[music playing]
How was school?
Learny.
Aw jeeze, I gotta get to school.
[laughing]
Hey, don't you have to go to school?
Yeah, but I do it online now. See?
Yay, I'm at school.
OK math, let's see.
Channel two.
Plus channel five...
Equals channel seven.
- Let's go. - I can't go.
Why not?
I'm meeting a friend to work on a school project.
Eh!
So what's your school project about?
Oh, it's--
- Ding dong! - I'll grab it.
- Hi. - Nice hair.
What are you?
Jade!
[moaning]
What are you doing here?
You said you wanted to work on our project.
At your house, not here.
- Whatever, let's just go in-- - No, you can't!
So, first you press 'menu'.
And then-- No hey, pay attention, Murph.
And then if you wanna watch TV... Over here.
You press the 'satellite' button.
Nope, nope. The 'satellite' button.
[doorbell ringing]
Here, pick a channel.
Nothing educational.
So you psyched about the fights?
I can't go.
You're not coming with us?
No, I want to but I've got a huge test at school on Monday.
So I've gotta study all day and night.
Hey, did you bring that stuff from your mom?
- Oh yeah, I got it right here. - Oh!
- Look, I hurt my finger. - How?
I was eating a hotdog and I got confused.
Alright, here you go.
- Yay! - What's that?
Oh, it's called pon thwang.
My mom gets it from an Asian health food store.
What does pon thwang do?
It helps the brain focus and concentrate.
Also improves alertness and memory.
Yeah, so just follow the directions on the bottle, and it'll help you study.
- Thanks. - Alright, let's hit it goons!
- Yay! - Bye.
- Bye. - See you.
To open, push down and twist.
[moaning]
It's time to begin an exercise called Backwards Acting.
- Now you see-- - Sikowitz!
Cat, you're very late. Class is almost over.
This is more important than class.
More important than teaching young people backwards acting?
Why are you dressed like a clown?
Who is that girl?
She's my friend and roommate, Sam.
Well, she's not allowed to be in--
Ah, farm sauce.
Class dismissed.
This is your classroom.
- My classroom. - Yeah.
And you better be a good teacher, or else you're gonna be back in Louisiana
working in a crawdad factory.
Where's Dice? You said he was gonna be here.
He's coming.
When? What's taking so long?
He's only 12.
Cat had to dress him up so he'll look like a regular high school student.
[grumbling]
Now here are the cards that Cat and I wrote up for you to use.
They have enough facts about history to get you through one class.
- Hi, Nona. - Hi, Cat.
Hey, wanna do something fun?
- Well, why don't you... - Yes?
Watch one television news program
and write 500 words on the topic of news that interests you most.
Is this your homework?
- No, this is not my homework. - Really?
OK, it is my homework, but I hate watching the news.
So I was hoping you'd understand.
Nona, but would you please!
Fine, forget it.
I'll watch the stupid news myself.
In Washington, the House Budget Committee passed a joint resolution
to both extend and limit spending rules regarding pension reform.
No!
The Committee is considering another vote later on in the first term of next year.
There's a pic of me with a donkey.
And a burrito.
Watcha doolian?
Online school.
I gotta prove that I did four hours of community service this month.
Oh.
So I'm sending some pics of me feeding homeless animals.
Oh right, because they don't have kitchens to make meals.
Yeah, sort of.
Uh, so there's a pic of me feeding a needy donkey.
UH, I'm not sure donkeys eat burritos.
Yeah, I was worried about that.
Here, how about this one?
You're feeding a dinosaur.
On a submarine.
Oh, I gotta start studying.
Gross.