♪ (old school video game music) ♪
(Finebros) Today, you get to play some video games.
Oh, God.
I don't think I've ever actually played a video game.
If I play a game, it's a card game.
(Finebros) So we're going to have you play a game that's a little bit different.
Okay.
'Happy Wheels'?
What is this?
I'm playin' Happy Wheels, apparently. (chuckles)
I'll try! I'm not very coordinated. (chuckles)
How come I don't have a joystick?
Where's the joystick?
(laughing) The baby on the back. I'm gonna lose that kid, I know.
Ouch.
Ah... 'kay.
Heh.
He makes me feel like a kid again.
I don't get what it- I'm supposed to do.
- (character) Oh, God!! - (disgusted) OH! Oh, my God!
Ew ew ewwww!
- My goodness. (chuckles) - (character groans in pain)
Okay...
Ah, whoaaaa! (chuckles)
- I guess- oh... - (character groans)
OH my goodness, I killed everybody!
Oh, I wasn't going fast enough.
Ahhhhh.
- (character splatters) - (chuckles) Oh.
Kinda gory.
(character) Ah! Oww!
Oh.
Oh, I'm still alive!
Oh. Does that... signal death?
You're backwards. I don't wanna go backwards.
I just splattered myself.
Okay.
I'm going, I'm going... Oh no.
Headfirst.
Ahhhh... Whoops!
That didn't work.
It's a very bloody game.
Loop-de-loop! Come on, baby, come on! Make it.
Oops. (laughing)
Oops.
You know what? We gotta leave these games to the kids!
(laughing) Oh, God.
Oh my God.
I know I killed the guy. Can't - can't I just kill him without it being so graphic?
Or does that mean that it's not as much fun?
- Ohhhh. (chuckles) - (character grunts repeatedly)
- (chuckles heartily) - (victory sound)
How did that happen? (chuckles)
I hope we're not being graded on this thing.
That was awful! (laughing)
Yeah. Why don't we try a different level?
- Here we go. - (in game: fans spinning)
(female character) NOOOO!
(laughing) Oh God!
I don't wanna lose the guy, y'know? Guys are hard to find.
You gotta hang onto- go real slow...
No, he's going fast... Ooooh! Ooh, ooh!
How do you slow him down? (laughs)
Aaaaah!
- (female character) Whyyyyy?! - Oh my gosh, I lost the guy.
I've got him by- I-I'm holding onto him by the seat of his pants! (laughs)
OH! Not that- oh, my goodness.
Body parts.
(chuckling)
Anybody... have success with this?
- (female character groans) - Oh, God.
Aiyaiaiaiaaaaiya!
(making silly noises)
(in game) Whyyyyy?!
Ooh! There goes! There goes!
- (explosions, man yelps) - (yelps in surprise)
Why did that happen?
Oh, stop the poor guy.
(man screams in pain)
I'm killing myself over and over and over again!
- See, I'm cautious. - (explosions, woman yells)
Oh, geez! What the hell was that?!
Oh, a wrecking ball, that's nice.
Where's Miley? Put Miley on there.
(kid grunts)
- (in game: beeping) - Wha? Whoops, what's that?
- (big explosion) - (chuckles)
Well, let's use him as a speed bump. (laughing)
Up, up up up up. Easy it goes.
(chuckles) Whup, oh.
- (kid grunts) - There. Did I... Oops.
Oh. (snorts and laughs)
Don't hit the spikes, you might lose your toupee.
- (characters screaming) - Oop, oh well.
(laughing)
I think we're all dead.
Oop. He's got a concussion.
He's getting frustrated, okay?
Is there another level?
'Dad, my head.' 'I don't care!' Okay.
- (Dad) Dammit. - Quite graphic.
Horrible.
Why isn't this child in a helmet?
No, seriously, this child should be in a helmet.
Hmm.
(Dad) Dammit.
Wait a minute! What just happened?
Well, to hell with the child. Dump the kid, let's go.
Oh. (sputters)
(chuckling) This is... oh! (laughing)
This is worse.
I bet it's easier with a joystick!
(Dad) Oh, God!
'Oh, God' is right! Okay.
Good God, you guys.
Okay. OKAY, whoa whoa, nope. Doggone it.
(laughing heartily)
Oh, good gracious, Charlie Brown.
I think I gotta go faster.
Ooh.
Whew. Can't get those straight up.
Where'd he go?
This is a bloody game.
I think it's stupid.
But hey, who am I? I'm already senior. Uh, I'm past my prime. And so what do I know?
Another level, huh?
Oh you g- Are you giving me a harder - what is this, now?
- (gunshot) - Oops. Oh my God, it's a shoot-em-up.
Don't screw with the old man, I say.
- (gunshot) - Oops! Wait a minute!
I'm not ready.
- (gunshot) - (sighs frustratedly)
Stupid.
- (gunshot) - Y...
'You are DEAD'. No (bleep). My brain's flying.
- (gunshot) - Like that?
- (gunshot) - Yeah. Okay.
What's up here?
He walks like a... ballerina.
- (gunshot) - I like shoot-em-ups.
- (gunshot) - Ha ha ha. Dropped him like a bad habit.
I like the blood. I like blood.
- (gunshot) - All the blood.
- (gunshot) - Yeah, cowboy Mel.
(laughing) Getting to like shooting.
- (gunshot) - Oops!
I wouldn't do well if I was in the west, would I? (laughing)
Now, this one's a lot easier. Bingo, 'cuz it's straight line,
and you just gotta - AHH! No, I guess it wasn't that easy!
I just got my head blown off.
(snickers)
(whispering) He's gonna pop out, somebody's gonna pop out.
- (wood breaks, gunshot) - Oh! Aah!
Even though it's... gory. Uh, it's... I like this.
- (gunshot, wood breaks) - Ooh, I'll betcha...
Ah- aaah, you bastard, I saw that treehouse.
This is (sic) timing thing.
(gunshots and wood breaking)
Got 'im.
- (gunshots and wood breaking) - Aha. Yeah, I'm gettin' wise to this thing.
I'm really gettin' good.
(gunshot, bull moos)
I got double attacked there.
Yeah, this is fun.
(gunshot, bull moos)
What? (chuckles)
(breathlessly) There's a bull...
(Finebros) Let's try a simple level.
- Is there such a thing? - (Finebros) Yeah.
For kindergarten babies?
Or (bleep) seniors?
Oh, God...
I thought you said it's easier?
Those look like spikes right there, so...
What is... what do I do?
Doing this again.
Well, this one is definitely easier.
I lost my kid.
I'm just...
- (victory fanfare) - (laughs)
I like the colors.
(kid grunts, victory fanfare)
Tadaaah! (chuckling) Whoop-e-do...
- (victory fanfare) - (laughs)
That's for 3 year olds, right?
It's a no-lose situation.
Awwww, that was quick.
I'm terrible at this.
How about we go over 'em? Huh?
Yeah yeah yeah, whoop!
Ahhh! Back back back back!
Hey, hey hey hey.
Something's WRONG, oh, I gotta cross the finish line!
Ahhh, the crowd goes wild! (laughing victoriously)
It was... pretty tasteless and tacky, but it was fun.
Little much too (sic) blood for me.
I think it was incredibly stupid and I'll never play it again,
but I'm sure everybody absolutely loves it!
Yeah, I'd be hard-pressed to get into gaming.
Kids can get into this, and really do well.
My brain is supposed to be more advanced, but... it's not.
Elders would get a kick out of this.
Something to help keep their mind active and...
uh, if you're like I am, I've got neuropathy, so you know,
I'm making the fingers go - it's good for 'em, you know?
Can I try it again?
(Finebros) No, that's it Melvin, you're done.
- That's it? - (Finebros) You did it!
Just as I'm getting the swing of it, you say,
pulling the rug out from underneath me and say, "That's it, we're done!"
(raps table) Okay, be that way you guys.
See if I care.
Thanks for watching us play Happy Wheels.
Let us know in the comments what other games you'd like the Elders to take on!
New shows on this channel every week. Subscribe so you can see us!
See you later guys, I'm gonna go play some more Happy Wheels!
Not! (chuckles)