(playful music)
- [Interviewer] Next.
- Goog.
- Let me guess: a question that has absolutely nothing
to do with coronavirus, or the quarantine, or--
- It's about coronavirus.
- It is?
- Yes.
- Really?
- Yes.
- Okay, let's hear it.
(clears throat)
- Coronavirus called Budweiser virus in Mexico?
- DIY haircut.
- Using a pair of clippers, carefully, whoa.
- Shave my head.
- Yeah, shave your head.
- Face masks?
- Wearing a face mask isn't just about protecting yourself,
it is about protecting others, so I think--
- Prada face mask.
- Really?
- Gucci face mask.
- Upgrading Wi-Fi?
- Might I suggest a Google router?
- Upgrading neighbor's Wi-Fi?
- Wow.
- Firestorm.
- Yeah, this isn't the apocalypse you've been prepping for.
- Animal traps?
- Just stay home and watch TV.
- Monk ammunition.
- What about Bear Grylls?
Do you like Bear Grylls?
- Can you train a plane?
- Tiger King?
- What a wild series.
- Episode two.
- Phew!
So same time tomorrow?
- Three, four, five, six, seven.
Special interviews.
Behind the scenes.
Cast Instagram accounts.
- Okay.
- Carole Baskin murdered husband, drug cartel connections.
- Ukulele chords.
- Here's C, G, and D.
- And one chord songs?
- "Put the Lime in the Coconut."
- Ukulele amp!
- I'm very sorry for your neighbors.
- Oil prices negative?
- It's supply and demand.
See, when supply is too high--
- Pay me to take oil.
- Not how it works.
- I have like a whole room I'm not using.
- Sourdough starter.
- This is fun.
Sourdough starter is a living thing.
- How to feed sourdough starter.
- Just water and flour every eight to 12 hours.
- What to name sourdough starter.
- Look, when I said living thing--
- College fund for sourdough starter.
- Twins with two dads.
- Growing a beard.
- Just let it grow.
You might have some bald spots, but, whoa.
- Shave my beard?
- Shave your beard.
- $1200?
- That's your stimulus check.
It's to help with food, and rent, and other essentials.
- Gambling on Marblelympics.
- Essentials.
- $1200 face mask.
- Come on.
- $1200 router.
- People!
- Chicken coop.
- Let me guess: $1200 chicken coop.
- Stealing a chicken coop.
- Not that creative.
- Small business loans.
- Here's your application.
Can I ask what your business is?
- Yeah, it's just some Mom and Pop shop.
- Shake shack.
- Yeah, just some Mom and Pop shack.
- Seven p.m. noises why?
- To celebrate healthcare workers.
- Seven p.m. start of The Purge?
- The Purge hasn't started.
- When is The Purge?
- You want The Purge?
- I can't
take it, not being on - Watch the purge on TV.
- The Purge anymore.
- Stay out!
- Wall of China, great, who said?
- That's just what it's called.
- Wall of China, Rotten Tomatoes.
- What is TikTok?
- Oh, please, don't summon him!
- Viral check.
♪ Namaste that force ♪
(upbeat hip-hop music)
- Should I do something?
- He'll wear himself out.
- Don't let this flop!
- Second wave.
- Of the 1918 Spanish Flu,
caused in part by public celebration
of the end of World War I, killed 10 times as many people
as the first wave, more people than died in World War I.
- Feminism?
- Oh, sorry, one track mind lately.
- Hope in America.
- You dumb idiot.
You think it's your right to risk other people's lives?
What kind of person are you even?
- Free Joe Exotic.
- When is The Purge, actually?
- Scared.
- You're not alone.
- Lonely.
- We all are.
- Impatient.
- Look, I get it, but we have to be patient
for a while longer, or we risk losing more lives.
A lot more lives.
- Horny.
- Hey, great news.
I'm the internet.
(upbeat hip-hop music).
- Do this dance, y'all!
I wanna see you try it!
Charli D'amilio, I'm looking at you!
Come on, guys, 900 more followers and I can go live!