- It's not a good Thanksgiving unless the Cowboys win.
How do the Bills have a better record than us?
Bills haven't played anyone good til now.
If we lose, we gotta fire Garrett.
I'm thankful Troy Aikman isn't commentating this game.
Romo's announcing.
Here we go baby, we getting the ball to start?
Is Sean Lee playing?
Vander Esch is still out?
Sean Lee's playing.
Dak has the most passing yards in the league?
Coop already got more catches than last week.
Coop.
Screen to Zeke, run that!
First down to Coop.
Jordan Phillips hit Coop late. Personal foul, thank you.
Play action, Jason Witten's wide open.
Touchdown!
Finally, a game without a slow start.
Let's go. (hands clapping)
Darian Thompson with the sack!
That's how you start the game, defense.
Zeke on the toss.
Broke a tackle, oh he broke another one.
Go Zeke, oh, 30 yard gain!
Jason Garrett, one of the longest tenures
and still hasn't made it to the Superbowl.
I'd be happy with a NFC Championship.
We couldn't convert on 3rd down?
Go for it, what a punt by Chris Jones.
The Puntisher!
How do we let Cole Beasley catch the ball on 3rd down?
I didn't want Beasley to catch a pass.
Pass interference on Byron Jones?
The defender just slipped down.
That screen ain't working.
Sean Lee sniffed that one out.
Stopped them on this third down.
How is that not pass interference on Gallup?
What type of spot was that?
Dak got that first down.
That was a grown man run.
Are we going for it on fourth down?
We're inside our own 20?
Why didn't we go for it on fourth down last week?
Okay, Jason Garrett, okay!
Someone wants to keep his job.
Jason Garrett is so reactionary.
Go for it again, shoot.
That's too many yards for Singletary.
This drive is going on too long.
Did Cole Beasley really score?
Emmitt Smith in the building.
Dak threw an interception.
Oh no, say it isn't so.
Should've thrown it in the dirt.
Screen wasn't there.
Covington with the sack.
We needed that.
Xavier Woods, you gotta intercept that.
Emmitt Smith is hilarious.
Their kicker missed it.
Their kicker pulled a Maher.
They need to get Emmitt Smith broadcasting again.
Well, maybe not, I remember last time.
Is Connor Williams injured?
Dak got stripped.
The Bills recovered.
Wow, man!
Su'a-Filo got manhandled.
Beasley is killing us.
We shoulda re-signed Beasley.
Can we blitz or do something?
We can't get any pressure on the quarterback.
They didn't get that third down.
They're going for it on fourth down.
Fumble, how did Josh Allen convert that?
How did we not get the fumble?
He wasn't down?
They/ ran a reverse pass.
Singletary is wide open.
Am I about to be upset on Thanksgiving?
Why can't we do plays like that?
They missed the extra point, though.
Here we go, 2 minute offense.
Did Dak throw an interception?
Defensive hands to the face.
Whew, bailed us out.
Glad Zeke hit that pass out of bounds.
That could've been bad.
25 seconds left.
Are we really playing for the field goal?
Playing for the field goal
sums up Jason Garrett's whole career.
And of course Barely Brett Maher misses it.
I didn't see any tipped ball, he just missed it.
I'm really about to be upset on Thanksgiving.
Ellie Goulding, I don't care about...
Man, start the third quarter.
We're a third quarter team.
Demarcus Lawrence nice tackle for a loss.
We really can't cover Cole Beasley.
And a 15 yard penalty for ripping his helmet off?
This is ridiculous.
Nice sack Jourdan Lewis.
41 yard field goal attempt.
Hauschka, miss this one, please.
He hit the goal post and it still went in.
When Brett Maher hits the goalpost it doesn't go in.
There we go Zeke.
I don't know why we stopped giving him the ball.
Gallup, nice catch!
Flag on the play.
It's on Buffalo, illegal contact.
Connor Williams is back.
Good, Su'a-Filo was getting destroyed.
And Dak gets sacked again.
Connor Williams false started.
If he can't go, get him outta there.
Brett missed it.
Of course, Brett missed it!
I would make another Brett Maher joke,
but it's not funny anymore.
Another third down, another conversion for the Bills.
Josh Allen really ran the ball in for a touchdown.
This is Jason Garrett's last game!
If we don't anything this drive, the game's over.
Nice catch Cobb.
Let's go Dak, run that.
That is a grown man run.
Dak wants to win.
Nice catch, Cobb wants to win.
Third and goal.
Michael Gallup what a catch!
How did he catch that?
He didn't get his second foot down.
That should've been pass interference.
Fourth down and goal.
Bad throw by Dak.
That's the play we came up with after all that time?
That's the play we come up with?
Zeke wouldn't have made it to the end zone anyways.
Fourth Quarter.
We gotta score twice and get two two-point conversions.
It's possible.
We can't stop the Bills on third down.
They keep playing the Purge horn.
We about to purge some personnel after this.
'Bout to purge some head coach.
Another third down.
This time we get pass interference, Darian Thompson.
Finally we stopped 'em on third down,
but it doesn't even matter.
They're up three scores now.
Right down the middle.
And they took over seven minutes off the clock.
This game's over.
Cooper got hurt?
This is worst case scenario.
Helmet to the knee.
This day just keeps getting worse.
Cooper walked off on his own.
Honestly just knee the ball.
This is a disgraceful display.
Fourth down and four.
Dak got stripped again.
That's game, I don't even care anymore.
Just knee the ball.
Let me enjoy the rest of my Thanksgiving in misery.
Bryant scored?
We resigned Dez Bryant?
Who is Bryant?
Ventell Bryant, who's Ventell Bryant?
Two point conversion is good.
Two little, too late.
I can't wait for the post-game interview.
The only bright side of this game
is that Jason Garrett's gonna get fired.
This is the worst Thanksgiving ever.
The Bills players are really doing the Dak dance.
Wow.
This is on the coaching.
Why did Zeke have only 12 carries?
Every year, Jason Garrett makes us mediocre.
I'm tired of this.
Someone get Lincoln Riley on the phone.
Jason Garrett better be fired!
Everyone wants to text me all the memes now.
I am done.
How can we be this good, but this bad?
Dak was holding onto the ball for too long.
We deserve better than this!
Somebody better get fired.
You know how hard it is being a Cowboy fan?
I'm not even hungry anymore.
I lost my appetite.
As long as we have the Clapper,
we ain't gonna win nothing.
(melancholy music)
I'm a grown man.
How is Jason Garrett still the coach?
I don't care about Black Friday.
I wanted to win, that's what I want.
Can I buy that?
Can we buy a new head coach?