
BECAUSE-- >> YEAH.
>> Stephen: THE PROJECTS ARE BRILLIANT, BUT A BIT ODD.
I'M WONDERING HOW HE EXPLAINS WHAT HE WANTS FROM AN ACTOR.
>> WE HAVE A SHORTHAND, AFTER ALL THE YEARS WORKING TOGETHER,
AND DAVID HAS A VERY PARTICULAR WAY OF DIRECTING-- NOT JUST ME
BUT EVERYONE WHO WORKS WITH HIM.
FOR ME HE WOULD SAY SOMETHING LIKE, "NOW, KALE, KALE!"
HE CALLS ME KALE, THAT'S ANOTHER STORY.
BECAUSE DURING "DUNE" DINO DE LA RENTIS WHO PRODUCED IT COULDN'T
CALL ME KYLE.
AND DAVID PICKED THAT UP, AND SO NOW HE CALLS ME KALE.
HE SAYS, "KALE, IT MEEDZ MORE ELVIS.
GIVE ME A LITTLE MORE ELVIS."
OR, "IT IS MORE THE MYSTERY HERE."
OR "A WIND, THINK OF A WIND."
( LAUGHTER ) ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Stephen: UH-HUH.
>> SORRY, DAVID.
SO I'M LIKE-- BUT FOR ME, THAT'S PERFECT-- THAT'S PERFECT.
IT JUST GIVES ME ENOUGH.
I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HE'S TALKING ABOUT, AND OFF WE GO AND WE MAKE
THESE-- THESE CRAZY THINGS.
>> Stephen: BUT DO YOU ALWAYS KNOW WHAT IT IS YOU'RE MAKING?
NO.
>> Stephen: FOR INSTANCE-- LAUGH BECAUSE THE PROJECTS ARE
OFTEN QUITE ODD, AND I'M ON THE TRAIN FOR "TWIN PEAKS."
I JUST HAVE NO (BLEEP) IDEA WHERE THE TRAIN IS GOING.
>> WELL, NO, BUT THAT--
DAVID, DAVID DOESN'T REALLY CARE WHAT-- WHERE-- WHAT YOU THINK,
WHERE YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING.
YOU'RE ON THE TRAIN, AND YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING SOMEWHERE.
BUT HE'S LIKE, "NO, NO.
I'M TAKING YOU WHERE I WANT YOU TO GO."
SO YOU GET ON THE TRAIN AND THE DOORS CLOSE, AND THERE YOU GO.
>> Stephen: WHAT ABOUT, LIKE, WHEN YOU GET YOUR SHOT LIST FOR
THE DAY, THE THINGS THAT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO DO?
CAN YOU GET A SENSE OF WHAT IT IS?
>> FOR INSTANCE, THIS LAST SEQUENCE WE DID IS LIKE I'M
FALLING THROUGH SPACE FOR QUITE A LONG TIME.
I LAND ON THE EDGE OF A BALCONY, KIND OF IN A CONCRETE-- LOOKING
OUT OVER THE OCEAN.
IT LOOKS KIND OF 30s.
I WALK THROUGH THE WINDOW CASEMENTS, I WALK IN, AND I MEET
A WOMAN WITH NOIZE SITTING IN FRONT OF A FIREPLACE.
AND WE HAVE A CONVERSATION WHERE SHE'S TRYING TO WARN ME OF
SOMETHING BUT SHE DOESN'T SPEAK ENGLISH.
MEANWHILE, THERE'S A LOUD BANGING OUTSIDE HERE THAT'S
REALLY CAUSING US A LOT OF CONSTERNATION.
WE GET UP, WE WALK ON TO A LADDER.
WE CLIMB ON TO THE ROOF AND STAND ON A PLATFORM WHICH IS
FLOATING IN A VOID.
( LAUGHTER ) SHE'S TRYING TO PUSH A LEVER.
I'M LOOKING DOWN AND I SEE THE HEAD OF MAJOR GARLAND BRIGGS
FLOATING BENEATH ME LIKE A GIANT BLUE WHALE.
AND I'M LIKE, "IT'S DAVID LYNCH.
THAT'S WHERE I'M GOING."
>> Stephen: WOW.
>> "I'M GOOD GOODWITH IT.
>> Stephen: "THAT'S MY JOB TODAY."
>> THAT'S MY JOB TODAY.
>> Stephen: YOU GOT ANOTHER SHOW, YOU PLAY THE MAYOR OF
PORTLAND IN "PORTLANDIA."
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> YES.
>> Stephen: AND YOU'RE-- YOU'RE FROM THE PACIFIC
NORTHWEST, RIGHT?
>> I AM I GREW UP IN YAKIMA, YAKIMA, WASHINGTON.
NO, NOT POSSIBLE.
>> Stephen: JUST GIVE IT TO THEM.
>> OKAY, YOU'RE GOOD.
>> Stephen: NOW, DO YOU THINK THAT YOU ARE PLAYING A
CARICATURE OF SOMEONE FROM THE PACIFIC NORTHWEST, OR IS THIS
WHAT PEOPLE FROM PORTLAND ARE LIKE.
>> THEY'RE VERY ENTHUSIASTIC, AND THE MAYOR IS VERY
ENTHUSIASTIC, AND THE PEOPLE IN PORTLAND, THEY'RE VERY COMMITTED
PEOPLE.
IF THEY BELIEVE IN SOMETHING-- YOUR THING COULD BE YOU FORAGE
FOR MUSHROOMS, BUT A CERTAIN KIND OF MUSHROOM ON A CERTAIN
HILL ON THE NORTH-FACING SLOPE OF THAT HILL, UNDER CERTAIN
TREES, AND THAT'S YOUR THING.
AND WHEN YOU FORAGE, YOU BRING THEM BACK TO PORTLAND TO SELL TO
THE RESTAURANTS THERE.
AND YOU CAN MAKE A LIVING DOING THAT.
>> Stephen: WELL, THAT DOESN'T SOUND BAD.
>> NOT SO BAD, RIGHT GR WE HAVE A CLIP HERE OF YOU, THE MAYOR,
BEING PASSIONATE.
I THINK ABOUT DIVERSITY.
>> YES, TO OUR CITY.
>> Stephen: OKAY.
>> Stephen: JIM, I THINK WE HAVE A CLIP HERE OF KYLE AS--
KALE-- AS THE MAYOR.
>> THIS.
DID YOU SEE THIS?
>> IT'S COMMON KNOWLEDGE, PORTLAND IS VERY WHITE.
>> YES, BUT "LEAST DIVERSE?" LEAST?
I DON'T WANT TO BE THE LEAST AT ANYTHING.
>> YOU KNOW, I ACTUALLY THINK THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.
I THINK IT'S A GOOD TIME TO DO SOME SOUL-SEARCHING, TO ASK
OURSELVES THE TOUGH QUESTIONS.
>> THE TOUGH QUESTIONS I WANT TO ASK IS WHY THAT JOURNALIST IS
PRINTING THESE LIES?
I HAVE MANY PEOPLE OF COLOR WORKING HERE AT CITY HALL, MANY
PEOPLE OF COLOR.
>> THAT'S GREAT.
>> YES, SAM, GET IN HERE.
>> YES, SIR.
>> SAM, ARE YOU WHITE?
>> I AM.
>> DAMN IT.
BUT YOU'RE GAY, RIGHT?
>> YES.
>> A RAINBOW ISN'T WHITE.
( APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: HEARTFELT.
>> HEARTFELT THEY ARE HEADLIGHT FELT.
>> Stephen: YOU HAVE DONE SOMETHING THAT IS VERY PORTLAND.
YOU STARTED YOUR OWN WINE COUNTRY.
>> I DID.
>> Stephen: WOULD YOU MIND.
>> IT'S DEFINITELY COCKTAIL HOUR.
>> Stephen: WE HAVE A BOTTLE OF YOUR CABERNET SAF NONE
RESERVE, PURSUED BY BEAR.
>> PURSUED BY BEAR.
VERY GOOD.
>> Stephen: I AM NOT A BIG WINE GUY-- THAT LOOKS REALLY--
PUNCH IN THE MOUTH RIGHT THERE.
>> DID YOU NOTICE THE TWIST OF THE BOTTLE?
>> Stephen: WHAT DO YOU THINK?
I WAS A WAITER.
I WAS AN ACTOR-- >> YOU LEARNED FROM THE BEST.
>> Stephen: DID YOU-- DID YOU EVER WAIT TABLES?
>> I NEVER WAITED TABLE S.
>> Stephen: YOU KNOW WHY BECAUSE YOU WERE PAUL AND I WAS
WAITING TABLES.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT TASTING NOTES OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT.
SO WHAT DO I NEED TO SMELL HERE?
>> YOU VUFTV TO LOOK, YOU KNOW, SORT OF SERIOUS AND INTERESTED
AN CATCH SOME OF THE AROMA IN THE GLASS.
AND YOU WANT TO SWIRL A LITTLE BIT TO MAKE THE AROAM AS COME.
>> Stephen: RIGHT, RIGHT, RIGHT.
>> YOU SAY I'M GETTING HINTS-- YOU CAN SAY NOTES, YOU CAN SAY
HINTS.
I'M GETTING NOTES OF BLUEBERRY.
>> Stephen: I'M GETTING A LITTLE SOUR CHERRY.
>> SOUR CHERRY, VERY, VERY GOOD.
>> Stephen: SOUR CHERRY.
>> AND THEN YOU HAVE A LITTLE TASTE.
>> MMM!
>> YOU CAN SAY THINGS LIKE, I GET PENCIL LEAD.
A LITTLE BIT OF PENCIL LEAD.
>> Stephen: (BLEEP), PENCIL LEAD.
>> NOT KIDDING.
PENCIL LEAD.
YOU CAN DO WET STONE, A LITTLE BIT OF WET STONE, PERHAPS.
>> Stephen: JUST A HINT OF GYM BAG LEFT IN A LOCKER.
>> THAT'S OKAY.
>> Stephen: WET STONE TASTES LIKE SOMETHING?
>> YEAH, IT GIVES YOU -- >> Stephen: WHAT DOES WEST WET
STONE TASTE LIKE?
>> WHATEVER YOU SORT OF TASTE IN THERE, THE FLAVORS, IT REMINDS
OF YOU OF, YOU KNOW, THERE CAN BE CERTAIN KINDS OF MUSHROOMS.
BUT YOU WANT TO THEN BRING IT BACK, "YES OVER-RIDING THERE IS
A CHOCOLATE, DARK-FRUIT CHERRY KIND OF FLAVORS."
>> Stephen: AND IS THERE ANY WAY OF KNOWING WHETHER YOU'RE
LYING TO ME?
( LAUGHTER ) BECAUSE IT'S ALL SUBJECTIVE,
RIGHT?
>> AS LONG AS YOU KEEP YOUR FACE VERY SERIOUS.
>> Stephen: I'LL SAY THISY, THOUGH, THIS IS NOT A VANITY
BOTTLE OF WINE.
THIS IS ABSOLUTELY DELICIOUS.
>> THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
>>> Stephen: I COULD STICK A STRAW IN THIS AND SUCK IT DOWN.
KYLE, THANK YOU SO MUCH.
THANK YOU FOR THE HINTS OF CHERRY.
THE FINAL SEASON OF "PORTLANDIA" AIRS THURSDAY NIGHTS ON IFC.
KYLE MacLACHLAN, EVERYBODY!
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH DEON COLE.