Ladies and gentlemen, it is time to play the Midnight Gameshow.
CHEERING
Oh, yes.
The contestants of the Midnight Gameshow have been set up
by their partner, who give me the key to their home.
In the dead of night, I sneak in and wake them up
to answer a series of questions.
This is the only game show where if you snooze...
ALL: You lose!
Tonight's contestant is Jane.
Jane, where are you?
There's Jane, ladies and gentlemen, it's Jane and Colin.
Oh, Jane.
Oh, we've met before...
We have. ..haven't we, Jane?
And, Colin, you weren't wearing...
Were you wearing any clothes?
I was.
Certainly not on the top half.
So, it's lovely to see you.
What I should tell the audience right now, is that Jane,
without a shadow of a doubt,
has the best laugh
of anybody I've ever met in my entire life.
SHE GUFFAWS
Yes.
LAUGHTER
Now, Colin, of course, you were there, shirtless,
which was an extraordinary thing to behold.
SHE GUFFAWS
See what I mean?
OK, so you were a primary school teacher.
Yes, for 35 years, I was a...
For 35 years. For 35 years.
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
It would have been so fun to be in Jane's class. Thank you.
Now I just wanted to share that information
because you did struggle a little bit with some more basic questions.
It's the taking part that matter, isn't it?
Yes.
OK. All right, Jane, so...
I'm excited to see this.
Ladies and gentlemen, let's enjoy Jane's Midnight Gameshow.
CHEERING
LAUGHTER
FLOORBOARDS CREAK
LAUGHTER
FLOORBOARDS CREAK, LAUGHTER
Jane!
Welcome!
To the Midnight Gameshow! What?
Hiya, Jane. THEY LAUGH
Nice to meet you.
And this is Colin.
Hey, Col? How are you?
Fast asleep, eh? This is the Midnight Gameshow.
We're going to ask you questions, Jane,
and you're going to do your best to answer them.
You up for this? Yeah, yeah.
Name three types of pasta.
Erm...
Go on, Jane, you can do it.
Oh, God, I can't think of any, er...
I know, it's very difficult.
You were sound asleep moments ago.
Pasta.
Oh, er... Here we go.
That flat one.
Pasta, the flat one. Lasagne. No, no, no.
Lasagne, pasta.
We'll take lasagne, yes, correct.
Er, spaghetti.
Correct, easy.
One more.
It's going really well now.
Come on, Jane.
No, you can't tell me.
No, shhhh. Colin, enough.
Shut up!
LAUGHTER
Thank you for that, my co-host and contestant...
All right, Colin you can help subtly.
Tagliatelle.
No, that's not helping subtly, that's saying the answer.
OK, tagliatelle.
OK, we're going to need to turn the lights off.
What I'm going to ask you to do now is to identify this ghost.
I'm going to give you some clues,
his first name begins with D.
Any ideas?
HE LAUGHS
Surely that's obvious! All right.
He has a very, very successful television show
that started on Living TV.
He would be incredible at this game.
Now, you can ask your own questions.
Have you got any brothers and sisters?
That's a brilliant question! LAUGHTER
We're going to be here a while!
Sorry? What's the answer? Yes.
He does have brothers and sisters,
has that narrowed it down? No!
OK.
I can tell you that he does deal with the paranormal on television.
The clue was that he would be very good at this game,
so what is this? What are we doing now?
Playing guessing games?
No...
I think you've got it wrong.
Who are you?
I'm Derek Acorah.
It's Derek Acorah, and isn't he looking well?
Look at that.
OK, now, Derek is going to play a little game with you
called I Sense.
All you need to do is guess what Derek is sensing in your bedroom,
because he senses, he can sense anything.
I sense the letter C.
He's here.
It's something in your bedroom. Oh, no...
It's in your bedroom, and you know what? The initial C, yeah,
he's here for the right reasons, but the C is important.
Is it something that's normally in the room?
No, it's not.
Oh. It's not generally...
Cat.
THEY LAUGH
Where's the cat?
Downstairs.
SHE LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY
OK, brilliant.
Any other guesses on C?
The ceiling. Ceiling?
The ceiling is not normally here, this is a new addition, is it? LAUGHTER
OK. Anything you can see in front of you that might not
normally be here?
Anything that you can see? Crew! Yes, I'll give you that.
Well done, it's crew. Say thank you to Derek, Derek Acorah, brilliant! Thank you! Brilliant.
Thank you. See you.
OK, it's time now to play a game of human ring toss.
This is a contortionist.
All I'm asking you to do, Jane, is if you can throw a hoop
on to the leg of this contortionist.
The foot is up, are we ready? Play. Go.
Keep going. Go on, Jane.
Oh, she's already done it! She's already... Keep going anyway.
How many can you get? How many... Oh, Jane is the man!
Jane, keep going. Oh! Go for the other foot. Go for the other foot.
Oh! Two more, quick.
All right, she's coming down now, that was amazing.
I can do something! That was extraordinary. Thank you very much.
Thank you. All right, now, for this next question, if you don't mind Jane,
I'm going to need to ask you to get out of bed, are you all right? That's fine, yeah, that's fine.
OK, so...
Now, the question I'm going to ask you is, who is singing
in your shower?
OK. OK? Yes, OK.
When I say, "Go to the bathroom," I mean, go in to the bathroom. Yeah. SHE LAUGHS
OK. Thank you.
All right. Here we go.
Jane, who is singing in your shower? OK.
# Oh-oh-oh
# But you'll never stop me from loving you
# It doesn't really matter what you put me through
# You'll never stop me from loving you. #
Who's that? Sonia?!
Yes!
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
Very good. I love that!
Very good, of course, it's Sonia, singing in your shower!
LAUGHTER Amazing!
Thank you very much, Sonia in the shower!
APPLAUSE
Come on, Jane, back to bed for more questions.
Sonia in the shower. OK.
That was absolutely exceptional.
OK. Please, can you now tell me who this is?
LAUGHTER
It's a Mr Man. Yes.
Mr Happy. Keep guessing. Mr Happy, no? Keep guessing.
Mr Dancey, Mr Wobbly, Mr... Keep guessing.
Mr Somebody! SHE LAUGHS
It is Mr Somebody.
OK, he's trying to do what he's famous for here.
Here he goes.
One of you must... There you go.
What's he doing? What's he doing? Kissing. Mr...
LAUGHTER
What's he doing, guys?!
What's he, what's he trying to... LAUGHTER
What's he trying to do?!
Mr Kissy! No, he's not Mr Kissy! LAUGHTER
What's he trying to do? Mr Tickle. Yes!
That's the correct answer.
OK. The other question was to name as many Mr Men characters,
but you've named them all already, in getting this one wrong.
Jane, thank you very much. Goodnight! LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
It's gone dark. They've all gone. Yeah.
Go back to sleep. LAUGHTER
LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
Very good. Ladies and gentlemen, Jane's Midnight Gameshow.
Very, very brilliant. Thank you so much.
That was so fun.
Jane, Jane... Yeah.
The problem with Mr Tickle is that he couldn't control his arms,
so it was very hard... Yes, it was. ..to get him to do what he was famous for. Yeah, yeah.
But when you have no control of your arms,
you know, arms are kind of key to tickling... Yeah, they are, yes.
..so really it was quite hard to get that going. Very hard, yes.
We do have some prizes for you.
I've got you, of course, this is a signed copy
of Sonia's album. There you go.
Don't ever forget that, and of course we have Mr Tickle
who's going to, who also has no control... APPLAUSE
Thank you so much. Mr Tickle, and you cannot go away
without receiving this -
our iconic and very-much-upgraded
"do not disturb" sign, for being part of the Midnight Gameshow. Aw!
Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much to Jane and Colin on 10:12:29.560,00:00:00.000 the Midnight Gameshow.