- Today, I'm going to be making a $600 Big Mac.
First, we're going to start off
with a regular McDonald's
(cash register chimes) Big Mac.
Next, we're going to be adding some gold leaf.
(cash register chimes)
Done.
Mm, wow.
The gold leaf really gives it
no additional flavor or texture at all.
Join me next time when I eat
human (bleep) covered in truffle.
- [Announcer] Every food video ever.
(upbeat music plays)
- We took over this space
from a small family owned restaurant
after the owner got sick and didn't have insurance.
We like to think that we are revitalizing
this working-class neighborhood
by selling our $24 artisan sandwiches.
I recommend getting two.
They're not very filling,
considering they're just lettuce in between bread.
However, we are considering removing the bread soon.
- [Announcer] Mm, food!
- What up, my food goons?
Back at it again with another sweet review!
So we got a special item today.
It's called the chicken quarter.
It's where you combine
a quarter pounder (cow moos)
and a chicken sandwich (chicken clucks)
and you put this bad boy together!
Oh! (bomb explodes)
There it is.
Time to try it.
Mm, that's good.
It's like, it's good.
I guess basically, if I had to sum it up,
I'd say it's good.
(flames sizzle)
Come back next time where I do the Burger McFlurry.
That's where I grind up a burger,
put it into a McFlurry,
and then snort it off my dog's back.
Bye, food goons!
Shh-pow! (bomb explodes)
- [Announcer] I'm vegan, but I watch meat muckbangs.
- David Dobrik, this morning when
you were making blueberry pancakes,
I switched out one of your blueberries for a fly.
(dramatic music)
So glad we could finally get you here on "Hot Ones," David.
So David Dobrik, you once very briefly mentioned to a friend
in a very private conversation
that we somehow got ahold of
that you once had a nightmare about trying to -
- Ha ha, pain!
- David Dobrik, when you were a baby,
the very first day you were on this earth,
and you shot right out of your mama,
do you remember the first thing
you said to your daddy? - So much pain!
- David Dobrik, hang in there, man.
You're doing great.
Keep up the good work.
So David Dobrik, what'd that mouth do?
(David gasps)
- Pain.
- David Dobrik, would you like some of my head skin?
- [Announcer] Where are my paleo peeps at?
- Today on "Make It Healthy"
(host claps)
we're making nachos!
Chips are high in both fat and carbs
so instead we're going to use raw kale.
And we're going to replace those beans with beansprouts.
And what better healthy ingredient
to replace that ooey gooey cheese than more beansprouts!
So there you have it!
Delicious, healthy nachos!
You won't even taste the difference
because this (bleep) is inedible.
What you're going to do,
call up your local Mexican place,
and give yourself some real nachos.
That's what I did.
Mm-hmm, came to my front door,
I put them on my own plate, and I had my whole day, okay?
This is my meal.
Bon appetite.
Bye y'all.
Mmm.
- [Announcer] I watch cooking videos
but I still order pizza.
- My girl's coming tonight
and I'm cooking another masterpiece.
- Oh! What the (bleep)!
(host gags)
What the (bleep) are you doing?
Oh, that's (bleep) disgusting!
Almost as disgusting as your face!
If I was your dad, I'd go back in time,
probably invented the time machine,
and stop myself from conceiving you with your mum
by cutting me own balls off!
(host sighs)
It's so lovely to have another platform
where I can be verbally abusive to strangers
who are just trying their best
because I'm a piece of (bleep) with anger issues.
- [Announcer] I wish I could smell the food
through the screen.
- Welcome to another "Binging with Babish".
Today, we are reluctantly taking a look
at the brightly colored invisible dessert from "Hook."
It's just a bunch of whipped cream with food coloring.
I don't know.
Please stop requesting this.
- Why would anyone ask for this?
Oh, he should do the (bleep) pie from "The Help"!
(keyboard clacking)
Please do the (bleep) pie from "The Help!"
Please!
(keyboard clacking)
(man in hat groans)
Do the (bleep) pie from "The Help"!
All right, next tab.
Pinterest! (keyboard clacking)
- [Announcer] Mine never comes out as pretty
as the one in the video.
- Let me guess.
You're hungry and you don't think you have anything to eat.
Well, you're wrong.
Today, I'm going to teach you how to make a basic dinner
with all the things you already have at home.
First, you're going to need some amaranth.
Some of you are probably wondering
if you can substitute this with either faro or quinoa.
And the answer is no.
Next, you're going to need your white Alba truffles,
preferably from Italy.
If you get them from anywhere else you're dead to me.
And of course your Hawaiian Kona Nigari water,
which we all know is water that's 2000 feet below
the surface of Maui, Hawaii.
Finally go to the forest behind your house,
where you'll get the meat
by hunting the most dangerous game, sharks.
Let's get these boys.
(gun clicks)
Go to the forest behind your house and catch your meat,
which is the
(host stutters)
and me and the shark.
(bleep)
- This is the second time we've done "Hot Ones."
- Yeah, but the last time I was in the seat
for like two and a half hours getting it done.
And now we're just like (bleep) it.
(actors and crew laugh)
- What, do you get more clicks the better
the bald cap looks like?
(actors and crew laugh)
(bleep) you go.