>>> YOU'RE WATCHING CINEMA CLASSICS ON TBS.
>> GOOD HALLOWS EVE TO YOU. I AM REESE DE'WHAT.
AND DE'WHAT'S THAT BEHIND YOU? I'M JUST KIDDING.
TONIGHT, WE TAKE A LOOK AT ALFRED HITCHCOCK'S 1963 HORROR
THRILLER "THE BIRDS." STARRING TIPPI HEDREN AS A WOMAN
MENACED BY BIRDS FOR REASONS THAT ARE NEVER EXPLAINED.
[ LAUGHTER ] WHY DID HITCHCOCK NOT CLARIFY
WHAT THE BIRDS WERE UP TO? I DO NOT KNOW.
I AM A BAD GUESSER. JUST ASK MY WIFE, WHO ASKED ME
TO GUESS WHAT SHE WAS GOING TO BE FOR HALLOWEEN AND I SAID, I
DON'T KNOW, DRUNK ON RUM? [ LAUGHTER ]
WORST DOUBLE BUBBLE BATH EVER! [ LAUGHTER ]
LET'S LOOK NOW AT A RECENTLY UNEARTHED ALTERNATE SCENE IN
WHICH HITCHCOCK TRIES TO REALLY SPELL OUT WHAT'S GOING ON WITH
"THE BIRDS," HERE WE GO. ♪♪
>> OH, OH! AH, AH!
OPERATOR, OPERATOR, GET ME THE SHERIFF.
>> THIS IS SHERIFF MCCAFFERTY, WHAT'S THE EMERGENCY?
>> BIRDS! [ LAUGHTER ]
>> I'M SORRY, DID YOU JUST GENTLY WHISPER THE WORD "BIRDS"?
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? >> IT MEANS BIRDS.
THEY'RE TRYING TO KILL EVERYBODY.
YOU'VE GOT TO DO SOMETHING, PLEASE.
THESE BIRDS! >> HAS ANYONE SAID, SHOO, GET
OUT OF HERE, BIRDS, WITH A HAND WAVE?
>> NO, NO, THERE'S TOO MANY OF THEM AND THEY'RE TOO MEAN.
>> OKAY, SO THESE ARE BIRDS OF PREY, LIKE A HAWK OR AN EAGLE?
>> NO. NO, THEY'RE SEAGULLS.
YOU KNOW, THE LITTLE GUYS THAT EAT FRENCH FRIES AT THE BEACH.
OH, NO, LOOK! THEY SET FIRE TO THE GAS
STATION! >> HOW?
>> SIR, I CANNOT EXPLAIN. >> NO, NO, NO, NO.
YOU JUST SAID A BIRD SET FIRE TO A GAS STATION, SO YOU NEED TO
EXPLAIN THAT TO ME. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> MAYBE THE BIRDS HAD A CIGARETTE FROM SOMEONE AND THEN
SLAPPED IT INTO THE GAS TANK, I DON'T KNOW.
>> NOW WHAT'S HAPPENING? >> THE BIRDS, THEY JUST BIRDED A
MAN TO DEATH. [ LAUGHTER ]
OH, NO! ONE OF THE BIRDS FOUND A GLASS
CUTTER! NO, PLEASE!
IT'S GOT A KNIFE! PLEASE DO SOMETHING, THE BIRDS
WEREN'T RAISED RIGHT! >> MA'AM, YOU'RE HYSTERICAL.
THERE IS NO WAY THIS IS HAPPENING ALL BECAUSE OF A BUNCH
OF NO-GOOD -- I HAVE TO CALL YOU BACK.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> WOW.
I GOT TO TELL YOU, THOUGH. TEST AUDIENCES POSITIVELY HATED
THIS NEW VERSION. ALMOST AS MUCH AS MY WIFE HATES
VACUUMING. YOU KNOW WHAT?
I'M SORRY, THAT IS NOT FAIR. SHE IS A GOOD WOMAN.
STILL WORRIED AUDIENCES WOULD NOT BE SCARED ENOUGH BY BIRDS,
HITCHCOCK FILMED YET ANOTHER VERSION OF THE SCENE, ADDING
EVEN MORE SOURCES OF POTENTIAL TERROR.
LET'S WATCH. >> THANK GOD YOU CAME!
THESE ARE THE BIRDS THAT ARE DOING IT ALL!
>> I'M VERY SORRY I DOUBTED YOU, THE BIRDS ARE TRYING TO BE VERY
MEAN. >> WHAT'S THAT ONE DOING?
IT'S RECORDING US! >> OH, AN EGG!
IT'S TRYING TO BE NICE SO WE HAVE BREAKFAST.
>> NO, THEY'RE TRYING TO MAKE MORE BIRDS.
>> I'M GOING TO START SHOOTING MY GUN OFF IN HERE AND SEE WHAT
HAPPENS. >> OH, YOU DUMMY, YOU'LL KILL
US! AND IT'S TOO LATE.
THE BIRDS HAVE PICKED UP TURTLES TO USE.
>> MY GOD THEY'RE PUTTING THE TURTLES ON PEOPLE!
>> WE'RE ON THE PHONE, WE'RE ON THE PHONE!
>> OH, NO, THE TURTLES HAVE NOW PICKED UP SANDWICHES!
>> OH, I GET IT. THE TURTLES ARE BULLYING THE
SANDWICHES LIKE THE BIRDS BULLIED THEM.
IT'S A CYCLE. >> WELL, NOW, THE TURTLES HAVE
LEARNED TO FLY WITHOUT THE HELP OF THE BIRDS.
>> AS HAVE THE SANDWICHES. >> IS THIS THE LESSON ABOUT
MAN'S LACK OF RESPECT FOR NATURE?
>> I DON'T KNOW. DAMMIT, I DON'T KNOW, BUT KISS
ME. >> WHAT?
NO! >> GAH!
>> ULTIMATELY, THIS ULTIMATE SCENE WAS SCRAPPED AFTER AN
ASSISTANT EDITOR POINTED OUT THAT IT ADDED OVER A DAY TO THE
FILM'S TOTAL RUNNING TIME. HAPPY HALLOWEEN, EVERYONE!
FOR CINE CLASSICS, I HAVE BEEN REESE DE'WHAT.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]