I have something to show you.
What's up?
I was going to give this to you at the end of the season party.
But I was so excited
that I wanted you to see it now.
What the hell is that?
I couldn't find any girl baseball trophies,
so I made you one.
Why's your head so big?
It's a Barbie head.
I had to improvise.
You chop the head off one of my Barbies?
Don't be silly.
I bought a new one.
I could of had a new Barbie?
The point is, you deserve to be recognized
appropriately for everything you've accomplished.
You can't give that to me in front of all the boys.
Why?
It's embarrassing.
Well, we have plenty of time.
I can make the head smaller or the body
bigger or
a little bit of both.
I just want the same trophy everyone else gets.
But I want you to feel special.
And I just want to feel regular.
Okay,
well,
I'll make sure you get a regular one at the party.
Thank you.
Mom, wait.
I get what you were trying to do.
It's nice.
Thanks.
Get him, Dalton, get 'em.
Mary Cooper, what are you doing?
Nothing. Why are you watching Roadhouse?
Why aren't you at work?
I asked you first.
And my question is way more interesting.
It was just on.
I don't even know what that is.
Then how'd you know his name's Dalton?
I don't have to explain myself to you.
This is a pretty dirty movie.
How do you know? It is rated R.
For violence, language and sexual content.
You should be ashamed of yourself.
Hey, Mary.
You get a chance to send out those checks.
Not yet, but I'll get to it.
All right.
It's just that the checks to the vendors go
out on Tuesdays and
it's Thursday.
I know the days of the week, Brenda.
Okay.
You want checks? Here's checks.
Mancuso.
Maintenance.
$45.
There you go.
Mary.
Lone Star Bending, $200.
Okay, if you're mad, just talk to me instead of whatever this is.
I'm not mad.
Okay, come on, Mary. We're friends.
Just not as good of friends as you are with my husband.
Okay, if you're going to keep working here,
we have to figure this out.
Maybe I shouldn't work here.
Maybe you shouldn't.
Are you firing me?
Well, I thought you were quitting.
Maybe I was.
Then maybe I was.
Then I am.
Then I do.
Great, then I'm leaving.
Well, I'm a little confused,
but okay!
Can I help ya'll find anything?
Oh, we're good. Just showing my friend around
campus.
Oh. Are you a new student?
Oh, actually, Jason, this is Mary.
Ah, well. Hello, Mary.
Allow me to welcome you to our school.
Thank you.
Uh, you know, my dorm is doing a back to school barbecue
this afternoon. Y'all should swing by.
Sounds fun.
Cool. Braden Hall in the courtyard, 1 o' clock.
See you there. Sweet free food.
Who cares? He thought I was a student
The Bible tells us God created the earth, not
the earths.
Ugh, why did I have to marry a preacher?
Because it was God's will to bless us with union.
I hope it's his plan that I hit the clubs tonight.
Cause that's gonna happen.
Why am I the only normal one in this family?
If you're the only normal one, statistically
speaking, you're abnormal.
Ha.
Freak.
Stop picking on him. You're gonna give him a complex and he'll
end up in therapy.
You New Yorkers and your therapy.
The only therapy I ever got was on my
backside from Papi's belt.
Oh, spanking.
That's hot.
What the heck?
You think you can just wash me away?
Yes. I use the gentle cleansing cream
formula one with special emollients.
Exploiting your Bible study group.
That was just the beginning.
I wouldn't say I exploited them.
Good. Don't.
It'll be our little secret.
Now, where are we with Missy?
You leave Missy alone.
Mom!
Help! I can't get out!
Missy!
Why are you sleeping?
You should be selling.
No!
[narrator] My mother never sold makeup again.