hey how you doing you good-looking
person you your beautiful soul
you absolutely encouraging piece of work
it's really it's really good to be here
I just want to talk to you guys about
depression if it sucks and trust me I
know how it feels it's like a zapping of
your energy your heart it's slowing you
cannot breathe their energy is gone it
it just really sucks
one of the most biggest difficulties I
would say this year with everything and
YouTube is I've always had depression
and anxiety and things like that but
this year it's difficult because I've
gotten bigger on YouTube and I'm not
trying to point blame or anything like
that or be that guy but I've had to to
have it to slow down and take a couple
to take days off because of some people
I don't know how that sounds but there's
they're they're being mean I know I know
I am like a sensitive emotional person
and it's like people get behind a
username and they think that they can't
be found out so they think it's a no
hold holds bar to just be the meanest
person that they did say the nastiest
things that they can but this is a lot
about not just that person but what
they're going through in their life
and that's what I always try to keep a
perspective of if somebody is treating
you this way and they're basically you
should always hold yourself to a higher
standard I think because how you treat
someone when they don't know who you are
does a lot tell us a lot about your
character to yourself and
psychologically I'm really big into
studying like psychopathy and and things
like that you always want to have these
affirmations like when I wake up in the
morning and I got these affirmations
written everywhere that say day by day
in every way I'm becoming more and more
successful in things like that and I
like I'm I'm like listening to
motivation because psychologically the
way it affects you it builds you up I'm
really careful about the people that I
let into my life I'm really careful
about the things that I say even excuse
me even though sometimes I say like the
silliest things and I mean I've heard
people just feeling this in my life and
not meant to I don't think I've ever
intentionally ever ever hurt somebody's
feelings I was never a person that could
do revenge
I don't do the revenge thing if somebody
does me wrong if somebody does me wrong
it gives me like a fire to fuels me to
do more and better in my career and
everyone like there's a lot of people
better just mean to me and and youtubers
my fellow bredrin you probably
understand what I'm talking about it's
like they think that we don't read these
horrible things that they're saying and
these false things and these lies just
to hurt and but we do we do just because
we don't respond to it doesn't mean we
don't read it and it doesn't mean
because we're you
tubers it doesn't hurt us we're normal
people and those things are very
difficult and those things have
prevented me from making content I mean
today today's content is hard to put out
because it's I feel super vulnerable
about it but taking you guys behind the
scenes of my mind is one of the things
that do here on this channel being as
close as I am to you guys in us being
this family that I've created of slack
minded people is really important to me
because I don't have anybody else that I
can talk to this is it you know and it's
super important to me but
I've been absolutely drained this year
and up until this year I've not ever
ever done anything that I was proud of
but then when we went on Inside Edition
and it was for suicide prevention that
that's a CBS thing and then I got to
tell my grandparents about it and seeing
their reaction and how proud they were
that was the first time since I'm since
I've been on YouTube that I've done
something that I'm proud of and to be
able to do that it lets me know that I'm
going in the right direction and doing
the right thing and I remember back at
the beginning of the year into the year
I was less than 10,000 subscribers and
the hate ran or empathy like people
would just down me talk bad about me I
mean they're always there you're always
gonna have haters on everything and it's
those haters that give you the give me
the fuel and energy to keep progressing
we're now the biggest that we've ever
been on the Internet and it's not just
the reptilian aim that is big I take
with it the rip squad name our community
and it's it's so important and I just
wanted to talk to you guys about
depression and fighting through it and
to keep on prevailing keep on being
consistent using this consecrated
dedication in willpower to just press
through to do it to keep doing it it do
it every day despite what everyone may
say because I have people today that
tell me that I suck and that my channel
is gonna die and I'm not I don't deserve
it and blah blah blah this and they were
saying that back when I had a hundred
subscribers if I were to quit when I had
a hundred subscribers and listen to them
they would have won and that's something
that I'll never do I will keep on going
forward I will keep pressing forward
because no I feel like I've been given
this
talent to do this thing and I try to use
it the best I can to show people that
just because somebody says that you
can't do something does not matter you
most certainly can do that thing a point
case and example I have a lot of hidden
symbolism and meaning in a lot of my
content so you might want to go back and
watch it and really pay attention
because you could be to be like oh my
god I didn't see that before but nearly
every single one of my videos a lot of
my content it all has like double triple
meanings like I and I don't try to make
it purposely where you can't see it like
I want you to see it because I want you
to learn the lesson because I can't you
can't just to me you can't tell somebody
a direct message and then to just get it
like because they'll be like no no I'm
not doing that you kind of have to just
point input to the direction of it kind
of like how the Buddha said the finger
that points to the moon is not the moon
and a lot of people get confused so by
thinking the fingers the moon do you
understand if you don't understand let
me know in the comments below and I'll
try to help you out but anyways point
case an example is everybody's talking
about the MGK M&M food the beef and I am
just not really like on either side I
I'm doing my thing right so I found a
controversial picture that was sent to
me where it was a clip from the
Wikipedia and it had mg K's rap devil
and Eminem's kill shot on it and I knew
what I was doing we're not posted that I
posted the thing on Twitter but I
already had the video done but I wanted
to give a platform to talk and build
discussion so I posted it and I said
who won the battle obviously pthis here
and it was a in the Wikipedia picture of
the songwriters and the songwriters that
showed Colson and his producer and then
the other songwriter cited just so
Marshall Mathers
so MGK is not as big as Eminem so a lot
of people don't know his real name and I
knew this and that was the whole point
of the troll was to post this because
this picture had been rotating around
and people were like oh my god educate
it and write a song but you know because
nobody knows his real name because
nobody knows him and it was just that's
just a double meaning like a triple
meaning really because the picture did
this it said I'm opposed to Spitzer
because I know that people that are
prone to negativity are gonna jump on it
and they're gonna say and there are
still people common and even though
after I've explained it Coulson's MGK
Snape duh your your your insert any
graphic word that you could possibly
think of and I knew it and I thought
that they would have caught on by now
that I do this in all my content so not
only that there's so much about it that
points to the obvious
why what I that I was trolling for the
teaching experience of showing you that
you're perpetuating negativity in hopes
that you'll realize your error and fix
it yourself so so many people just
started being negative on it
then I posted the video that already had
made explaining like yeah and I'm not
for either this was for this and it
completely went over everyone's head not
know that there's probably just really
immature people out there and people
that just don't care and people that
whatever but it was the case and
unfortunately it did go over a lot of
people's head and I don't think that my
content is that hard to understand don't
think I'm I'm such that of an intense
content creator that the messages go
between the lines I'm not that great of
a a vocalist a word or two is it's not a
Rubik's Cube is basically what I'm
saying like it's kind of like it right
there in front of you like you you you
you you got trolled and you can see it
but it was for a good purpose and for
those of you that did catch on and you
seen that oh my god I feel so I feel so
silly like if you if you commented on
that and you said and you called me me
dumb for not knowing
MGK his name then you are you fell for
it because then you're like you went and
you were negative and it was kind of
like a catch-all trap to show you that
you were being negative because the
video was already made and then it's
like BAM like right there like and then
I would want you to be like oh no I am I
am so wrong I was such a I jumped and
was so mean and now I feel so silly and
but now turns out that people won't even
admit their mistakes and stuff like that
but this is there are people that did
and did apologize I was like you know
what I was you were right I see what you
did I was - I did jump to be negative
that's my bad and that's what I like to
do but
I'm gonna go ahead and end it there
because this video is getting long and I
just wanted to give you guys a quick
little thing about depression and
everything so I'm interested in what you
guys think leave your interesting
comments below thank you have a good day