How do you get off the hamster wheel and get on a wheel of hope?
Earlier this week I received an email.
In fact,
I receive many emails every week from people asking me questions like that.
And the question always goes like, I've been applying for so many jobs.
You know,
I have been trying to get myself out there and get my resume out there and I
just want to be in a better position.
I'm living paycheck to paycheck and I am uninspired by what I do,
but I'm trying to do something different
and I have submitted hundreds of applications and I am not getting any
interviews and it's just a hamster wheel. What do I do?
And I would say that if you're in this situation and you're listening to this
right now,
I want to acknowledge you that you recognize that a change has to happen.
But most times when I talk to people, you know,
sometimes they reach out to me and I engage them in conversation.
And what I hear is that most people don't realize the cost of staying where
they're at right now. You know,
on the surface of it, they tell me they want to change, right?
But in the end they say "it's not that bad" and
the danger of it's not that bad. I mean, I get it there.
There's so much going on in our careers.
There's so much stress and pressures that we face,
especially as women in the career path that we have to cope with it somehow.
You know, and one of the coping mechanisms that people have is to say to
themselves "it's not that bad" that well "it could be worse." You know,
a conversation like that.
And that mindset is what's keeping you stuck if you have to cope,
and I understand that there has to be there, you have to cope somehow.
But there are other ways to cope.
There are other ways to recognize that a change has to be made.
And the best way to recognize that is by looking at the future of a possibility
where you can have, a future that is one that you desire,
not one that is told to you that you should have. But one that your heart,
your inner, your core is telling you that you want,
your inner voice is telling you that you want.
So it's better to connect with that dream of a future,
an improved future that has possibility to you then to
focus on trying to cope and cope with what's currently happening in your
situation right now. By telling yourself it's not that bad.
Because communication of "it's not that bad" will lead you to accept
the status quo for what it is.
And the status quo is the most dangerous place to be because the
status quo means that nothing's going to change.
So ask yourself, you know,
instead of saying "it's not that bad," or "it could be worse." Ask yourself
what's
going to happen one year from now,
five years from now or even six months from now, if absolutely nothing
changes in my career, if absolutely nothing changes in my life,
what's going to happen.
If I just continue to have more of what I have right now,
what is my life going to be like? How was it going to affect my family?
How is it going to affect my kids?
How is it going to affect my wellbeing, my mental wellbeing,
my physical wellbeing, everything.
Because your career affects more than just you. And if you have a family,
if you're supporting your family, if you have a spouse or significant other,
chances are you're doing it more than just for yourself.
It's for your family as well.
So think about the bigger picture of who your journey affects,
right? Because sometimes we're really bad
at investing in ourselves and I get that as a woman,
I used to always want to do everything for everyone else.
I've always wanted to support other people.
I wanted to make sure that everyone around me, all my friends were doing well.
And I always was that one that lended that helping ear.
And it's easy to invest in other people,
especially if you're a mom and you've had kids. It's easy to invest in them.
And it's so difficult to put that same investment in yourself because you know,
and then you had that conversation. Well, moms always go last, right?
I always have to go last because you know I care about the people I care about.
But remember what people say when you get on an airplane,
put your mask on first before you help another person,
put their oxygen mask on first. And the same thing is true in your career.
If you don't invest in yourself, how can you help other people?
If you don't invest in yourself,
how can you expect other people to invest in themselves? You are an
example to them. If you don't invest in yourself, not now, then when,
if you're not going to do it now, then when are you going to do it?
If you're making if-then statements, I know I'll invest in myself when I
make this amount of money,
I'll invest in myself when I turn around a better paycheck.
If you're not doing it now,
you're not gonna do it then as well because there's always going to be something
that comes in your way. There's always going to be a new expense.
There's always going to be something
else that you can do that's going to distract you from that investment you can
make in yourself.
And an investment in yourself is the best investment you could ever make.
It's better than an investment in your home,
it's better than an investment in your car,
it's better than an investment in your work environment.
It's the best investment you can ever make is the one in yourself because you
are the one where all the power is. If you invest in yourself,
improving yourself, improving your mindset, improving your skill set,
all of that investment will pay dividends for you in the years to come.
And when you become a better version of yourself because of that investment,
you are an example to your kids. You're an example to your family,
and you are better able to provide them because you become a better version of
yourself.
You can do things that you need to do to have the future that you want.
That's the order that it has to come. You can't have first.
We desire things and it's okay to desire things.
It's okay to desire a better home, a better car, you know, a better life.
It's okay to desire things.
It's okay to want to have things that you don't have right now,
but that can't be the first thing you strive for, right? It's not in that order.
Success comes in the order of becoming, you become the first person first,
and then you can do what you need to do,
and then you can have as a result of doing right.
So that's why the investment in yourself is the most important investment you
can make.