Welcome to bike day.
We’re taking a look at the unsung heroes of the road.
The two wheeled warriors we call
Cyclists
Just...In-in a minute.
We’ll take a look at the cyclists in a minute. There’s just..
These blokes are hogging the road.
It’s. Yeah, nah it’s a bit frustrating because the speed limit is 60
And we’re doing 30.
Ah, look, I really wanna talk about the FUN.
The FUN of riding bikes
Getting exercise
Fresh air
And the positive aspects--
Okay here’s a fun one.
[Cyclist] “Get off me bike and walk up the stairs?"
[Cyclist] "Nup! Why would I do that?”
This is so unnecessary but so impressive.
Aw-hoh f#%k me dead, she’s tried to touch him.
She’s like “take me now. Give me a dinky.”
Now we’re in traffic,
This bloke wants to head to the side, smart idea,
OHHH he’s gone tits up.
I don’t even understand what happened.
It looks like the bike betrayed him.
That must hurt more than the tumble,
Being betrayed by ya transportation companion.
He’s doing the right thing, he’s pulled his bike out the way,
And some blokes gather to talk about it all.
Hands on hips Guy is definitely disappointed.
He’s saying “first the ya learn when you’re a kid, wear a helmet"
"Where's ya fucken helmet mate?"
"Are you too cool?"
"There’s nothing cool about ya cerebellum"
"Splattered on the bitumen. Oi Crystal, come here."
"Look at this guy."
"Thinks he too cool for a helmet.”
The cyclist replies “Okay, can we chat about this later.”
Nah, he’s pissed off.
He’s outta there.
He’s got places to be.
Horses.
The ancestors to the pushbike.
A friendly cyclist is coming up to make amends.
GRAGH. BITEY BITE! Right on the forearm.
Bloody Pharlap sends his regards.
[Horse] "This is for putting us out of business!"
Hydration will clear up horse teeth punctures
No worries.
Here’s a gaggle of cyclists,
The bloke on the red bike is feeling sleepy—
Oh his mate flies over him.
I reckon they meant to do it.
Acrobatic Cycling is a thing.
His mate looks fair dinkum acrobatic to me.
I do reckon cyclists get a bad rap.
Sure, they clog up the non-bike lane roads
On their way to get smashed avo toast and a mocha from the cafe
BUT
Ya have to admire their bravery to ride absolutely anywhere
Even next to an Ostrich.
This group is in the Ostrich Leg of the race
Which is where they have to avoid being attacked by a giant bird.
It’s one of the lesser known stages of the Tour De France,
Rarely broadcast, but
An integral part of the race
Steeped in tradition.
We should always respect Ostrich’s on the road
And the cyclists
They’re chasing as well.
The Kangaroo Leg is also rarely broadcast--
BAM,
Shitmixed!
Wowee, Richo.
You can hear Skippy yell
“Say G’day to Destination F#%KED for me. See ya.”
Overall you do have to control yourself when you’re in a car.
Something about being in a little seat with a wheel makes everyone too angry.
Road Rage isn’t the answer people,
It's not the answer.
The cyclist is doing the right thing, walking away.
Oh the truck driver wants an actual fight.
Against a guy with a helmet. OHH!
The cyclist
Says “just cause I’m wearing lycra"
"It doesn’t mean I’m a soft cock."
"I’m a simple man on his way"
"To get a pumpkin feta salad and a green matcha.” Fair enough.
Look after yourselves out there
And each other.
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