Keanu Reeves has been dubbed the "Internet's boyfriend," and his infinite acts of kindness
have endeared him to legions of fans.
This begs the question: Why hasn't the handsome actor settled down?
"I'm stupid, okay?"
"Okay."
Here are a few reasons the actor might never walk down the aisle.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Perhaps Reeves doesn't want to get married because the very thought of starting a family
brings back sad memories.
The actor was once very much in love.
According to Paper, Reeves met David Lynch's assistant Jennifer Syme in 1998 at a party
for Reeves' band, Dogstar.
They immediately hit it off, and she eventually got pregnant.
The couple planned to name their little girl Ava.
But in late 1999, a month before she was due, Syme's pregnancy resulted in a stillborn.
According to People, the couple couldn't deal with the loss and broke up a few weeks later,
though they remained close friends.
Then, in April 2000, Syme tragically died at the wheel of her car.
According to MTV News, she was on her way home from a party at Marilyn Manson's house.
As People reported,
"[She] sideswiped three parked cars, rolled over several times and was thrown from the
car."
The magazine goes on to reveal,
"In her car police found prescribed antidepressants and two rolled-up dollar bills with 'a white
powdery substance' inside."
At the time, a friend told People,
"[Reeves] is finding it very, very difficult to cope with her death."
In an interview with Parade magazine in 2006, Reeves admitted:
"Grief changes shape, but it never ends.
People have a misconception that you can deal with it and say, 'It's gone, and I'm better.'
They're wrong.
When the people you love are gone, you're alone."
Here's something that might get in the way of Keanu Reeves getting married: Technically,
he may already be married.
Appearing on The Talk in January 2019, Reeves revealed:
"Yeah, once in a while, I'll get a text: 'Hello, husband.'"
Wait, what?
He's referring to none other than Winona Ryder, who co-starred with his in Bram Stoker's Dracula.
Well, it turns out Keanu and Winona may have actually tied the knot on the set of the 1992
film.
Ryder shed more light on the situation in an August 2018 interview with Entertainment
Weekly, revealing:
"I'm convinced we really did get married because it was a real Romanian priest.
And we did a master where he did the whole thing."
For reals, though?
Indeed!
Speaking to The Guardian, director Francis Ford Coppola admitted he wasn't pleased with
the first version of the scene… so he came up with a plan:
"[I thought that] having the real wedding ceremony as it might be in that religion [Greek
Orthodox Christianity] would be beautiful."
So yeah, he brought in an actual priest.
Coppola goes on to say,
"In a sense, when we were all done, we realized that Keanu and Winona really are married as
a result of this scene and this ceremony."
So romantic!
And so weird.
It sounds like the actor may have given up hope on getting married, or ever having children.
"I love you."
"No!"
"I love you…"
"No!"
"I love you so much!"
The year 2017 might have been a particularly low period for the 47 Ronin star, as his perception
of love seemed entirely grim during his interview with Esquire:
"It's too late.
It's over.
I'm 52.
I'm not going to have any kids."
Calling himself a cliché, he declared,
"Aging.
I'm just starting to get better at it.
Just the amount of stuff you have to do before you're dead…It's just, 'Oh my God.
OK.
Where did the time go?
How come things are changing?
How much time do I have left?
What didn't I do?'"
And if that statement isn't quite enough to get the waterworks flowing, consider this.
In 2019, Reeves got remarkably honest at a press conference.
According to Star2, he was asked what love meant to him, and he replied,
"You mean romantic love?
You know, I'm the lonely guy.
I don't have anyone in my life.
But if it does occur, I would respect and love the other person; hopefully it'll happen
for me."
Keanu Reeves may be hard to get close to, quite literally.
In June 2019, the Matrix star made headlines for a rather bizarre reason: Twitter users
started pointing out that he doesn't touch women when he poses for photos.
CNN caught wind of the phenomenon and compiled various fan responses.
A typical tweet read:
"possibility: he's reacting to the Me too movement by realizing that hey, wait, maybe
women want more space, and changing his actions?"
Trendspotters at CNN went for broke and declared that...
"Keanu Reeves is officially a national treasure."
Well, if that's true, Reeves was apparently oblivious to the fact.
The same month these endearing photo moments were making headlines, the actor stopped to
talk to People as he walked the red carpet for the Toy Story 4 premiere.
"You've been dubbed the Internet's boyfriend.
Everyone is just kind of gushing over you.
You didn't know that yet?"
"No.
That's wacky."
It is rather wacky, isn't it?
Perhaps Keanu's luck in love will take a turn for the better.
In 2018, The Daily Mail reported that Reeves was spotted on a date with a mystery woman.
Claiming that he was seen having a romantic Italian dinner in Hollywood, the tabloid perhaps
overstated the situation, writing that:
"It's not everyday that the Lebanon native is seen smiling from ear to ear...But it looks
like a blossoming relationship has given The Lake House actor a bit of pep in his step."
How sexy.
In 2014, and obviously in a meditative state of mind, Reeves told the German website Bunte:
"I still don't have a family or kids, but I was just unlucky."
Reflecting on the very concept of love, Reeves went on to say:
"Social differences, standing, where you come from are still unique to every culture.
But hopefully, love conquers all."
So much to chew on there, and it's certainly an optimistic point of view.
Keep in mind we're now several years away from the birth of that "Sad Keanu" meme:
"There's a sort of mythology that surrounds you.
That you're sad."
"Oh yeah."
"There's this whole 'Sad Keanu' thing, you know."
Here's hoping Reeve's jovial spirits are here to stay, regardless of whether or not he gets
married.
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