Hi (well hello there)
My name is Markiplier, and I'm here with Mamaplier
Mamaplier: Hi, everybody??
We just got done with the 'How Well do you Know your Child' thing. Now, I've got another quiz of 'How Well do I Know
you.' You ready? Yeeh First question:
"What color are your eyes?" And I'm not gonna look. You write down the answer. Don't let me see. [Mama: Okay.]
Brown.
Mama: I'm sorry. Wrong.
Mark: Wai-?
No. [Mama: They're black!] No one has black eyes. (stares intensely into eachother's eyes)
Mark: That's brown!
Mama: Black.
Mama: Wrong!
[Mama: Next!] Mark: "What is your favorite thing to do?" Okay. Your favorite thing- Don't show me!
[Mama: Oh, sorry!] Mark: I can't see! [Mama: Oh
Pardon me.] Mark: Your favorite thing to do is bargain shopping.
Mama: I forgot about that.
[Mark chuckling.]
That is right. [Mark, through laughter: What?]
But I think I chose the wr- the-the-the-the.
Mark: What did you write down?
Mama: I have a few favourite things to do.
Mama: But that is right, I wish I had chose that answer. Mark: Well, what did you put?
Mama: I put right here.
Mark: Cooking and eating.
[Mark and Mamaplier laughing.]
Mark: Okay. Mama: Little piggy! Oink oink!
Mark: What would you consider to be the nicest thing I could do for you?
Mark: What would be the nicest thing that I can do for you?
Mama: Oh, I know.
Mama: Okay. Mark, unsure: Okay?
Mark: I'm gonna go with pay off your bills.
Mama: (wheeze)
Mama: But, that's a nice thing to do. Mark: Uh-huh, but not the nicest?
Mama: It's not the nicest.
Mark: Well, why not? It's pretty nice. Mama: I mean, it's nice but it's not
Uh, It's not. *Hmm but remixed.*
Okay. My answer's a little different here. [Mark: Okay. What is your answer?] My answer, as a mom. Mark: Mm-hmm?
*a very soft oof from a very soft boy*
Mark: That's so nice.
Mama: I cannot ask anything better.
Mark: Oh, so nice. Mama, mimicking Mark: Oh! So nice!
Mama: You never changed. You were always same.
Ever since you were born, [Mark: Uh-huh.] except you lost some weight.
You were 10 pounds 3 ounces when you were born. Since That!
Other than that, you know.
You never changed. You're same. Your face has hardly changed.
Except you got a little bigger. (roasted)
Personality's still the same.
Happy.
Lookout in life is about the same.
So, no matter what.
Mark: That's too nice. [Mama cackling.]
You can't do that. That's too nice. Mama: That's too nice?
Mark: We didn't get into the n- deep, nice questions. "If you had all the time and money in the world, what would you spend your time doing?"
Mark: All the time and money in the world
Mama: I got it
Mark: Okay, if you had all the time in the world, you would...
*Mark.exe has stopped working.*
Travel the world. [Mama laughing]
You would build a compound and start a cult.
[Mama wheezing even more]
You'd love to be a cult leader! You would! You'd make a great cult leader!
What was your answer? Not a cult leader?
Mark: Maybe, when I was younger. But, no.
Uh, same. I'd be your mom.
Mark, in denial: That's too nice! Mama: Oh, come on!
Mark: So nice. Mama, mimicking Mark: So nice!
Mark: Even with all the time and money in the world, you'd still be m- What does being my mom entail? Would you-
Mama: Okay. Well, you know that being your mom is uh-
Making sure your stomach's full. [Mark: Mm-hmm.]
You have a bed to sleep. [Mark: Mm-hmm.]
And, uh-
Clean place to come home to.
What else can I do? Mark: You can start a cult! Okay, umm. "What's your greatest unfulfilled dream?"
Mama: Okay.
Mark: Uhhhhhhhhh.
Mark: You were never a singer.
Mama: Unfulfilled dream. Dream is you dream so bad... Uh-huh
That not- didn't come true, right? [Mark: Mm-hmm]
Mama: My answer? [Mark: Yeah?]
Mama: Nothing
Mark being hit in the feels: Ugh, oh that's-
Mama: You know what-what. You know what, truly, what was my dream? Yeah. When I wa- ever since I was 10 years old. [Mark: Mm-hmm]
Looking through the thicc Sears catalog. [Mark: Mm-hmm]
Sears Catal- Have you seen the Sears Catalog? Size of phone book, yellow. [Mark: Mm-hmm.] My father wrote one.
Work for US Army, okay?
So, it's a US sears catalog. In the front there's, um-
You know, mechanical stuff. Black and white. And the back was color.
Ladies well-dressed, clothing, bedding, jewelry.
That was my dream. I- Before I- Every night before I go to bed,
I'll open and dream to myself and pray to God:
"Someday, it's gonna be like that."
"I'm gonna sleep onto that bed."
Nice. High. American style bed. [Mark: Mm-hmm.] Y'know, nice. Y'know.
Nice place. I know someday I'll come to America, to leave. [Mark: Mm-hmm.]
It come true.
Mark, being bashed in the feels: That's so nice.
Everything come true.
Plus bonus! You!
Mark: Ooh, this is interesting. Uhh.
"What was your first full-time job?" [Mama: I don't think you know this one.]
I probably don't. It wouldn't have been- It's not nursing or it's not that. It would have been before that. [Mama: Mm-hmm.]
Did you- Did you ever clean?
[Mama: No, I hate cleaning. What are you talking about?] Did you work in like a grocery store or something? [Mama: Never work there.]
Eh.
Was it back in Korea when you were working this full time job? [Mama: No, I came here at 21.
I never worked in Korea.] Mark: Mmm.
Mama: I was in school, dear. Mark: Yeah.
Mama: Think! A profession, you can call profession, that don't require
speaking good English.
Only skilled, you know.
You don't have to say anything much other than 'Hello.' 'Sit down.'
'Open your mouth wide.' Mark: You're a waitress? (wha-)
[Mama wheezing and Mark laughing.]
Mark: That's the- That's the only waitress experience I have.
Mama: What kind of waitress says 'Open your mouth wide.'?
For what?
Mark: I don't know. Mama: Who say open your w- open your mouth wide?
Mark: Whenever I go to a restaurant, they're like 'Hello. Sit down. Open your mouth wide.'
Mama: They don't say-no! 'Open your wallet wide.'
Mark: Oh, well did you take care of babies or something like that?
Mama: When I say to open your mouth Mark: I don't know!
A baby comes in, you go 'Hello.'
Mama: Oh my god, ugh.
Mark: Ohh
Ah that- That makes sense. A dental assistant.
Mama: I tell you, I got a job at the US Army. Mark: Ahh.
As a dental assistant. Mark: Mm-hmm.
How do I get hired? Miracle. Mark: Yeah.
But I worked at the US Army dental clinic.
Mark: That's so funny. Mama: In Ohio!
No, it's not Ohio. What is that? In Honolulu, uh, Hawaii.
Mark: Okay, so "Who is your closest friend?"
Mama: Oh. That's easy. That's so easy. You should know.
I have my best girlfriend. Ever.
She is my best, best, best girl.
Beautiful girl. And whenever she walk,
Oh, Everybody turn their heads, say 'What a beautiful- My- No- What a beautiful oooh!'
It made me, not embarrassed. And I-I'm not jealous over the attention.
It made me so proud of my girl. Mark: Mmm.
Look at that. Mark: Lucy.
Mama: Yeah!
Mark: Oh, I always forget that's how you spell Lucy.
Mama: Why? Whas wrong?
'Lussy'
Mark: There's the two 'S's
Mama: 'LUUUUUSSY'. Mark: Yeah. Yeah, uh-huh.
Mama: Y'know around like 5 O'clock, after dinner. Mark: Mm-hmm. Mama: Around that time, she comes
And she tap on my [slap] shoulder [slap] like this. Mark: Yeah.
If I don't respond, right away. Mark: Mm-hmm.
She come over, scratch, with her- Mark: Yeah.
She's very persistent. She never give up. Time to go to walk. Mark: So Lussy's taking Maggie's place is your favorite?
[Realising her mistake but standing by it.]
Mama: Oh, come on, don't tell Maggie, Okay?
Mark: Oh, shhh. I won't tell Maggie. Mama: Shhh. Don't worry I won't tell Maggie.
"What is your favorite kind of music?"
Mama: Music? Music.
Mark: I think it's like the oldies. Like Bee Gees and Abba. Mama: Yeah, soft rock.
Mark: Yeah, soft rock. Is that what soft rock is? Mama: I think so. Is that soft rock?
Mark: I'll count it. I'll count that as me getting the right answer. All right. How about this one for a final question?
"How did you meet.. My dad?"
Mama: Honey, I could write a book about this story. Mm-hmm. But I think.
I'm gonna wait.
Mark: Wait for the book.
Mark: No
Mama: No, wait for time to pass. Maybe. Maybe not.
How do I met him? Mark: Mm-hmm
Well, you know what?
If you wish. [if you wish upon a staaaaaar]
Long and hard.
The dream always come true. So, you have to watch what you're wishing for.
'Cause it happened to me.
Remember? Since I was about eight, I wish to come to America.
Every night, I dream of it.
Korea at the time, right now Korea living situation's a lot better, improved a lot.
They make more money and they have all the convenience, right? We enjoy in America.
But, 1980s, not so. It was not for everybody.
So, when I sleep on the floor. Don't- Don't get it- Think I'm on the floor. You know what I mean? Blanket. [whut]
I wish that I live in America so I can have a different kind of lifestyle. Well, your father.
He walk into my life on- Suddenly, in spring of 1979. 1980, I think.
I was in high school. I was 16.
And my dad, who used to work on a US Army base.
Invite one of the soldier who came, assign to come to Korea. For dinner, supper. You know
Because my dad enjoy, you know training new officer.
Coming to us and Korea.
And that fateful- That was moment- That was my moment that I met your dad. Mark: Mm-hmm.
Sitting next to my dad. Drinking coffee and talking.
And I was shy. You know what I mean? Mark: Mm-hmm. Poor young girl.
But I had- I just felt like I want to be friend with you- with him.
I want- I said, "May I- May I learn how to speak English from you?
And he said "Oh sure. I used to be an English teacher. I'll be glad to."
So he's been coming to see my dad and me.
You know what I mean? Because he has time. He was assigned to come to Korea for a year.
Yeah, you know, that's how we kind of be- Become a friend.
Then 4 years later, he came back and he fell in love with uh,
Me, I guess...?
You know, I lost all the baby fat. I was, kind of, 19 turning 20. 19. Mark: Mm-hmm.
My hair was, y'know, a little longer.
When he met me first, I was like this. My hair was short. I had a high school haircut.
So he started to look at me as a woman, not as a girl.
So that was that.
Mark: Yeah, when did you come to America? Mama: Following year. Mark: Yeah? Oh, also, when I turned 21.
December twe- Month of December, 1985. That was one of my dream came true.
Then Thomas was born two years later? I mean, two years later after that, right?
Mama: No, a year later. Thomas was born a year later. '87, right?
Was he born in '87? [Mark: Yeah, '87.] Well, I count December. '85. Yeah, '87.
Yeah, I was not planned, right?
(sigh) That's another story.
Well, do you have any, uh, any other embarrassing stories that you want to tell them about me as a kid? Mama: Oh my goodness! (Mark scared for his life)
Embarrassing story. There's so many, I don't know where to start here. No, nothing embarrassing, but I'll tell you one thing.
One thing I could tell you.
When you are, uh, six years old. You, and your brother, and I, and my sister who came and just visited me from Korea.
We went to Kings Island in Ice- in Cincinnati, Ohio, it's a big one. And that was very crowded evening.
We went there with so many people at probably a Saturday night.
And, I don't know what happen. It was so many people and I look, and I turn, and you're gone.
You're only 5. Barely 5, maybe 4. And I was panic, I start panic. 'Oh, noo. Wahhh!'
And I looked, looked, looked but you were gone! Oh my good- I could not believe the- The feeling.
And then that's- I spotted a tall, uniform, looks like, uh, police officer.
Whatever look like, uh, an office- You know, somebody who worked there.
So I has to rush back to him, I say "Oh, sir, sir. I lost my son. He's about this high.
"And it's a boy. And, uh, he's gone! He was- One minute he was here, and one minute he's gone!
And you know, he said- He kind of would smile at me, knowing smile. Mm-hmm
"I think I know where he's at." "Oh you do?" "Go check on the lost and found place."
So me, and my sister, and your brother rush, and walk, and run, and go there.
And then, there you are! At the lost and found, playing with toy all by yourself. It was nobody lost but him.
Mark: Yeah, I re- I remember that.
And then, the question. Remember what I asked? What?
"How did you get here?"
Your question was- I don't know, you remember that? No, I don't. You don't remember, right? No. Because you're so little.
You're 5, right? Mark: Uh-huh. But I remember because, well, I was mom and I know.
"How did you get here?" You know what he said? "One minute you- Mom, you were here, but you're gone!"
"So, next best thing I do is, I look. There was guy with a uniform, look like police officer."
So you went there, said "Hey, hey, sir. I lost my mom. Can you help me?"
And he direct you to the lost and found way forward?
Mark: Well here's the thing. I remember looking at the- The big wheel. It was a big spinning wheel. Like, with tons of lights.
And, uh, and I remember just staring, I was memor- Mesmerized by it. I was like 'Whoooaa'.
I wanted to watch it all the way go back down until it was done. Then, done, I turned around and you were gone.
And then I just remem- Like I don't remember anything in between, like, realizing that you were gone to being in that place.
Like, I don't remember asking a guard where, like, to go. All I remember is, um, like, I couldn't find you and then I remember being in the, uh, in lost and found place.
Like my memory's real spotty as a kid.
Mama: But because I was so desperate, you know what I mean? And then I asked, asked. Because I asked the question. "How did you get here?"
And he said "Oh that's what happened." Right? And then the guy with knowing smile.
I just knew that's true. Mark: He- He could have been just like "Heh, you lost your child. Heuheuheuheu."
Mama: "Well, Really? How dumb are you!?"
Mark: Any more? Any more stories? Mama: Oh, oh, another thing.
This is your- what you want. We- I- One time I invite a girlfriend and the girlfriend had a girl about your age at the time. About 4 years old, 5.
And you and your brother and you was playing downstairs, in the basement. Something with toy. And we are upstairs talking and cooking, whatever.
And next minute, I heard you crying. You're crying like "HUURRRRRRR!"
I say "What happened, Mark?" I rush down, whatever. "That- That girl slapped my face!"
Your face was red and bruised. Not bruised there, you got got a real HEUU.
I said- I said "Mark! Why!?" "I don't know, she just slapped me!" I say "Why didn't you slap her back?"
You said- You know what you said? You remember what you said? Mark: No, I don't remember any of this.
"Well, she's a girl. I know I cannot hit a girl." ((she hit you hit her back dude))
I don't know where you learned that. I never told you you should not hit a girl. Mark: I don't remember that at all.
You said "Well, she's a girl. Yeah, I shouldn't hit a girl. Right, mom?" I just left.
You don't remember it? Mark: No, I don't remember any of it.
You and your brother never had a fight. Mark: No? Mama: Always played nicely.
Mark: We fought like on occasion, but it was very rare. Mama: I never seen it.
Mark: Yeah, it wasn't when you were around. Mama: No. I cannot even remember anything bad.
Mark: No, we were good kids. We were a bit boring in that regard. We didn't cause trouble. Mama: Not that much. Mark: We just went on the woods played.
I remember how pissed I was when I realized I had to go to school. ((same))
Mama: Really? Mark: That was the worst.
Just like the- The realization that, like, my life wasn't all play. I had to, like, go to school, I was like:
*strange mark sounds*
"I wanna go in the woods so bad."
Mama: You say you wish you play for living, right? Yeah. You wanna wish it.Your wish come true. Mark: My lif-My life is not playful.
[Mama: Oh.] I meant like for work. Mama: Video game is not play?
Mark: Nah, not when you do it as a job.
Mama: Sorry. Mark: No, that's okay. That's all right. Mama: I thought it was all game. Mark: Ah, I wish. Mama: I was wrong.
Mark: Anyway, well, this has been the 'How Well do I Know my Mom?' I think I only got one question right.
Which is pretty decent in my book. So thank you so much for playing this with me.
And, uh, thanks for embarrassing me in front of Internet and uh.
Thank you everybody so much for watching
Um, I will be coming to Australia and Amsterdam. Amsterdam in July and Australia in November.
You can check out tickets at tour.markiplier.com and hopefully I'll see you there. Thanks again, mom.
And, as always, we'll see you in the next video. Buh-Bye!
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