Ahoy ladies!
I didn't see you there.
Would you guys like to set sail
on this ocean of flavor with me?
I'll be your captain.
I'm Steve Harrington.
(funky music)
Come on, are you really saying
you don't want to hang out with Maeve Wiley?
She's cool, and she's the best kind of cool
because no one in this place even knows it yet.
(funky music)
Anyways this was like so fun.
We should kinda like, you know.
I don't know, maybe hang out this weekend or something.
Oh, sorry about that.
Uh, I don't know, maybe next weekend or...?
Yeah, I'm busy.
Oh that's cool, I'm working here next weekend so...
the following weekend's better for me.
Ah, no.
I'm sorry, I can't.
Okay, thanks.
I...
This is my first day here.
(sighs)
How was it with the boy?
Anti-climatic.
I think I want to concentrate on myself for a while.
That's my girl.
You're too smart to be chasing silly boys around.
(tense music)
Am I dreaming or is that you, Harrington?
Yeah it's me, don't cream your pants.
That's good.
Just show her you don't care.
I don't.
Why are you winking, Steve?
Stop.
I baked a cake.
Why didn't you say it was your birthday?
Because I hate birthdays.
No one hates birthdays, Maeve.
Why celebrate the day I got pushed out of some
random vagina against my will?
Hot tubs aren't really my thing.
What is your thing then?
Complex female characters.
I dunno, I just feel like you're
trying way too hard, man.
Well not everyone can have your perfect hair, all right?
It's not about the hair, man. The key with girls
is just acting like you don't care.
Even if you do?
Yeah exactly, it drives them nuts.
How's it going knob-zilla?
He can't come.
He faked it.
You're sure?
I don't know what I'm doing wrong.
Maybe he was nervous or something.
Ruby and Olivia think I should dump him.
They say he's bringing down my social status, but...
Don't know why you listen to those dickheads.
If you like him, do what you want.
(Steve screaming) (dramatic music)
Dude!
You did it, you won a fight!
I said, nice rack, Wiley.
(laughs)
Say that again.
Nice rac-
(groaning)
Maybe if we set this on fire.
No yeah, that's a no.
The mind-flayer would call away his army.
- They'd all come to stop us. - Hey.
- Then we circle back to the exit-
- Guys- - By the time they
realize we're gone. - El would be at the gate.
- Hey, hey hey!
This is not happening.
- But- - No, no, no, no, no, no buts.
I promised I'd keep you shit-heads safe
and that's exactly what I plan on doing,
does everybody understand?
Turns out I'm actually a pretty damn good babysitter.
Come on, then.
(laughs)
No, no no no no, oh oh, no no no
not today, not today, okay.
Where've you been?
I was outside having a fag.
Okay, well you can't leave her
on her own because she's three.
Ugh, she's fine.
Okay, fairy costume, yeah, here we go.
(gentle music)
Well done, that's it.
Have you...
ever been in love?
(giggling) (soft music)
My god, take those stupid things off.
I missed you.
It's been like an hour.
Tell me about it.
Yep, Nancy Wheeler, first semester, senior year.
(mimics gunshot)
You know in RomComs when the guy
finally realizes he's in love with the girl?
And he turns up with a boombox outside her house,
blasting her favorite song
and everyone in the audience swoons.
Yeah, that makes me sick.
(laughs)
Okay but seriously,
what's wrong with a boyfriend?
It's just someone else to let you down, isn't it?
(funky music)