Hello my wonderful friend! In today's video I have some incredible tips on how
to get a girlfriend for you. And specifically I'll be covering three
massive lies that you really really need to be aware of. If you are struggling to
get your dream girlfriend it's probably because you've been taught one or more
of these lies. And honestly I used to think these lies were 100% true and
I cannot begin to tell you the freedom I have experienced ever since I learned
the truth so I wanted to share them with you today. Before we get started be sure
to subscribe and ring that notification bell if this is your first time watching.
My name is Melannie. I'm a Christian dating coach for men and my specialty is
helping really good guys get the absolute girl of your dreams so be sure
to subscribe, ring that bell, and give me a big thumbs up. Now as I mentioned
we're going to be addressing three massive lies that will keep you from
getting your dream girlfriend. So are you ready to get started? Let's dive in. Now
the first lie that is very very common is that you are just too picky. Have you
ever been told that? The first time I ever heard this I was actually at a
family party. This was years and years ago before I became my coach. And a
specific relative singled me out and approached me. And I knew it was coming
because it always came and she wanted to know if I was dating anyone. You have
that relative too? Lots of fun, right? And I had actually just gone through
a breakup, I really kind of didn't want to talk about it, but I just mentioned
"You know I was getting to know this guy, it didn't work out." And she said to me "Oh
well you're just too picky. Maybe you're just too picky." And I kind of felt
like I had have been hit between the eyes to be perfectly honest with you. If
you've ever been in that situation I'm sure you know what it feels like too. And
I remember thinking "Wait a second. One, that was really rude. And two, why am
i being too picky? The guy I had just broken up with treated me like trash. My
self-esteem was incredibly low, he wasn't good to me, and it just wasn't a good
idea. It was a terrible terrible relationship. So why was I being told
that I was too picky?" It's kind of a terrible situation to find yourself in
when you start wondering "Well am I being too picky?" So let me put your mind at
rest. Here is reality. You are not being too
picky as long as you are willing to rise to the level that you are wanting. Now
pay attention, I'm about to share a massive secret with you. This is the
secret to getting the girl of your dreams. Are you paying attention? The way
to get your dream girl is to be the dream guy of your dream girl. Does that
make sense? Basically as long as you are willing to
rise to the level of the type of person you want to attract, you're not being to
picky. If instead you just kind of expect her to settle for you but you
aren't willing to rise to her level, well then, you know, you kind of need to make a
few changes there. But at the end of the day wanting someone who's going to treat
you amazing, that's not picky. Wanting someone who is incredible in every way
as long as you're trying to be incredible in every way, yeah you're not
being too picky. Be sure to watch this video which is How to Get a Girlfriend
No Matter What, there is a link in the description below, and that will help you
understand how to make sure you are a match for your dream girl, that you are
the dream guy for your dream girl. Because again that's the key and as long
as you have that yeah you're not being too picky at all. Is that making sense?
I want to hear from you in the comments if you would like more videos on how to get
a girlfriend be sure to comment "YES!" in the comments below and I will be sure to
give you more ASAP. Now the second big lie I'm actually going to illustrate
with the story. Sound good? Let's pretend that your friend comes to you one day
and he is so so excited. And he tells you "Hey, I have
been praying and I finally know what I'm supposed to do with my life and I
couldn't be happier. I have prayed and pondered and I feel like God is telling
me to be a doctor and that's what I'm supposed to do." And you say "Oh my
goodness that's so exciting, I'm so happy for you. What schools have you started
looking into? What's your next step?" And he says Well, no, didn't you just hear
what I said? I'm not looking for schools. I just said God called me to be a doctor
so I don't need to go to the school. I actually I found a building in town and
I'm gonna set up my practice and I'm gonna start next week." How would you
reply to your friend? You'd probably try and talk him out of it, right?
That makes no sense. There's absolutely no way that's right. As a
doctor it's your responsibility to know what you're doing, right? You would never
ever ever think about doing that with your career. You obviously would want to
go through the right training for whatever your career is, right? The sad
reality is though that we actually do this with relationships all the time.
Absolutely all the time. For so many of us in the Christian world we have been
taught that you just wait for God to bring you the one. That you just wait on
God and eventually the one will show up. And the truth is guys I believed this for
so many years and sadly I see so many singles, so many
amazing singles, who stay single forever because they believe this lie. Now so
many of us we have been taught this like it is doctrine, right? You have probably
been taught this in church. What most people don't know though is that that's
actually not doctrine. It comes from the whole belief of a soulmate and the one
and only for you. And actually that's not biblical, that is actually anti-biblical.
The whole concept of a soulmate is that there's one other person out there who
will complete you and who will make you whole. But wait, that's not biblical. Jesus
is the only one who can make us whole. Jesus is the only one who can complete
us. So the whole concept of a soulmate is
actually anti-biblical. Now I actually personally do believe in a soulmate but
it actually looks incredibly different from what most people think. That's a
topic for another video. But this whole belief of God is just going to put the
person who is supposed to be with you in your life, that is actually a lie that
keeps so many, so many good Christians single and you don't deserve that. And
it's not fair to you to have been taught that lie. Here's the reality, God is our
loving father, he wants us to learn and grow and progress, he wants us to put in
the effort and then he leads and he intervenes and he guides and directs
because he is certainly going to be involved in you finding your spouse but
he's not going to do the work for you. He's a loving a father, not a control
freak who wants us to be obedient little robots. So just like you would never let
God do all the work in your career or any other big area of your life you
can't just let God do all the work with your relationship either.
When singles believe this, one of two things happens. They either spend their
entire life single and are upset at God for not bringing them the person when
it's actually not God's fault, or they end up just getting exhausted and they
settle for less than they want. So this one who lie is probably the biggest. So
yes God is 100% involved, he already knows who you're going to be with and he
wants to guide you through that process, but just like your career he expects you
to do the work and put in the effort and then he steps in and he intervenes and
helps. Does that make sense? Now our third lie is that your dream relationship does
not exist. I fell for this for so many years you guys. This is part of what made
me want to become a coach is when I finally learned reality about this. I'm
gonna be very blunt with you for a second, is that okay? The truth is toxic
people want you to believe that good and happy relationships don't exist. Toxic
people want you to believe that this is as good as it gets so you better just
settle for it. The reason being they don't want you to rise
above it, they want you to say where you are.
Have you ever heard how if you have a bucket of crabs the crab will try and
crawl up the side of the bucket and get out but another crab will pull them and
pull them back down into the bucket before they can escape? This is what
toxic people do all day long. Any time you starts to peak above the
bucket and think "Hey, maybe there's a whole world out there. Maybe I can go out
and live it." they grab you and they pull you back down because they want you to
stay in the bucket with them. Unfortunately as I was growing up I had
a lot of toxic people in my life and I thought that was normal. And I ached
inside, I wanted a healthy relationship and a happy relationship, my dream
relationship so bad. And I thought it was real because I know God's good but I
wasn't really seeing any evidence of it. It wasn't until I eliminated the toxic
people from my life that I realized holy moly, there are so many happy happy
relationships. They totally exist and you you can have one too as long as you know
the right skills. Yes you need to be realistic in what you want, you need to
realize that people are human, but dream relationships are totally reality when
you have the right skills. Now I actually share some of those
skills with you in my guide 17 Traits Christian Women Want Most in a Man. If
you are wanting your dream girlfriend you need to know these things. There is a
link in the description below it is totally free just click on that link in
the description below enter your name and your email and I will send you this
free guide ASAP. Thank you so much for watching my amazing friend! Be sure to
give me a big thumbs up if you learned something new and if you have not yet
subscribed what are you waiting for? Seriously, hit the subscribe button,
ring the notification bell. You don't want to miss anything I have coming. I
would love to hear from you in the comments. Would you like more videos on
how to get a girlfriend? If you would be sure to comment "YES!" If we're not yet
friends on social media be sure to check out the links for that in the
description below as well. And if you have a friend who is also struggling to
find his dream girlfriend be sure to give this a share, shout it out on social
media. Thank you so much again my amazing
friend and have an amazing day. [blooper beep]
Hello my wonderful friend! Today's video-
[messed up] Okay, so we're already into bloopers. That's good. [laughter]
Got that out of the way.
Now as I mentioned I- [messed up] That's what I mentioned. [laughter]
I was at- [laughter] Nevermind, we're gonna have lots of bloopers.