Language or verbal communication is a tool that we use to communicate, but
it is also easy to miscommunicate with language today we will focus on
how using language can result in miscommunication specifically
why language barriers exist, common language barriers, and then some simple suggestions for
overcoming language barriers. It is helpful to review David Berlo's
SMCR model were a sender encodes a message, that goes through a channel,
that is then decoded by the receiver, who translate that into meeting in her mind.
Language then is used by both the sender encoding the message, and the receiver
decoding the message meaning that misunderstandings due to language
are not always the sender's fault, before communicating the sender must first
try to figure out what exactly she wants to say what is the message and then we have to
encoder our thoughts translate them into words to convey our meaning unfortunately
some of us start speaking before we even get our thoughts in order,
it is worse than what we have to say is important to us or when we're emotionally involved
sometimes we don't even know the words to communicate what we want to say.
In fact the words we want might not even exist in our language, then we venture to say a few words in
those may not even be close to what we want to say, for some people we have to hear what
we're saying in order to determine if that's what we really mean in my case,
for example I find that my brain seems to work better with my mouth is moving
talking actually helps me think once those first few words leave our mouth
we might even want to take that back but as you know communication is
irreversible. Those words have already been translated to the receiver
who then decode those words back into meaning in her brain,
and if our egos get involved many times we can even admit to the other person
that we didn't mean what we just said and once communication breaks down it's
hard to repair it. Miscommunications can lead to disastrous consequences, in
interpersonal communication it can result in hurt feelings,
broken relationships, bruised reputations, and worst.
One major causes of miscommunication and the one that we'll focus on now
is that we rely on language or words to communicate, yet it is the words themselves
that often cause the problem we encoder thoughts and feelings into words, and decode the words of others
into our own thoughts and feelings.
But let's turn next to word barriers and the mostobvious is based upon the principle that
words are culturally bound, a word naming one thing in one culture in one language,
and something entirely different in another,a Hindi saying
is that "A normal word in one language is an abusive word in another language",
but beyond unintentionally offending someone culturally bound words can cause confusion.
For example, in traditional British English the term "moot point", means a point to discuss,
in American English we use the term "moot point" to mean that something is not worth discussing
it has no practical value it is a "moot point", confusion due to cultural issues is obvious
but let's turn to another cause miscommunication, and that is that we assume.
Playwright Oscar Wilde observed that "when you assume you make an ass out of you and me",
unfortunately we assume much too often, many word barriers are based upon this assumption
realize that language is imprecise,it is ambiguous or vague it has been said that the average word in the
English language has five different meanings if I'm thinking one definition
and you were thinking of another, we have a problem the American Cancer Society,
noted that some US residents smoke a moderate amount well others are heavy
smokers, but what does that mean. What is a heavy smoker a quick search online reveal the answers from
10 cigarettes a day to over 60, wow no wonder we miscommunicated we all have
different meanings for that one word heavy, by the way the American Cancer Society
defines a heavy smoker smoking more than 20 cigarettes, or one pack a day.
We also tend to be what one of my colleagues calls "linguistically lazy" we tend to use the same words
over and over without finding the best word to describe what we want to say
how many different ways can we say happy, is there a difference between a static,
and content yet we continually use happy to describe our emotional state
not only is imprecise language a problem here but we also make the situation
worse because we are too lazy to find the best word.
In the 1989 movie Dead Poets Society, English teacher John Keating advise his
students to avoid using the word very, because it is lazy a man he said is not very tired, he is exhausted
don't use very sad use morose, he concludes that language was invented for one reason
to whoo women, and in that endeavor laziness will not work.
Another barrier related to this is bypassing also called equivocation, when the same word holds
different meanings to different people, lets say you and I are going to the movies together and I tell you that I will
get to the theater "early" you say you also get there "early" I arrive 15 minutes before
the show starts and start tapping my feet you are late, when you breeze in two
minutes before the movie starts I'm very upset because our meanings of the word
"early" bypassed each other so who gets the blame for this communication me,
because I wasn't specific or you because you didn't ask for specifics.
We also tend to take shortcuts when we use words again assuming that others
know the same shortcuts we use slang, sometimes referring to something good as
"sick" for example, we may use jargon which is language used for a particular activity,
or by a particular group of people, stat for example in the medical profession means immediately
in law enforcement GSW stands for gunshot wound now jargon can be very helpful
in getting the point across quickly to another person but that's only if that person knows the jargon
if not the jargon just confuses the issue.
As we use language to communicate emotions we may not always consider the
impact of that language on others, when our emotions get involved it's very hard to encode a
message and if the word has strong meaning or emotional value to the receiver,
the receiver may actually stop listening for a while this especially holds true
for bias language such as language based upon race, sex, sexual orientation, age, and ability
the list goes on also profanity obscenities can be hot buttons for many people.
We also tend to speak in absolutes, we present information as if there are no
alternative views, an example this is polarization which is the tendency to describe the world in
terms that extremes or polar opposites, we speak about things in a dichotomous
fashion as either black or white with no mention of any gray areas. You call someone stupid
or smart, but there are shades in between, again sometimes we don't have the words to
describe these gradations, what word would you use to describe someone who fits here
on the scale so we almost have no choice but to use extreme language
this leaves us to a very similar concept at static evaluation.
I'll admit for example my first year in college wasn't my best, but that doesn't
necessarily mean that I am a bad student today static evaluation implies that things
don't change but as the cliche goes change is inevitable.
Another related word barrier is allness or over generalization, you might think that this is polarization
to the extreme using some form at the words always and never as in all women are bad drivers,
and all men are jerks using this language often puts people on the defensive,
semantics its Wendell Johnson caution that always,and never
are two words you should always remember, never to use.
Now this next one if I've said it once I've said it a million times,
is hyperbole okay maybe not a million, while hyperbole or exaggeration is used extensively in
advertising we use it in conversation as well when we say we have enough food
to feed an army for example, which is most likely an overstatement, a hyperbole
we also use language to understate or overstate oftentimes we understate when
we don't want to hurt someone else's feelings.
For example if a child is being bratty and we don't want to offend we may use
the word precocious, we will often use euphemisms which are polite expressions
used in the place of words or phrases that otherwise might be considered harsh,
or unpleasant to hear like saying "we put a pet to sleep".
How can we overcome some of these language barriers, well here are just a few brief tips many of which are
plain common sense which as we know is not always so common,
first be other-oriented we tend to be egocentric, we don't think about the other person
when we're choosing our words, secondly try not to assume clarify repeat paraphrase
both for your benefit and the benefit of others.
Remember the K.I.S.S strategy keep it short and simple, don't ramble or go on with a whole lot of extra details,
you may want to think before you speak, sometimes after thinking things through
you may decide not to speak, there's a saying that "the kindest word in all the world
is the unkind word unsaid", just because you can say something doesn't mean that you should.
If you think about what you say before you speak you'll have the chance to
organize your thoughts to rehearse your words to evaluate the situation, and then hopefully
not say something stupid, this means that you may need to plan your message
would details are necessary to communicate what's the best way to
organize this message, and what's the best way for this particular person
and of course you want to choose the appropriate words to communicate your meaning
don't be linguistically lazy.
Finally listen and this applies to both when you are sending a message or speaking
as well as when you are on the receiving end at the message or listening.
Processing time here, Does the responsibility of communicating effectively with language or words rest
primarily with the sender? Which of these language barriers is most problematic for you
as a speaker? How about as a listener? and What other recommendation would you
give to reduce communication barriers associated with language?
No matter how you look at it miscommunication is an inevitable part of life
and you can never truly eliminated, but by paying more attention to the words that you use,
you should be able to improve your effectiveness good verbal communication.