The following trailer is written S for spoilers
The world hangs in the balance
Tom Cruise will hang in balance
in the franchise that keeps pushing him to top the last one
until he dies making one of these and we examine our own
role in this deadly game of stunt chicken
But until then...
you jump off that roof, you jumped, good boy, whoa
Mission Impossible:
Fallout
Rejoin the impossible mission force...
on their most dangerous mission yet ,
getting their hands on some balls.
As Ethan Hunt loses his balls,
tracks the balls down,
and has his best friends and ex-wife work together to stop those balls from exploding
I don't have enough hands.
Tom, buddy. We know you still got it.
You want to ram it down our throats with the metaphors?
Hmm, you've seen every mi yet.
So of course you were thrilled when Solomon Lane returned
No? You don't remember him?
Well, you do remember the badass M.I.6 agent, Elsa.
No, that's his wife remarried in M.I 3
That's just some random cop.
That's Katie Holmes.
Okay, that's her.
And you remember the evil syndicate, right?
That's Hydra. That's Spectre. Fine.
Forget everything you never remembered in the first place...
because our heroes are up against the apostles,
and they've got a plan to wipe out 1/3 of the global population.
That's Thanos. I said 1/3 not 1/2.
They're gonna stop 1/3 of the world's population.
Look newbie,
I'm here to watch Tom hang from stuff...
where six missions in and I still call the ving rhymes character bing rhymes
Even the people in the films he lost this time.
It's complicated.
What the hell is he doing?
What the hell are you doing?
I don't understand what I'm involved in?
What am I involved in?
Why did you have to make this so fxxking complicated?
Joining the gang,
or if you saw the trailer,
betraying the gang,
is a secret agent August Walker,
a role that cements Henry Cavill as the new king of men's room scenes
He's a spy that could go undercover...
as anyone from an NFL linebacker...
to Hagar from final fight
Complete with arms that require reload
and a moustache so powerful
It could cripple the DCEU, so, you know
It's gonna go down when he finally faces off against its most brutal foe yet
Alec Baldwin?
Alec, he went out of the franchise just disappear like Jeremy Renner did,
or Paula Patton
or Tandy Newton
or Jonathan Rhys Meyers
or Laurence Fishburne
or Anthony Hopkins,
Why did these people go?
Are they "the apostles"?
So, if you like the same potent mix of intrigue,
and cardio as the last five of these things,
and don't mind that they still lean on mask trick pretty hard
Or use the same halo jump sequence as two other bad robot productions,
or have a weirdly similar ending to return of the King
Enjoy one of the best action movies of the year...
because the next one might be his last
Ohhhh...
Tom, you've given us enough, stop.
STARRING
the man from swole
Thetan hunt
I'm the hat man.
Keep up a fight up up
Benji man's buttons, you know, cuz he's Manning the buttons.
Ilsa Me, Rebecca Ferguson
Hannibal Lectures
Scarlett Johansson
Scarlett Johansson?
Wow. What a chameleon.
Jack Tryin'
, and fake news
Stuntman V Superman: Tom of Justice
Have a seat.
The Nubra River Valley
Is an ending rangs contract that he never has to stand up?
Well, good.
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea Josh Peck gives me goosebumps
They did surgery on a grape
You sit on a throne of lies
We are young. Life is fun
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