From time to time, I see stories that make me think,
"Damn, it is good
to be white in America."
'Cause I know a lot of white people are hurting right now,
but white people can also get away with shit
in this country that nobody else could.
So, you know, what, I think there are some times
when we just got to take a moment to appreciate it
and be like, "Yo, man,
you're so lucky you're white."
? ?
Tonight's story takes place in Staten Island,
which is a little pocket of red America
inside deep blue New York City. You know, like
if Elmo drowned at sea.
And the lucky white person at the center of this story
is Danny Presti,
bar manager and hairy egg.
His luck began a week ago when he found the courage
to take a stand against staying alive.
NEWSWOMAN: For a small bar on Staten Island,
Mac's Public House has become a national lightning rod
in the pandemic lockdown.
When the southern portion of Staten Island
went into the orange zone last month,
the owner of Mac's Public House
said he could not afford to close again,
so he declared his property an autonomous zone.
NEWSWOMAN 2: He's posted statements on the windows
refusing to abide by any rules and regulations
put forth by the mayor of New York City
and the governor.
(chanting): Open up! Open up!
NEWSWOMAN 3: Hundreds of protesters
outside the now infamous Mac's Public House
on Staten Island tonight
demanding it open for business.
(chanting): U.S.A.! U.S.A.! U.S.A.!
We are a community.
We take back our community.
We're all together.
We take back Staten Island tonight!
Okay, right away, I think we can all agree
that this dude is behaving very, uh, white. Yes.
Because it's a very white thing to do
to just declare yourself an independent
if you don't like the law.
I mean, the American Revolution
was basically white guys saying,
"I'll drink tea when I want to drink tea.
"Goddamn it. The queen's gonna tell me it's high tea.
"I want... What if I want low tea?
"Or no tea?
What about coffee?"
Not to mention,
he just declared himself autonomous
in front of an American flag.
I love these kinds of people, man.
They always want it both ways.
"America is tyrannical,
"so I declare myself independent.
U.S.A.!"
But for real, man.
White people never cease to amaze me.
I mean, they will follow all the rules
of Escape the Room to the letter,
but the moment you ask them to wear a mask,
they turn into freedom fighters.
Where was that freedom-loving attitude
when I try to pick the lock
instead of searching for clues, huh, Chad?
Huh, Chad?!
Now, eventually, the police did come to shut down this bar,
and that, my friends,
is when Danny Presti's luck really started.
NEWSMAN: That defiant general manager
of a Staten Island bar was released without bail
after he was arrested
for hitting a sheriff's deputy with his car.
This weekend, deputies tried to arrest Danny Presti
after he allowed people to gather at Mac's Public House
when it was supposed to be shut down.
When they followed him up the block to his car,
they say he ran and drove off,
hitting a deputy, who rolled onto his hood.
And despite this surveillance video that shows the incident,
Presti has a different version of what happened.
I think when the investigation is complete,
you're gonna find out that I did nothing wrong.
Ooh-wee!
That dude is so lucky he's white.
(chuckles): Yo, can you imagine?
Cops say you hit one of them with your car,
and then you get released without bail.
No bail! (chuckles)
Best believe if he was Black,
those cops would've dragged him out of his car,
beat the shit out of him
and then beat the shit out of his car.
And you got to appreciate how he's saying,
"When the investigation is complete,
you'll see that I did nothing wrong."
My man, you're on video.
The investigation's over. It lasted five seconds.
My eyes just did the investigation,
and they saw your ass drive into some police.
Case closed.
So, instead of being punished for plowing into a cop,
this guy gets away with it like he's in Grand Theft Auto.
And it's even better than that. At least in Grand Theft Auto,
you got to go into hiding for a bit before you're safe.
But no, this guy immediately went to brag about it
on Fox News.
And I'm looking at your business,
and you're getting killed.
And these restrictions...
I mean, do people really understand
your heart, life and soul is involved in this, sir?
Now, I just want to say, I applaud
a lot of these small business owners
that peacefully, uh, push back against this,
because, uh, they have no other recourse.
What it just goes to show you is people are frustrated,
and they're protective,
and they feel like the government
is not looking out for them.
HANNITY: I don't know if I should reveal this, Danny,
but I actually know cops that are telling you privately,
whispering in your ear
they don't want to do this to you.
Th-Th-They're being forced to.
And I'm really sorry
that you're going through all this, to be very honest.
Damn, boy, you so lucky you white.
This dude has a whole network apologizing to him
for running over a policeman.
A policeman!
This is not just any network but Fox News.
Fox always stands with cops against Black people,
but when it's a white guy, suddenly, Fox goes,
"Uh, breaking news. (bleep) the police.
Smoke weed every day."
They even told him
he was peacefully pushing back
when he was pushing with his car!
Yo, are you serious right now?
When Black people just walk in the street,
Fox calls it a riot.
But this white guy drives into a cop,
a police officer,
an officer of the law, and Fox News is like,
"Now, this is a... this is a hit-and-run.
"This is a hit-and-run that Martin Luther King Jr.
would have been proud of."
But I've got one question for you, Fox News.
what happened to Blue Lives Matter?
Huh? What happened to Blue Lives Matter?
I guess technically, it's Blue Lives Matter
is above Black Lives Matter,
but the number one thing is white lives matter.
So, there you have it.
This guy declares himself above the law,
hosts potential super-spreader parties at his bar,
treats the police like bowling pins,
and now he's a Fox News hero.
There's nothing else to say except, my man,
you're so lucky you're white.