- Torture convention?
What's a torture convention?
Is that like Comic-Con but for assholes?
(laughing)
Immigration. (upbeat music)
- Give us your tired, your poor,
your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, sometimes.
- Today, we're gonna find out
what does it take to get into America.
Am I allowed to lie on this test?
- Okay.
- Both my parents are immigrants.
But I have no idea what the steps are.
I don't know if they had to, like, submit head shots,
or do like an audition reel.
Hello, my name is Jay.
I like freedom, rap music, and I like cowboy boots.
American now?
- Well, I'm Hiroshi Motomura.
I teach Law at the UCLA School of Law.
- Is it easy to get into America?
- Depends on who you are.
So we let about a million people in the country
legally every year.
I mean, a lot of people think it should be more,
a lot of people think it should be less.
- So you can't just come because you want to.
- You can't come because you want to.
I mean, it's a long process,
and it's longer for some people than others.
Depends partly on the country
you're from and your skill level.
- I hear a lot that the immigration system is broken.
- Well, yeah, it's broken.
That's the one thing that people agree about.
- But how is it broken?
- How is it broken, right?
- Today, we're gonna find out just how hard it would be
to actually immigrate and then become a citizen
in the United States of America.
- You have to pass a test of history and civics.
It is often said that a lot of Americans
wouldn't be able to pass the citizenship test.
- We're gonna find out today.
- In Tennessee, they mostly only teach you
Tennessee history, and that is super useless.
- [Hiroshi] What do we call the first 10 amendments
to the Constitution?
- The first 10, oh boy.
- The Bill of Rights. (bell dinging)
- The Magna Carta. (buzzing)
It's been a long time since I did school.
- [Hiroshi] Who is the governor of your state?
- Oh fuck.
Who is the governor of our state?
- Never heard of him.
Who is he, what's he look like?
Old, white? (bell dinging)
- [Hiroshi] What is the last day you can
send in federal income tax forms?
- Oh my God.
I think I actually know this 'cause
I always miss this date.
- No, April 20th is 4/20.
That's not the answer. (buzzing)
That's not the answer.
- [Hiroshi] What did Susan B. Anthony do?
- Susan B. Anthony designed the first US flag.
(buzzing)
Damn it.
- She was a boss ass bitch, wouldn't you know, man.
- [Hiroshi] You passed.
- Yeah.
- Well, that's good news as far as citizenship test goes.
The more complicated part of this is even getting
in the group of people that's allowed to take it.
Unless you've had a Green Card for five years.
- Wait, what?
- Someone could be waiting 10 or 15 years
if they're waiting to get a Green Card.
- Just for the Green Card. - Just for the Green Card.
(chattering)
- Let me explain what we're talking about
is coming to this country as a so-called immigrant.
You're not a citizen.
This is about getting in and being allowed
to stay indefinitely. (bell dinging)
Being a citizen is a whole other set of hoops
that you have to jump through. - Hiroshi.
- Who puts all these hoops in the air?
Where are all these hoops coming from, Hiroshi?
Today we're gonna meet some people who are citizens,
some people who aren't citizens yet,
but people who have come to America
to live a better life.
- My family is from Iran.
They came to the United States
right after the Iranian Revolution.
My aunt was executed.
My mom was the next one that was supposed to be executed.
She escaped with my other aunt.
Both on horseback, going through the mountains,
just trying to find some place like home.
- I moved to the US five years ago to study college.
Though I had to apply for a student visa,
my hometown, Tampico, Mexico, was undergoing
lots of drug cartel violence at the time.
I left both because of safety reasons,
and also to give myself more opportunities.
- Now, we're gonna simulate how to get
in the country legally.
And there are four different ways to get
into this country.
Who your relatives are, if you have a job prospect,
we also protect people fleeing persecution,
and there's this lottery.
I've written out a few pretty typical stories.
A couple of 'em are from Iran.
A couple of 'em are from Mexico.
- Zach and I are going to be here with Maral
to represent Iran.
And then Maral will help
contextualize the Iranian perspective.
- She's here to make sure we don't fuck it all up.
- It's crazy to say she's gonna get in the country.
I mean, its easy if you have a PhD
and you've won a Nobel Prize.
Eugene's this 23 year old woman,
and your name is Avideh.
And you're a student at a university,
studying physics and chemical engineering.
- Fake Iranian me is so much smarter than real me.
(laughing)
- [Hiroshi] You've recently spoken out
against Islamic fundamentalism.
- I think I have a crush on Iranian Eugene.
- Don't have a crush on fake me.
- [Hiroshi] You've received some threatening phone calls,
accusing you of subversive politics.
But you don't know who made the calls.
You think it would be a good idea
to think about leaving Iran.
And you think about the United States.
- People are calling and threatening my beautiful Avideh.
- I don't know you.
We've never met.
- [Hiroshi] So Ned, here's your story.
Now, you're a college grad, and you work
as a bank officer at a private bank in Mexico City.
You often travel internationally,
and recently met and fell in love with a man from Peru.
And he got his Green Card six years ago.
The two of you want to marry.
- Wow, my husband.
- [Hiroshi] You want to bring with you,
a six year old daughter and a four year old son
from a previous marriage.
- And your first husband turned into a cat.
- [Hiroshi] And you have a mother who's
attached to her grandchildren,
and would be heartbroken if they went with you to LA.
- Abuela, please.
- Abuela.
- [Hiroshi] You're a 55 year old man.
(laughing) - [Maral] What's his name?
- [Hiroshi] That's Firouz.
- Oh. - Firouz, she loves it.
- I love Firouz, it's very poetic.
- I'm poetic.
- [Hiroshi] So you've been working as a barber,
living in a Tehran suburb.
And I'm afraid you've been recently widowed.
- That means I'm single.
- [Hiroshi] You have a sister,
and the sister immigrated 15 years ago
to Los Angeles, where she owns a hair salon.
- So I need to get my sister to become a citizen.
- And then you could just marry your sister.
- No.
No, Maral, that's not how that works.
- [Hiroshi] Keith, you work as a carpenter
and a landscaper in Mexico.
The whole construction industry
has been drying up in your town.
- [Hiroshi] You think your prospects,
who are your three children, would be much better
in the United States.
- I'm a family man.
I wanna set a good example.
- [Hiroshi] One thing I didn't tell you,
that you dropped out of high school.
- Fuck.
Shouldn't have done that.
But times were different, I was partying a lot back then.
(dance music)
- Or you couldn't afford to be in school, realistically.
You just need to work.
- There's a lot of other reasons
you might drop out from high school other than partying.
- I like to party. (dance music)
I'm not saying everybody likes to party.
I'm just me, I'm me.
Mariano, party man.
(bright music) - [Hiroshi] Okay, so,
you've got a tough choice to make.
- Wow, this is a lot to un-package.
- Do I have any super powers?
- What do we know about Avideh?
- So I would say that she comes from
a pretty well-off family.
And also that she's highly intelligent.
- And like, naturally beautiful.
- Just like, with no makeup whatsoever.
- He works at a bank.
- You have some funds.
You have an income.
- Rob the bank.
- No, I'm not gonna rob the bank.
- Rob the bank.
- But if you don't have family here,
you don't have a job, you don't have a claim
for persecution, and you don't win the lottery, you're out.
- I'm going to go for a work visa
because I have the most magical fingers in all of Tehran.
- [Hiroshi] If it's possible, your sister could sponsor you.
But she's gonna have to show that
you are not taking a job away from an American worker.
- That's the one I had to fill out.
- You had to prove that you wouldn't take
anyone else's jobs?
- [Andrea] Yeah.
- [Hiroshi] They have to basically advertise the job.
If everyone was rejected for a legitimate reason,
then you're the only one left standing there,
we can hire you, but then that
process can take several years.
- Do we have scissors here?
'Cause I can show you how good I am.
I think like a nice fade on the side.
- Stop making us not want Firouz to immigrate.
You're already insufferable.
- I have got some dependents.
Am I allowed to go to LA just to like, to visit?
- Tourist visa's a so-called non-immigrant visa.
That means that you have to convince someone,
let's say at the US embassy,
that if you come in to the United States as a tourist,
you will actually leave.
- So, no ties in the US. - I can overstay
on my tourist visa.
Oh, okay, so, I was gonna say,
get the tourist visa, go get married.
- So the US government isn't gonna give you a visa
if they think you might overstay.
- Love knows no laws.
Love knows no laws. - Then rob the bank.
- Well I might have well founded persecution, right?
- [Hiroshi] You're gonna have to show
that this amounts to some kind of pattern
where you're really under some kind of threat.
- You don't think that his threatening
phone calls are credible enough?
- [Hiroshi] You've only gotten a few calls.
- [Zach] Hiroshi, you say a few
as if this is a normal thing.
- [Hiroshi] You don't exactly wanna put yourself out there
until you get more threats, right?
- There are so many countries in the world
that you say one thing, and it's a life
and death situation, and you're done.
- I'd much rather have a student visa
than put myself in more danger
to prove that I'm in danger.
- [Hiroshi] Turns out you have a cousin
who's living, but without papers, in Los Angeles,
and he offers to do what he can
to help you move to LA.
- [Ned] And is that a quick, quick application process?
- [Hiroshi] There is a temporary worker program.
- Like a five year visa?
- I think in terms practically speaking, a year.
- A year?
- [Hiroshi] You might be thinking,
I wanna get a Green Card.
The problem is it's really hard to do that
if you don't have a college degree.
- Could I finish high school now,
and apply to a college?
- That's an option.
- [Keith] But I need to make money.
I don't need to pay money.
- [Andrea] You have a family.
- Do I have any friends with strong Photoshop skills,
and I could get a diploma?
But it's a fake diploma?
- So you're relying on family connection.
- I think that's all I got.
- [Hiroshi] Your sister could become a citizen,
if she isn't already, and she can sponsor you,
but the problem with that is
then you get into a line that's many years long.
- Is that not the fastest line?
- Could be 15 or 20 years.
- 15 to 20 years?
- [Hiroshi] Depends partly on the country you're from.
- [Keith] That's a long line.
- [Hiroshi] For some people, it's a retirement program.
- God, I need to, I'm gonna be here forever.
- Every month, the state department puts out
this list of who we're letting in today.
So if you're from a big country,
in terms of population, you gotta wait longer
than if you're from a smaller country.
But if you marry someone who is a US citizen,
then technically, there's no line.
- Where should we get married,
and what type of dressed should I have the bridesmaids wear?
- [Andrea] That's the important question here.
- [Hiroshi] One thing that does count in your favor
is that you can bring your children with you
- [Both] What about abuelita?
- The problem is you can bring your children,
but not your parents.
- She gets left behind.
- But think about this.
It's gonna take like 10 years.
How old is abuelita?
I was being honest.
You know, it might not be a problem.
You know, people come and go.
- And I don't want a Winter wedding.
- Just let me just mention
a couple complications with Avideh's scenario.
- You don't have to.
- [Hiroshi] One is that you've gotta be able
to prove financial support for this period.
'Cause you won't be allowed to work.
- Oh my gosh, and then you have to find a job
within your field of study.
So it's not like you can be a waitress
for like to pay rent, or something.
You have 90 days to find a job
within your field of study.
- I am not dating you.
You do not have any money.
We know what he was going to say.
- I'm currently on an H1B work visa,
a visa that the current administration
has promised to get rid of.
- If you got a permanent job where
the employer could sponsor you.
This is complicated, though.
- My path to citizenship would be through my employer,
so I would need to stay with my organization
for a long time for them to sponsor me
through the whole Green Card process.
- This is the plight of all of my
international student friends.
- I have a couple of friends who are international
students with me, and they weren't able to find jobs,
so now they have to go home.
Fortunately, that was not the case for me.
- Does this mean we're getting married?
- Hell no. - Damn.
- Okay, so I feel like my plan now,
since I don't wanna leave abuelita,
I'm gonna get Eduardo to apply for his citizenship,
get married, maybe we'll live in Mexico City for a while,
tend to abuela, and then after she passes,
we can move to LA.
- Ouch.
- She's going to die at some point.
I don't know.
I don't know what to do.
- I'm gonna build a boat.
- [Hiroshi] That sounds very biblical.
- [Keith] And I'm gonna sell the boat.
Now I got some money.
I'm gonna build another boat.
Put the family on that boat.
We're gonna go up the coast.
We're in America.
- I don't know if that's how it works.
- Why can't it work?
Has anyone ever tried the double boat method?
- He's getting creative, here.
- I've gotta do something to save my family.
I got three kinds depending on me.
There's no path for me.
- A lot of this has to do with
a mis-match between what our economy
seems to want, and the people we actually let in.
Millions of employers in this country
who think they need immigrant workers.
We have a congress that's not willing to
create lines to stand in
if you don't have a college degree.
- People wanna hire me.
- There are jobs.
- I can build boats, boats, boats, boats for days.
- So a lot of people say,
why don't you stand in line?
Well, there's no line to stand in.
But also, immigrants do a lot of the work
that keeps businesses in this country,
and they create jobs for all kinds of people.
Including a lot of Americans.
- [Keith] What is this paperwork?
- [Hiroshi] Well, the form you're looking at
is for someone who wants to get a Green Card.
- I think you gave me multiple, by accident.
- It's giving me anxiety just to see them
because I've had to fill out so many of these forms before.
- There's a separate form for temporary workers.
- And then this is to become a citizen?
- Five years later, you could apply for citizenship.
- I'm gonna be dead by then.
- Maybe I should just go to Mexico City.
Seems like there's a lot of banks there.
- I bet our kids would be friends.
- You know, the fees could run you in
the hundreds to a few thousands of dollars.
Lawyers fees might run you thousands of dollars,
if there are complicated issues in the case.
- I don't think I have enough money
to fill out these forms, and eat.
- But there's one other complication I wanna mention,
and that is a travel ban in effect.
- Oh yeah, that thing.
- [Hiroshi] The basic idea is to suspend immigration
from first seven, now six different countries.
I mean, the one that's most affected is Iran, naturally.
I mean, about half the people affected.
And there's also a separate reduction
number of refugees that are allowed to come in.
So it's been defended as a national security measure,
but it's being challenged by saying
that it's a pretext, is also challenged by saying,
hey, this is really targeting Muslims.
It's following one of the campaign promise of a Muslim ban.
- I remember distinctively the day that my mom
texted me about the travel ban.
And she was like, call me.
Like, I could hear the tears in her voice.
It was very much of her just talking about
how many families don't have a future.
- [Hiroshi] Becoming a US citizen
was only available to free white persons.
It's only in 1952.
- 1952.
- 1952 was the first time congress says
we're gonna let you become a citizen
regardless of country you're from.
What we think it was normal America
used to be seen as really exotic.
But it was a time in the 1800s where
the real concern was Catholics.
Because they owed allegiance to the Pope,
and they couldn't possibly be good Americans.
History doesn't repeat itself, but it often rhymes.
(slow music)
- I chose to go a more student based route.
- Yeah, you might, and a lot of people do
leave themselves open to getting job offers
when they graduate.
That is going to allow you to get a Green Card.
But there are a lot of pitfalls along the way,
and a lot of people don't make it through.
I mean, a lot of people don't ever find that employer.
You don't know how long it's gonna take.
You don't know if something will go wrong.
Having your mom come visit you later,
that might be tough, because there's a suspicion
maybe she'll stay.
And you gotta make some choices about your family life.
- It's like I can ultimately make it to America,
but it would come at great personal sacrifice.
- Even though that's the quickest path, supposedly.
- Wow, wow.
- And it's gotten so much harder over the years.
She can try to sponsor you,
but that's a really long line.
It's really measured in decades now.
- [Zach] Decades.
- I mean, I suppose there are people who think
that's the way the system ought to be.
But no matter where you come out on that, I mean,
the fact is it's really hard to get into this country.
- How many people would you say
are wanting to come to America,
but there's just no path?
- The answer's gotta be in the millions,
because, you know, we have 11 million people
in this country who don't have legal status,
and people sometimes say, why don't you just stand in line.
Well, I'm not sure there's much of a line
for you to stand in.
- I'm gonna come here without papers
and just send money back to my family until they find me.
- Well, a lot of people are doing that.
- That's what I would do.
And I totally understand why you'd do that.
- I'm ashamed at how much I was unaware of.
So much of whether or not you can get to America
is out of your control.
It's where were you born,
how much money were you born into,
did you have the privilege and the opportunity
to get an education?
Because guess what, you could also work really hard,
and still not get it.
- Many times, we talk about immigrants
with this blanket terminology.
When in fact, it's a very nuanced,
highly personal, diverse, perspective-driven process
that changes from individual to individual,
and generally, it favors people
who have higher educations and a little bit more money.
And so I think that's the sad thing is that
the most un-American thing is trying to block people out
who are doing the most American thing,
working hard to have a better life.
- For anyone to have a perspective of
those people shouldn't be here, America first,
it's garbage.
People are dying in other countries.
That's why they wanna come here.
They wanna have lives.
- The fact that we're here just speaks to
what America can be, and what it should be.
- And that we all are just a human race, you know.
(bright music)