Top Banned Baby Names
23.
Medicare Number The Australian Registry of Births, Deaths,
and Marriages made a serious decision.
They decided that you cannot use your Medicare Number as your baby’s name.
It is illegal.
You may have strong feelings about your Medicare number.
It might remind you of your little one in ways that no one else can imagine.
The symbolism may be deep and personal, but it doesn’t matter.
You’re simply out of luck there, mate.
22.
Fish and Chips In a two-for-one rebuttal, “Fish” and
“Chips” were rejected by the New Zealand authorities as the names for a pair of twins.
You’re free, however, to name the family dog “tartar sauce”.
I’m also guessing “Ham” and “Eggs” probably wouldn’t fly.
21.
iMac, Panties, and Snort Some Australians want to name their child
“iMac” or “Panties.”
No kidding.
But the government is there to stop them, at least from a legal standpoint.
Parents can’t legally name their offspring “Snort,” but it is hard to keep them from
calling their little ones that at home.
20.
@ Many countries have limitations on permitted
characters in legal names.
Most do not allow numerals or special characters or symbols.
There is an interesting parallel in the Chinese language to the ubiquitous “at” sign (@). In
Chinese, this @ sign is pronounced “ai-ta” and means, roughly, “love him.”
To one couple, this was a beautiful sentiment and a fitting name for their son.
So they attempted to call him “@.“ The Chinese government said “no.”
19.
Hermione, Harry Potter, and Facebook The civil registry, in the State of Sonora,
in northern Mexico, does not allow parents to name their children just anything they
want.
The authorities in Sonora have developed a list of at least 61 names that parent cannot
register for their offspring because the State deems them “derogatory, pejorative, discriminatory
or lacking in meaning.”
Cristina Ramirez, the civil registry’s Director, states the objective of the list as being
“to protect children from being bullied because of their name.”
She goes on to say that the State wants to do “what we can from our area of responsibility.”
Although the Mexican civil registries have tried informally to steer parents away from
names that the State didn’t approve of, Ramirez said that this was not enough, in
her experience.
Ramirez goes on to say that “some people are saying we are attacking the liberty of
parents.
We think the names attack the superior interests of the child.”
The State presumably believes it is the holder of the rights of the child rather than the
parents.
Mexican parents have a long history of assigning unusual names to their children.
They seem to continue to believe this is their right.
Someday perhaps this will be settled in court.
Often otherwise ordinary names are banned, such as Hermione, because in some places popular
culture has put a stigma upon it.
Other names are clearly considered inappropriate for a child’s name, such as Hitler, Email,
Escroto (Scrotum), Batman, Robocop, Burger King, and Terminator.
Harry Potter and Facebook are also on the do-not-call-your-baby-this list.
18.
Monkey If you name your child “Monkey” in Denmark,
you’ll be in big trouble.
Denmark’s Law on Personal Names prohibits it.
Parents get 7000 names to choose from, and otherwise, they have to petition the government
for special permission to choose the name of their child.
The law was designed to protect children from strange names, ridicule, or “a parent’s
lapse in judgment or their misguided attempts to be hip.”
Names must accurately conform to the appropriate gender.
17.
Nutella France has decided to limit the names that
children can have.
A French judge ruled against the name “Nutella” for the daughter of a French couple who wanted
her name to reflect the popularity and sweetness of the sugary hazelnut treat.
The judge’s reasoning was that the name would incite “mockery and disobliging remarks.”
He imposed a shortening of the name to the more vanilla “Ella.”
16.
Daemon “Daemon,” as an alternate spelling of
“Damon,” has been banned in France.
The French authorities didn’t feel that it sounded French.
Rather, when Lionel and Blandine Defontaine named their son Daemon, the authorities ruled
that it sounds demonic.
The Defontaines (D-fawn-tins) were ordered to change their baby’s first name.
But the Defontaines resisted and went to court, saying that the name Daemon demonstrated no
devilish overtones.
They fought the law and won.
In a rare victory, the baby was allowed to keep his name, the little demon.
15.
Schroeder The Charlie Brown character “Schroeder”
could not be named as such in Germany.
Under regulations, all child names must be approved by the Office of Vital Statistics
and “they cannot be given family names as first names.”
Apparently “Schroeder” is a German family name, therefore illegal in that country as
a baby’s first name.
But how good are the Schroders at playing the piano?
14.
Duncan and Harriet Money talks in Iceland.
If the baby name you want isn’t on the existing National Register of Persons, you can pay
a fee and wait to see if the government will approve it.
The baby name will then go through a rigorous procedure to see if it meets Iceland’s criteria
for acceptance.
First, it must not potentially lead to humiliation.
It must have characteristics peculiar to Iceland, such as only including letters from the Icelandic
alphabet and being able to conform grammatically to the Icelandic language.
Visitors are often greatly inconvenienced by such regulations.
If you are unfortunate enough to have a “C” in your name, you’re out of luck, or so
young Duncan found out.
The Icelandic 32-letter alphabet does not include the letter “C.” Who knew?
Not Duncan’s parents.
His name was legally banned, and his parents couldn’t get a passport in his name.
His sister Harriet found out that her name cannot be conjugated in Icelandic.
Her passport couldn’t be renewed in her name, either.
So what finally happened?
Passports were issued to the two children, which listed their names as “Boy” and
“Girl.”
13.
Venerdi Italy’s name regulations are a little different.
There are limits when names are “likely to limit social interaction and create insecurity.”
One Italian judge prohibited a couple from naming their child “Venerdi,” which is
the Italian word for “Friday.”
The judge feared that the child would be mocked.
The parents were forced to change the boy’s name, and they did so.
They changed their son’s first name to “Mercoledi,” the Italian word for “Wednesday.”
The judge was not amused.
The court ruled that the reference to “Friday” was the servant in Daniel Defoe’s novel
“Robinson Crusoe,” and the child shouldn’t be “characterized by his role of subjection
and inferiority.”
12.
Akuma There was controversy in the Japanese Prime
Minister’s cabinet when the Justice Minister reacted negatively to the government’s intervention
in a baby naming case.
A Japanese couple named their baby “Akuma,” which means “devil” in Japanese.
The government stepped in and sought to make the name illegal.
The Justice Minister spoke out, saying, “It is not appropriate to instruct parents to
change children’s names without legal basis.”
Just what is the legal basis that governments use to change a parent’s naming decision?
The Justice Minister couldn’t find one.
But naming a baby “Akuma” became illegal in Japan.
11.
Apple The naming of children after fruits, animals,
and vegetables is illegal in Malaysia.
So, apparently is naming them after computer companies.
“Apple” is one of the banned names in this country.
Apparently, this is a core principle.
10.
Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii Another New Zealand request might have set
a record, possibly for longest baby name attempt.
But the New Zealand authorities were not amused and assumed full guardianship of the child
when it was discovered that the parents wanted to call the nine-year-old girl this whopper:
“Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii.”
That’s the real name submitted for approval.
Makes you wonder.
9.Gesher Gesher doesn’t seem such a bad name for
a child.
Norway didn’t think so, though, and disallowed it.
In fact, they sent the mother to jail and fined her $420 for using the unauthorized
name.
But the mother protested, saying that she had an excuse.
She had been told to use the Hebrew name for bridge — Gesher — as the first name for
her son, in a dream.
But Norway takes the regulation of their citizen’s baby names quite seriously, hence the severe
punishments.
8.
Nirvana If you have to name a child and don’t like
lists, don’t have your baby in Portugal.
Portugal has a list at least 80 pages long detailing which baby names are legal and which
are illegal.
There are over 2000 names in the banned section.
“Nirvana” is one of them, both the band and the state of mind.
“Mona Lisa,” too, is forbidden, as is “Hendrix.”
In general, the authorities discard anything without a distinctly Portuguese flavor.
“Kathleen” is right out.
There is no “Pablo,” interestingly enough.
You cannot name your child “Sayonara,” “Viking,” “Rhianna,” or “Portugal.”
We have yet to see the list of allowed names.
That should be interesting.
7.
Elaine “Contradicting the religion or culture of
the kingdom” of Saudi Arabia, a Muslim country, is what drives the limits of baby naming in
the kingdom.
An ordinary English sounding name, such as “Elaine,” would be banned, especially
since it is associated with an irreverent American comedy television show.
Other average Western-sounding names include Maya, Linda, Alice, Lauren, and Sandy.
6.
Christ and Satan In Victoria, Australia, there are 46 names
on the forbidden baby names list.
“Christ” is one.
So is “Emperor,” “Cadet,” “Chief,” “Constable,” “God,” “Majesty,”
“Sergeant,” “Sister, “Satan,” “Sir,” and “Prince.”
I’m guessing “The Artist Formerly Known As” is also off the table.
There are 34 more, at least.
But it’s good to know that there are no Australians named “Satan” running around.
It could prove awkward in certain social settings.
5.
Metallica and Elvis You can go nude in Sweden, but you can’t
name your baby “Metallica.”
At least you couldn’t for a while, as the Swedish courts ruled against a couple in 2007.
In a rare victory, however, the parents appealed the decision and were successful.
Baby Metallica kept its name.
It wouldn’t have been so lucky if the parent’s had tried “Elvis.”
That name is banned.
At least for girls.
4.
Staalman Another Swedish no-no is “Staalman,” the
Swedish name for Superman.
Literally it means “man of steel.”
This name choice came about because the baby was born with one arm in the air, just like
Superman.
The boy’s mother, Sara, wanted the Swedish “Staalman” to represent her first impression
of him, just as Native Americans name things after the first item they see after the birth
of the baby.
However, the Swedish authorities are not so romantic as the Native Americans or Sara.
The name Staalman was rejected.
3.
BRFX...
I'm not even going to attempt that Sweden has naming laws in place to protect
their nobles from the non-nobles naming their children with names that only rightfully belong
to the nobles.
They are very sticky about this.
The law reads “first names shall not be approved if they can cause offense or can
be supposed to cause discomfort for the one using it, or names which for some obvious
reason are not suitable as a first name.”
The law is rather vague.
One couple protested the government's limits and submitted the name “BRFXXCCXXMNPCCCCLLLMMNPRXVCLMNCKSSQLBB11116.”
“It's pronounced ‘Albin,’” they said.
The name was rejected.
So they resubmitted the name written as a single capital “A,” with the same pronunciation.
That was denied as well.
It seems there’s no pleasing the authorities.
Sweden is very strict, despite the vagueness of its laws.
You can't snow them.
2.
Anal In New Zealand, all parents have to get all
baby names pre-authorized.
If the government doesn’t like a name, for whatever reason, they add it to the ever-growing
banned-baby-name list.
A seemingly appropriate addition to this list was the suggested name “Anal.”
What kind of name is that for a child?
In 2013, it was formally requested by a child's parents.
1.
Osama Bin Ldn In Cologne, Germany, a Turkish couple wanted
to commemorate the 9/11/2001 attacks on the Twin Towers in New York, United States, by
naming their son Osama Bin L.
This name is prohibited by German law, as foreign names that are illegal in the parent’s
home country are illegal in Germany.
This infamous name is against the law in Turkey.
What’s more, the Germans have baby-naming guidelines which state that child names “must
not be likely to lead to humiliation.”
The authorities in Germany felt that this particular name indeed broke the guidelines,
on many levels.
The naming was denied.