- I'm Brock, by the way.
- Brock? Oh, my God.
Was there ever more of a (beep) boy name than Brock?
(classical music)
- [Interviewer] Hi. - Hi.
- [Interviewer] What are you doing here today?
- I was told I was going to guess who is a fuckboy.
- [Interviewer] How would you define fuckboy?
- Somebody who prioritizes
maximizing the number of people they sleep with.
- They do the same things over and over again,
try and make you feel special, but have the same lines.
They're unoriginal.
- [Interviewer] Why do you think you are able to do this?
- 'Cause I've been around it a lot.
I've seen the actions dudes take to get women.
- [Interviewer] Would you say you are a fuckboy?
- No, I certainly hope not.
- [Interviewer] Do you think only men can be fuckboys?
- Absolutely not. I have been through my fuckboy stage,
but I'm pretty honest. I don't lie.
So I think fuckboys lie.
- [Interviewer] So, in addition to guessing the fuckboy,
I also want you to guess some other dating personalities.
I'm gonna bring these out to you.
Everyone you're gonna see today
self-identified with these.
- I mean, they would have to.
I was wondering how you scientifically figure that out.
- "Clingy As Fuck", "Fuckboy".
Oh, "Gender Neutral Fuckboy".
- "Habitual Ghoster"?
- What's a "Total Package"? Is that just a perfect person?
- [Interviewer] Yeah, that's like, the catch.
- No such thing.
- "Hopeless Romantic", yeah.
You don't see too much of that anymore, huh?
- "Momma's Boy". Oh, I'm a little bit of a momma's boy.
- I'm eager to meet somebody
who self-identifies as "The Crazy One."
- Yeah.
- [Interviewer] You think you're "The Crazy One"?
- Oh my gosh, yeah.
I think it's thrown too much at women sometimes,
just for having emotions and putting 'em out there,
but I am crazy.
- [Interviewer] Alright, let's bring in the line.
- It's crazy that you guys self-identify as these,
by the way. It's fuckin' nuts, man.
"The Total Package"? Who thinks that?
- Hello.
- What's your name? - Mazzy.
- You ever been in a relationship before?
- Yes. They broke up with me.
- They broke up with you. - [Mazzy] Yeah.
- Tell me about the last date you went on.
- We went to do karaoke. I sang "Say It Ain't So" by Weezer.
- "Say It Ain't So."
Not a crazy person song, not the song of a ghoster.
- Do you feel like you constantly need to be around people?
- Yes. I cannot be alone. - Cannot be alone.
- I can't be alone.
- I'm thinking "Clingy As Fuck".
- And what are you, like, looking for right now?
- Cool, funny people and sex. And that's it.
- I'm gonna give you "Habitual Ghoster".
I'm just gonna say that because
you said you're in it for sex.
- In, like, 10 years,
where do you see yourself, relationship-wise?
- I have no idea.
I definitely need to work on myself a lot
before I get there, so.
- Nice. Healthy. - [Mazzy] We'll see.
- You're not even close to crazy.
In a completely non-judgmental way,
I think you're "Clingy As Fuck". (laughing)
There you are.
- Hi. - Hi, I'm Sophie.
- Nice to meet you, I'm Ashton.
I like your outfit, you look nice,
giving Dolly Parton with them boots.
- Thank you. Sometimes I feel like a Western star,
and, you know, today's that day.
- Tell me about yourself.
- I work in tech, hobbies, photography, arts.
- You're very put-together.
- How would you think your previous partners
would describe you?
- Some of the past relationships didn't really go too well.
- Have you cheated?
- Once. I learned my lesson.
- Nah, you can't be the total package and you cheatin'.
- How would your partner describe you?
- Confident, sexy. (laughing)
Caring, a teddy bear sometimes. Yeah.
- Okay. I'm just gonna go with my gut
and say "Hopeless Romantic".
- Okay, I believe you to be, Ashton,
"The Total Package". Congratulations.
- Oh, wow.
- You're all that, and a bag of chips.
(laughing)
What's up? - Hello.
- I'm a female. We're on a first date, right?
- [Interviewer] I don't know what that is. What is it?
- I'm sipping a drink, he's not saying anything.
- [Interviewer] Oh, I didn't know what that was.
- What's your favorite thing to do on a nice, sunny day?
- On a sunny day? I kind of like, um.
I love going to Gas Works Park with my friends.
- Oh, nice.
- Is that, is that all you got?
- That's all I got. - That's all you got?
- I don't date anymore. - You don't date anymore?
- No! I already made a relationship.
Have a kid, so it's --
- Oh, you have a kid?
- Down the line, yeah. - Wow.
- That's the plan.
- How old are you? - 21.
- When was the last time you lived with your mom?
- About a year ago.
- You close with your parents?
- Yeah, my dad passed when I was 12, so it's just my mom.
- How important is the parents' view?
- Gotta guess it's an important part, 'cause you know,
I respect my mom, and, for what she's done, so.
- I'm thinking either "Total Package"
or, like, "Hopeless Romantic", 'cause it doesn't really seem
like there's much wrong with you, from what I'm seeing.
- Do you love love?
- Yeah, I love love.
- Nice. What do you like about it?
- It's beautiful, because, you know, you can --
it's always growing.
- I'm thinking "Hopeless Romantic", right now.
Could be a "Momma's Boy". You're sweet.
You know that about yourself, huh?
- I'm gonna go with "Momma's Boy"
and you have a nice face, you look well cared for.
- Thanks. (laughing)
- Hey. - How's it going?
- I like how nondescript he's dressed.
- Someone who's, like, nondescript,
what other personality traits would you associate?
- Well, they're not attention-seeking.
I think a fuckboy wants the attention,
because attention would maximize
the likelihood that they are able to fuck, right?
- How would you describe yourself in a relationship?
- Very loving.
I'm usually the role of, like, the listener.
- There you are, sir.
- Why are you saying clingy?
- It was a couple of things he said, like,
he's a good listener.
The most clingy partners I've had
have also been good listeners.
And also just "loving", 'kay?
- Why, why'd you put quotations around "loving"?
- Oh, that's my own personal trauma.
- Mmm.
- Are you mingling? - I mean, no. (laughing)
The last relationship did not end super well.
She just kinda came outta nowhere and broke up with me, man.
You know?
- I think "Hopeless Romantic" is like, the best one,
so, yeah. - Yeah?
- There you go. Confidence with the fuckin' chain,
I don't know about that.
But you look cool.
- I'm Brock, by the way
- Brock? Oh, my God.
Was there ever more of a fuckboy name than Brock?
(all laughing)
What's your ideal date? Like, describe it.
- Probably like, a hike.
You're getting out there, but also
there's lots of room to talk.
- Right, right.
- [Brock] Get to know each other.
- Talking.
Communicative, not characteristic of a fuckboy.
- What is your relationship status right now?
- I am currently in a relationship.
- How long have you been in that relationship?
- Two years. - Two years.
Wow. That's awesome, how's it going?
- Were you expecting less?
- No, that's awesome. Good for you, Brock.
- Thank you.
- I'm gonna give you "Total Package", because
you are the one who's been in a relationship the longest.
- Okay.
- Alright, I'mma say "Momma's Boy".
- Hello. Tell me about yourself.
- Go out a lot, I like to go to EDM Festivals.
- You go out a lot, you go to a lot of raves.
- Yeah. (laughing) - Oh, wild.
Wild and crazy.
- Huh, okay, and what is your relationship status right now?
- Single, but still seeing my ex.
- Are you dating other people as well, or just your ex?
- Not really dating, maybe just, like, fucking to cope.
- Wow. Powerful. - Yeah.
- That should be on a shirt, "fucking to cope."
Avery, what are some of your toxic traits?
- I can be manipulative sometimes.
Yeah. (laughing)
- I'm feeling similar vibes, here.
- [Interviewer] Okay.
- I am gonna go with fuckboy,
because when they walked in, TBH,
I thought it was either her or Brock, so.
Sorry, Brock. (Avery laughing)
- You ever cheat? - No.
- So how would you feel if somebody did?
- You know the fish sauce? - Mm-hm.
- Probably pour it in their car.
- Man, yeah, you "The Crazy One", girl.
Go ahead, take that. (Avery laughing)
- Avery, you're "The Crazy One". Congrats.
- Okay, next.
(all laughing)
- Alright. - Hello.
- Hello.
- I'm Dusty, and apparently "The Crazy One".
- It wasn't 'cause I was looking down the line,
I just, this has been a real trip.
- How long, like, after you meet someone,
would you want to have sex?
- I'm demi-sexual, so, like -- - Oh, okay.
- - if I am interested in them emotionally and stuff,
yeah, I'm totally down to have sex right then and there.
Couple months ago was the first time
I went out with another person again.
- A couple months ago. - Mm-hm.
How long was the interval time you waited?
- It was like, three years.
- Before you went on a date ever again?
- [Dusty] Yeah.
- Oh my God.
You are not a fuckboy.
- [Interviewer] Okay. (Dusty laughing)
Go ahead and hop back in line.
Alright, how do you think you did?
- I think I did all right.
Somewhere along, like, these first three,
I definitely messed up somewhere.
- Maybe I got three right,
and if I'm being optimistic, four?
- Raise your hand if Sophie got you right.
- Oh.
- What? Only got one right?
- Okay. Okay. Yeah, nice, okay.
I'm happy about that one.
- Go ahead and switch signs...
to the sign that's yours.
- Yeah, I knew, I knew it. I knew it.
- See, I knew I messed up with her.
- I didn't wanna --
Okay.
- "The Crazy One". - Yes.
- Man, you really got me on that.
Alright, what makes you crazy?
- Um, I'm just bipolar and I never take the medication.
- Are you trying to take ownership over that word?
- Yeah, I think like, you know, with a lot of words
that are like, taboo, to use now,
people who associate are trying to take back those words
and, like, you know,
"crazy" is one of 'em. - [Sophie] Yeah.
- How do you feel about that word being thrown around,
"crazy"?
- I think people don't use it how I would use it.
Like, people generally use "crazy" like,
"Oh, you're gonna key my car." You know.
Not that I have done that, but --
- Right, slash your tires.
- Exactly.
- I knew it. I knew it.
Like, as soon you walked back, I wanted to switch it.
- Really? - Yeah.
It's because you were so hard to read,
and oftentimes, like, when you're a fuckboy
and you have operations like that
then you can become hard to read.
- Sounds stupid to say after the fact,
but I also had a feeling
because of the way they looked at me.
- [Interviewer] How did they look at you?
There was a little bit of, like, sizing up.
- I mean, I looked at you, yeah.
(Ashton laughing)
- What makes you a fuckboy?
- I think it's the confidence aspect,
and I would be direct and tell them certain things.
And if you don't take my words for face value,
then that is a you problem.
Not my job.
- Oof.
- When I approach somebody, I give 'em those eyes
and I'm like, "Yo, you gonna go out today?"
- Can I see the eyes?
- So I saw you doing that --
- Huh? What? - Oh, hi. Hi.
- Hi.
- You really like that drink a lot.
- I hate this drink.
- You hate it?
You should buy another one.
- I should buy another one?
You're coming up to me and asking me to buy my -- ?
- I mean, I'm telling you, if you hate it, why not, why?
Change it. - You're right.
- Here with friends or anything?
- I'm alone. - You're alone.
- I brought a book.
- I don't know if I wanna talk to you.
(all laughing)
- "Momma's Boy", got him right!
First of all, I love a self-proclaimed momma's boy.
I'm a mom, and those kind of boys who don't recognize it
try and make me their mom, and that's not cute.
- What's your favorite memory with your mother?
- I would wake up when I was a kid.
She would make me a butter and jelly sandwich --
- Oh, beautiful.
- Yeah, we would just talk.
I don't know why I remember that, but I remember that.
- Because it's special to you. Core memory.
- There's nothing wrong with being a momma's boy, though.
I consider myself a little bit of one, so.
You got me.
- Tre. I get you right?
- Oh, yeah.
- What makes you a hopeless romantic?
- I'm not really trying to play around.
- Alright. Oh, you trying to find someone serious.
- Get to know somebody, you know what I mean?
- Yeah, yeah.
Are you the type to bring flowers and candies and all that?
- Dude, I mean, come on. Yeah.
I'm a musician, I like to sing for 'em, too.
- Oh, you're a musician too? That's dope, man.
- I feel like this phrase
comes with some weird connotations sometimes.
I feel like people use this term to, like,
make themselves look better
when they are somebody that needs to work on themselves.
- Hmm.
- What's up, you fuckin' dick?
I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. (laughing)
- Would like to point out,
I was told I would fit this by my girlfriend.
- I was gonna ask --
- I think you were saving "Fuckboy" for me, though.
- I was saving it, but like, after talking to you, honestly,
like, I don't, I didn't get that vibe.
- [Brock] Okay.
- I think you're a cool dude.
And I think that you probably have
a lot of positive qualities.
I think that nobody is "The Total Package".
- I would, I would agree.
Kind of a synonym would be, like, a good partner.
- Right.
- And that's what I kind of identify as,
just trying to nonstop better myself
and respect her boundaries and herself as a person, and...
- I'd date you, dude. You're killing it.
- I'm taken, but.
(laughing)
- Clingy as fuck.
Damn. I was close, though.
- You're not crazy, you're clingy.
- Yeah.
- Sisters, those two.
"Clingy" and "crazy".
What makes you clingy?
- I get, like, separation anxiety a lot.
- Yeah. You're like a puppy.
- Yeah, like a lost puppy.
- But does your ex-boyfriend know this is you, like?
- Yeah, he knows.
Even though I had my own car,
I would make him drive me to work
just to be in the car with me.
- So, to be honest, I just think she knows her worth,
so, good for you, I think you should keep
making the men in your life put in work to make you happy.
- Exactly.
- Nice to meet you. Avery.
Thank you. - You too.
- This comes as a shock to me.
- Like, now that I see you with that tag,
I kind of see where it's like,
"Oh, if you're not emotionally attached, I'm outta here."
- Exactly.
I feel like I used to act a lot more like a fuckboy
but the ghoster has always been the thing that stayed
'cause I'd be like, "Hey, let's do things!"
and then the next day I'm like, never mind.
I have kind of three strikes rules,
someone hurts me two times, three times,
I'm like, okay. I never speak to you again.
- Ah. You ghost, but only as a consequence of mistreatment.
- Yeah, I'd say so. - Right.
- It's just so much easier when you're the one deciding.
- Right, right. Okay.
(music flourishing)
- [Interviewer] Who surprised you the most?
- Ashton surprised me the most,
"The Gender Neutral Fuckboy".
When I hear the term "fuckboy",
I'm well aware that it can span the strata of demographic
but, immediately, an image pops to mind.
And that image looks very different
than what Ashton looks like.
- I think we're all kind of those things at one time,
so it was hard for me to identify,
and you can't really judge people by how they'd look.
Not all fuckboys look like Brock.
- I think everybody was cool and everybody was chill
and even the ones who had problems
seemed like they recognized it
and they were trying to go further,
and as long as you trying to go further,
that's the first step in healing, so.
And I saw elements of my myself within everybody, everybody.
So I felt like I could learn something
from them and their experiences.