Transcriber: Patricia Aguirre Reviewer: Proma Banerjee
I'm that woman who wants to know answers to questions
before the questions have even been asked.
Ask my husband, he thinks I know everything.
Not really.
Our dear friends Neil and Jennifer invited us to participate
in the Right Lead Youth Leadership Institute
in Durban, South Africa.
And my first thought was,
"Finally, I'm headed to Africa."
But next, my mind was hit with a series,
a barrage of questions.
Growing up,
I listened very carefully
to the stories my mother told me of segregation.
Right here, at home.
So the prospect of visiting South Africa,
well, I wondered about the residue of apartheid.
See this program,
it isn't just South Africans
and Americans coming together.
It's a cross cultural exchange.
For the young people of Durban.
Kids from Zwelibanzi High School
and Bechet High School
for the first time...
a generation...
comes together...
to build nation.
I wondered...
would my first experience in the motherland
be affected by racism
in ways that I
didn't understand.
There's this word, it's Ubuntu.
It means I am because you are.
I am because all of you are.
Doctor King might have put it like this:
our lives are inextricably bound.
I understood the translation
but I wasn't quite sure that I fully understood its meaning.
I wondered if I could learn.
And then there was this
one... last... very pressing, extremely important question.
It was:
What am I going to do with my hair?
When I'm in Africa for the first time?
I'm serious.
My hair is important to me.
It's wrapped up in my cultural heritage.
Who I am.
I tell you.
You got to know.
So I knew the answer to this question,
though I headed to the Dayton Mall to the Body by Shea kiosk,
and I purchased pure, raw, African Shea butter.
It's the gold standard of black natural hair care.
See I keep my hair natural so it's not to deviate too far
from the masterwork the creator has given me.
(Laughter)
(Applause)
So I packed my tub of Shea butter and I head to Africa.
Across 10,000 miles.
Two continents.
One great ocean, and 24 hours on airplanes.
Finally, I'm here. I'm in Africa!
And my hair was dried out.
Because the TSA had taken my tub of pure raw African Shea butter.
No worries! I'm in Africa!
I can find it everywhere, right?
So before I get some sleep, before I shower,
before I eat, before I explore,
before I do anything.
I say, "Dear Neil, Jennifer,
please take me some place to get some pure, raw, African Shea butter.
They take me to a mall that looks just like the Dayton Mall.
We walk into a store that looks like Bath & Body Works,
and I say,
"Excuse me miss, may I please find some pure, raw African Shea butter?"
And she doesn't know what I'm talking about.
In fact, no store in the mall had it,
and not one South African I met that day had a clue what I was talking about.
I thought to myself:
"Well, OK, maybe the people I've met today
are fair skinned, straighter hair African people.
Maybe that's why.
I'll find it, I'll find it."
A day passes.
We meet the beautiful kids of Zwelibanzi High School,
they sing wonderfully, they are sharp, these kids, I like them.
In the back of my mind is:
"What? You got any Shea butter?"
(Laughter)
Another day passes,
we go to Bechet High School,
the kids are a little quiet when I first meet them,
but I can tell they are going to be firecrackers.
I like them already.
What's in the back of my mind?
Shea butter.
Days pass.
We're all in the classroom together.
Angelina she sprawls out on the floor
and writes composition books full of poetry
she only shares a few words with us.
Sphelele well she smiles when she writes poetry,
and when she speaks,
something sassy always comes out.
There's Nhlakanipho,
I call him Mr. President,
because he writes with the authority of a preacher.
But he's just a little boy,
who loves hugs, and kindness, and respect.
And then there's sweet, sweet Malachi.
Well, he didn't want to write poetry.
He had been conscripted into my group,
he really wanted to be in...
the music and visual arts program.
(Laughter)
We were...
(Laughter)
We were learning each other.
All of us. Together.
Learning each other.
And I was stuck on Shea butter.
It had been the only answer I had.
The only answer I could rely on.
One day, we go to another mall.
And I notice that the people at this mall look a little more like me,
maybe darker skin,
more tightly coiled hair,
I'm hopeful.
I'm thinking: "It's gotta be here."
So while Neil, Jennifer and our whole crew
they're dining and fellowshiping together,
I make Scott come with me.
To the beauty supply shop.
I go straight to the hair care aisle,
and I can see everything that you can find
right here on Salem Avenue at Hair Gold Beauty Supply.
Except for pure, raw African Shea butter.
I gave up.
I bought some Ultra Sheen.
(Laughter)
We left.
There's this funny thing that happens when you let something go.
Maybe a good idea might enter.
I remembered that
African Shea butter originates
in the savannas and forest lands of West Africa.
I was in South Africa!
Shea butter epiphany number 1.
If Africa is the hand,
I have only experienced the tip of a finger nail.
How dare I try to reduce her to my thimbleful of knowledge!
Shea butter epiphany number 2.
Questions, sometimes, many times.
They only lead to more questions.
I don't like that.
Shea butter epiphany number 3.
(Laughter)
That wasn't part of the plan, Scott.
Shea butter epiphany number 3.
If I don't really, fully understand Africa,
can I ever fully understand myself?
Understand my people?
This story, it has no conclusion.
I just have more questions.
Maybe a few more epiphanies might come.
But we must leave you.
So we'll leave you with this.
Ubuntu.
I am because you are.
Ubuntu.
We are because you are.
Ubuntu.
Evan, Aurora,
we are because you are.
Ubuntu
Neil, Jennifer,
Nhalkanipho, Malachi,
Sade, Bongiwe, Dawn,
Deli, Nonhlanhla,
Mr. Padayachee,
we are because you are.
(Applause)