We talked to some experts from the finest steakhouses in the land, and they told us
some hard rules to follow when dining in these special restaurants. From how to dress and how
to order, this expert advice will give you confidence next time you visit a steakhouse.
You can't just roll out of bed like you're going to your freshman year dining hall and
step into a fine steakhouse. Flip flops, shorts, sleeveless shirts,
and other beach-worthy attire aren't going to cut it at a steakhouse.
But you don't need to be fitted for a sport
coat just because you have a dinner reservation, either.
Matt King, chef and President of Culinary for Smith and Wollensky,
a steakhouse with nine restaurants in cities around America, said:
"Business casual attire is still encouraged at steakhouses today.
But gone are the Mad Men-era days of strict suit and tie protocol."
Bottom line: You don't need to wear a suit to go into a steakhouse — though no one's turning
you away if you do. But you still need to dress smart and clean. King says wardrobe rules have
evolved with the times. Just look like you can afford to eat there, and you'll be okay.
It would surprise no one if a guest walked into a steakhouse and,
without a hint of irony, asked if the chef could make the steak without any meat?
"Um, could I speak with the chef, with chef Casper?"
"I have a wonderful '09 that I just opened to let breathe."
In the vegan, gluten-free utopia we now live in, special menu requests are as much a part
of going to dinner as asking for a high chair or a table that isn't near the bathroom. But at
a high-end steakhouse, guests need to remember that there are limits to what chefs will do.
Anibal Macias, General Manager of Bourbon Steak in Miami, adds:
"It's okay to ask for certain things. But don't be offended if they can't be done by the chef."
These include things like the comical request for a vegan side of beef. But it can also
involve things like substitutions in carefully-crafted entrees or
asking the kitchen to time raw bar and salad orders with a thick cut.
Though Bourbon Steak happily cooks steaks however you want them,
there are also the odd steakhouses who will not cook your steak well done. Again, this isn't done
to offend anyone but rather because chefs have an idea of how they want their dishes enjoyed.
Even if a steakhouse doesn't include raw meat as part of its décor,
that doesn't mean you can't ask to see the cut before you order.
Chef Wade Wiestling of Mastro's Steakhouse told First We Feast:
"I actually encourage customers to ask to view the
steak before it's cooked. It allows us to show them the quality of the meat."
Remember, dining in a steakhouse is a far more relaxed and lengthy process than, say, Monday
night dinner at the neighborhood Applebee's. And typically, your servers are seasoned pros
who won't find it even mildly inconvenient to bring out your beef before you order it.
The restaurant is happy to showcase its quality,
and you should be happy to see if your meat looks like the cut you want.
If restaurant etiquette were left up to meme-makers, you'd be forcibly
removed from a steakhouse for ordering a piece of prime meat cooked above medium.
But good chefs — and owners — know taste is subjective, and if someone is throwing down
upwards of $65 for what some might describe as a slightly chewier hockey puck, that's their choice.
That said, if you like your steaks on the more done side, order with the confidence
befitting someone who commands a table at one of the top steakhouses in the city.
Smith and Wollensky's Matt King said:
"We serve dry-aged steaks, recommended to be char-broiled medium rare. However,
if this is not how you enjoy your steak and would like it to be cooked rare or more well done, it's
important to share those details with your server so they can relay your preferences to the chef."
You should also be aware that some restaurants offer special preparations for some steaks,
and it may be worth your time to ask your waiter if that's the case. King mentions a "carnivore
favorite" that the steakhouse chain does on classic cuts: medium-rare with extra char.
He said:
"It will deliver a nice, charred caramelization on the outside,
but a warm, red, juice center on the inside."
"You know one of the great parts about my job is kind of that mission
to bring you the best possible steak on your plate that I can."
A good steakhouse won't have a bad wine on the menu, and ordering the cheapest one
won't reveal a lack of sophistication. Quite the contrary, it shows confidence in the sommelier's
ability to select quality at all price ranges, something good steakhouses pride themselves on.
However, that same sommelier puts a lot of effort into crafting the steakhouse's wine list,
so you should take the time to look it over and order the wine by name.
It's not a checkered-table Italian restaurant, so don't just ask for a pat "house red."
"Richebourg? She really has a Richebourg? Holy mackerel. I've
completely underestimated Stephanie. Oh, good Lord! Um, look at that."
Bourbon Steak's Macias adds:
"Don't order a house glass of white or red wine. Be specific.
The wine list might have multiple wines by the glass and nothing designated as a house wine."
The wine list might also have multiple glasses of cabernet, merlot, or other varietals you ask
for by name. So, again, take the time to peruse the wines by the glass — or bottle,
if you're feeling strong — and order by specific name. It makes you look more
knowledgeable — even if you're not — and makes your server's job just a little bit easier.
A lot of words get slapped on steakhouse menus to make the end product sound more appealing.
And while you'll almost never find low-quality meat in a fine restaurant,
some of those words have specific criteria behind them that aren't always followed.
Wagyu, for example, could refer to any cow from Japan.
"Wagyu beef has this intense marbled texture to it. Lots
of fat. Really indulgent. Super, super rich."
The kind most diners are looking for comes from a specific breed that metabolizes fat in its muscle
tissue, creating exceptionally marbled meat. It'll usually be accompanied by an A4 or A5 rating.
Same goes for Kobe beef. Kobe is a brand name for a certain type of Wagyu
that comes from Kobe, Japan. Only 21 restaurants in America served it as
of 2017. If you see words like "American Kobe," it just means a Japanese cow bred
in America and isn't the high-priced delicacy you may believe it to be.
Additionally, Angus is a type of cow, but Certified Angus Beef is a special brand of
beef that meets strict quality and marbling standards. Any Angus steak might be tasty,
but without the word "certified," nothing distinguishes it from others.
Much like the sommelier takes time to hone their craft and prepare a wine list that sparkles from
top to bottom, so does the chef spend meticulous effort creating perfect presentations for steak.
So dumping an entire bottle of A1 on top of it is like re-touching
the faces on a Picasso because you think the ear's in the wrong place.
It's especially insulting if you haven't even tasted the meat yet, since the chef may have
marinated or dry-rubbed the steak to give it a signature flavor. And if that signature flavor
all of a sudden turns into one crafted by Heinz, what's even the point of dining out?
Chef John Tesar of Knife in Dallas told Thrillist:
"For an aged steak, it's almost sacrilegious to put sauce on it because you're missing out
on the whole process. American sauces are made to add things to a dish or to cover
up meat that isn't as good. Steak sauce became a cover-up and not a complement."
For guests dead-set on having some kind of sauce with their meat,
most steakhouses offer specialty sauces for a few dollars extra, which are created to
complement the meat with delicate flavor profiles. Au poivre, garlic butter, chimichurri, bernaise,
and others are far more acceptable alternatives to stuff you can pick up in the condiment aisle.
Fine cuts of meat aren't meant to be enjoyed in pre-cut pieces suitable for a kindergartner.
If that were the idea, they'd find a way to shape them like dinosaurs.
The correct way to cut a steak at a steakhouse is doing so one bite at a time,
with your knife in your right hand and the fork in your left.
Lefties, this is second nature to you. Righties, it might take some practice.
Hold the meat with your left hand while delicately slicing with your right.
Lefties, go ahead and put that bite of steak straight in your mouth once it's cut. If you
use your right hand, shift the fork over and enjoy from there. Just make sure to remember to place
the knife on your plate before you do so — and not mistakenly on the white-tableclothed table.
"You like steak?"
"I do."
"I deliver steak."
"Do ya?"
Some restaurants serve certain cuts pre-sliced, especially in large cuts made for sharing.
The same rules still apply, though, as typically, those slices aren't bite-sized.
Maybe you're the kind of wing eater who sucks all the meat off and leaves nothing
on the plate but bone and buffalo sauce. It's a style, we admit,
and while it's perfectly acceptable during a marathon football Sunday,
it's unacceptable at a steakhouse when enjoying a bone-in steak, according to Taste of Home.
Some cuts — like giant Tomahawks, for example — offer so much meat on
the bone steakhouses pre-cut it for you. In these cases,
that bone is for decoration only and not part of your meal. Yes, the weight of the bone is
factored into the price of the steak, and you might feel like you're paying for decoration.
But this is not an excuse to go all Fred Flintstone and start gnawing on the bone
at your dinner table. At best, it'll get you some weird looks. At worst,
it'll prevent you from ever being invited to a fine steakhouse with your party again.
Do yourself a favor, and save it for the dog.
If you're into lean cuts of meat like filet mignon and top sirloin, you typically don't get pieces
of pure fat on your fork. But with ribeye, New York strips, and other flavor-filled cuts with
lots of delicious fat, it's not uncommon to get a piece that's almost impossible to chew.
If you find yourself in this predicament, do not spit the meat into your napkin at a steakhouse.
Etiquette expert Jacqueline Whitmore told Forbes:
"If you bite into something difficult to chew — like a piece of meat or
gristle — you don't spit it into your cloth napkin. When no one is looking,
you discreetly take it out with your two fingers and put it on the edge of your plate."
You can ask the waiter for another napkin,
just make sure that one stays out of sight and never on your plate.
Steak, like everything else in the world of food, is subjective. And though the prices at
a steakhouse aren't cheap, the price of the cut won't necessarily correlate with what you like.
For example, the menu at Bourbon Steak is topped by an 20-ounce Cowboy Ribeye clocking in at $75.
Not only is this a massive cut of meat, it's also a highly-marbled cut,
which means it's got lots of fat and loads of flavor.
And if you're into that, then ordering off the top of the menu may be the move.
If you're into leaner, more tender cuts, something like a filet mignon might be
for you. And that one runs only $52, the second-least-expensive cut on the menu.
This rings even truer when visiting a steakhouse with items like wagyu beef,
which are typically sold by the ounce and are much more expensive than traditional cuts.
If you like extra tender, fattier beef, wagyu might be worth the price for you. But if
you're into more traditional preparations and like your steak with a little heft,
spending the extra for wagyu might be a waste.
Check out one of our newest videos right here! Plus,
even more Mashed videos about your favorite restaurants are coming soon.
Subscribe to our YouTube channel and hit the bell so you don't miss a single one.