What’s up, guys.
Sean Nalewanyj here; www.SeanNal.com-www.BodyTransformationTruth.com.
A bit of a different video today and what I wanted to talk about here was the question
of: How much will having a lean and muscular body affect your success with women?
A lot of guys that are just starting out, they this idea that they’re just going to
hit the gym, they’re going to get shredded and then women are just going to start chasing
after them from every angle.
Now, the truth is that it really doesn’t work that way and I wanted to make this video
just to give you a more, sort of, realistic idea on this subject.
Now, this is actually a very loaded topic and some of the stuff that I get into here
about, you know, sort of evolution and psychology it might sound a bit weird but I usually don’t
make videos about this sort of stuff and I find it really interesting, so just bear with
me.
So, first off, always keep in mind; nothing that you do in terms of your appearance is
going to make any difference at all for you when it comes to attracting women if you’re
not a socially active person who regularly goes out and meets new people, period.
If you fit the stereotype of the lonesome bodybuilder, and I’ve been this guys before
in the past so I fully understand it, you know where fitness basically consumes most
of your time and focus, and where you’re constantly working on yourself without actually
going out then having a good body is going to be next to useless for you, okay.
Temporary periods of single minded focus are fine if you’re trying to excel in a particular
area, but if as a long term lifestyle you’re not regularly going out, meeting new people,
getting into social situations and actively putting yourself out there then nothing is
going to happen for you, okay.
Women are not just going to magically appear on your doorstep and your social life will
pretty much be nothing more than night after night of Netlix and chill, except that you’ll
be doing it alone.
So number one; an attractive body is only as good as how socially active you are.
Secondly, as an overall statement, and I’m just speaking in general here because there
are exception which I’ll get to shortly, but overall a lean and muscular body, or just
having good looks in general is only as good as the way in which you carry yourself.
So in other words, a woman might find you attractive initially because of your looks
but if she doesn’t also find your behavior attractive, then a pretty high percentage
of the time, your look are not going to save you.
Now, we can go really deep on this and this is sort of the weird evolutionary part, but
basically men and women have different reproductive strategies, they’re attracted to different
things in the opposite sex.
Men are primarily attracted, at least initially, to a woman’s physical appearance and that’s
because it’s an indicator of health and fertility.
Whereas for women they are attracted to visual appearances as well, but they’re also very
attracted to behavior and personality, and that’s because it’s an indicator of social
status and resources which throughout evolutionary history was very important for a woman survival
and for the survival of her offspring.
So it didn’t matter if you could produce a healthy offspring if you didn’t have the
social status and the resources to keep that offspring alive then you’re really still
were not going to be much use.
And all of this is related to the fact that most of the human evolution took place in
hunt or gather society where we pretty much lived in, fifty to a hundred percent tribes,
in very harsh competitive environments.
Now in today’s modern world which is, you know, very new in human history, it’s pretty
much a blink of an eye, most women don’t actually need a man’s status or his resources
for survival.
But again her brain is still biologically set up to respond to that.
So if you look really good but you don’t behave in an attractive way it’s still only
going to get you so far.
And what is the behavioral trait she’s mostly looking at?
Just like most women will tell you, it’s basically confidence, okay.
Confidence is attractive to women because evolutionary speaking it’s her best way
of determining your status, your overall place in the tribe so to speak.
So, when you’re interacting with a female if you come off as really nervous and needy
and approval seeking, that you’re really trying to get something from her and she can
tell that you care a lot about the outcome then it implies to her that you’re probably
coming from a place of lack and that you’re probably of lower status.
Whereas on the other hand, if you’re relaxed you’re not needy, you’re willing to walk
away and you’re getting value rather than trying to take value form her, it implies
to her that you’re coming from a place of abundance and that you likely are of high
status.
So while you’re mostly responding to her facial symmetry and her hair, her skin, her
hip to waist ratio, et cetera, she’s not just looking at the fact that you have lean
abs and muscular shoulders, okay.
That’s part of it, it helps.
But she’s also looking at your eye contact, your vocal tonality, your facial expressions,
your posture, she’s looking at how reactive you are, how you carry yourself around other
people, how other people carry themselves around you.
So, she’s sizing up not just your genetic value but also your social value.
And most women won’t even be consciously aware that this is happening, it’s just
automatic and she’ll either feel attracted or she won’t as a result of it because it’s
just how her brain is set up.
So, this is basically just a very long winded way of saying that being in great shape will
make you more attractive to women on the looks side of the equation, but you have to keep
in mind that this is just one part of the equation for them.
And if you want to maximize your success with women then you also need to work on developing
your core confidence and your social skills to go along with it, which is a whole other
topic altogether.
Now I did mention that there were exceptions here, I’m just speaking in general, everybody’s
different and there are going to be women out there who value looks more so than other
women do, and there are women who will find the guy who has, you know, a great body to
be very attractive, pretty much just based on that alone.
They just have like, a thing for it.
So, if you’re in awesome shape and you’re a social guy who goes out a lot and meets
a lot of women, then you’re inevitably going to cross paths with that subset of women and
you’ll have much easier time attracting them without necessarily needing to be, you
know, the most confident or charismatic guy.
And the other thing I’d mention is that even though you probably won’t be able to
attract most women just based on your looks alone, it still does make it easier in the
sense that women will be more receptive to you initially, if they’re physically attracted
to you.
They’ll be a bit more forgiving on the behavior side, whereas if you’re out of shape, you’re
not well dressed, you’re not groomed well, then your margin for error is going to be
a lot smaller and your behavior is going to need to be a lot more, you know, sort of rock
solid for you to get the same success.
And the final point that I’d make is that the degree to which being in great shape is
going to help you individually, percentage wise, it highly depends on what type of shape
you’re in right now.
So if you take a guy who is really overweight and he loses the excess fat and now he has
a lean and athletic body then his overall attractiveness to women for him is going to
up by quite a bit proportionally.
Whereas if you take a guy who’s already 12% body fat and he goes down to a very lean
8%, that’s not going to make nearly as much difference.
So going from blatantly out of shape to in-shape, that is going to help you out a lot overall.
It’s actually the quickest fix you can make to improve your success with women, but going
form in-shape to being really in-shape is only going to make a minor difference.
So, just some thoughts for you guys here, if you’re wanting to maximize your success
with women then you absolutely should maximize your appearance as best as you can.
And being in great shape is part of that, it definitely will help.
But keep in mind that it’s not a magic bullet.
You’re not just going to get shredded and instantly be surrounded with women.
You still need to go out regularly.
You need to develop your core confidence and your social skills to go along with your appearance
otherwise you’re still not going to get very far.
So thanks for watching guys.
if you want to get the complete step-by-step plan that will help you build muscle, lose
fat and maximize the looks side of the equation for yourself, the meal plans, the workouts,
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Talk to you guys again soon.