even though he has a whole lot of money even though he's iron man
dude here's the deal he's still nice my daughter is four years old and she says daddy
don't you know iron man can't you hook it up it's my birthday can he come to my birthday
can you make it happen daddy and uh this is at his height this is when it's everything is going
and i text him and i said listen man uh my daughter you know she loves iron man
if you've got time you know what i'm saying you know if you stop by and this is the day before
her birth it's saturday sunday is is the birthday he texts back he says it's 12 o'clock noon good
do you still get urges to do drugs i have not even an inkling of a desire it's not that difficult to
overcome these seemingly ghastly problems what's hard is to decide rather than living in fear of
something that is within the realm of control provided i don't imagine i'm running the show
and that i don't get into a position where i start becoming narcissistic and i'm not
vigilant anymore and i don't do the things that by vigilant it means what every day you've got to
well uh sometimes you know sometimes every day is a problem too because here's what i tend to
do i'm either you know as what you saw that that beginning clip and thank you very glamorous i
appreciate that or i also can tend to become so regimented and uptight that people like uh hey
grandma should we just put a shawl around you why are you say because then i'm thinking i've got to
i've got to get this right and either extreme is disastrous you know so i try to just give myself
a break well i i actually had really good parents and um they were kind of square in a lot of ways
and they were very highly ideal people and um and and artists and and did their very best but
i think was a cultural thing at that time but you you started smoking crack cocaine 1995 1995 yeah
and something called black tar heroin what is that it's it's something that feels really good
and should be avoided at all costs really yes it's like a stronger form of heroin than regular hair
i don't know about uh the stronger forms i just know that that's what i came across in a situation
where it's like hey here's kind of what we're doing and i'm looking there's you know my friends
my peers people who don't seem insane and they're like yeah we're just doing a little this and i was
like great boy that feels really good i would like to do that every 20 minutes for the next you know
and that's how it happened it was literally the first time really i had never looked the first
time i think so i had no intention of of uh of of making my my public my private life and my career
so very difficult and yet i believe you know as i sit here today that i i hope is for some higher
purpose and i would say this to anybody is that you know it's really um it's easy to to um embrace
hopelessness when things seem insurmountable and yet uh it is i it's actually just a matter
of time until all the elements come together for things to be all right i mean i believe that you
know most uh difficult situations will resolve themselves if you are persistent and if you don't
if you don't i give up entirely and that's what i never did i never gave up
that thing that you're wearing around your neck yes being as you are obviously known as
being iron man are you concerned with wearing a large thing in the exact same spot life is
funny because i was doing this before i ever got fitted for the rt so it was more of art
imitating oddball stuff i was doing anyway even more interesting because maybe you were born to
be iron man because iron man obviously had that loosely pre-arranged destiny and what's incredible
is how far afield you can go from it and still find your way back yeah i'd say it's 70
maintenance of what can i do to do my part to stay out of the way and then the other part i
always think of it as like this little super thin invisible thread but you can feel the tug and you
just kind of you have to be really gentle you have to pause when agitated and you have to go for it
when you're going like there's four walls in here which one has the map behind it you it's that one
and you knock down the wall and it's there you know yeah what is that though that's a
synchronicity yeah uh intuition i don't know right that's the big i don't know and i really
feel it's so funny at this point in my life and being you know kind of middle-aged and all that
well i know i'm gonna fly around the world i'm gonna sell some soap and i know i have a
new project and i know i've just retired my jersey on this 12-year journey i've been on
and uh and how do i want to start and it came up how would you like to go yes that's exactly
what i'm gonna do i'm gonna go have the joe rogan experience and kick off this year and this season
and this new chapter by doing what i love i think part of the reason i'm still so interested not
just in life but also you know getting to do what i do is i'm a fan i love movies i love creativity
i love music i love i love culture and the fact that i actually have a place in it while i'm
observing it and digging it is like it's it's it's an honor it's just
i keep thinking see clearly and it's difficult because i i feel like we all just get buffeted by
feelings and ego or fears or little you know chips of resentments or intuitions that are tied to
something maybe higher but you think is out of your reach or whatever so i need to be kept uh
right-sized because i can easily fall into self-seeking and depression and self-pity
and judgment and all that stuff it's kind of a it's a bit of a default but i spend enough
energy and i've had enough uh help over enough years to actually just say oh that's that's just
awful destructive behavior you're entertaining in your head you know if i'm noticing anything
now it's that we need to shift and we need new challenges and just like society and politics
things are moving and morphing and the information age is making things so everything's learning and
growing from everything so quickly and improving or disproving but for me it's just incredible
our culture never encourages taking a break never encourages saying don't chase that thing
because you've got it in your hands so confidence you know there's been times
when i've felt i'm in possession of it and then you want to let go a little bit because it's
only ever the moment and life guiding you the wind is so at your back that you're like wow
are you just are you just you know jumping over the waves and all that by yourself and you're
like you bet i am but there's a physics to the moment and the wind's at your back
and then the wind does what the [ __ ] wind does and it changes and if you're left there thinking
what you know so i think it's great to be in full possession of what you would call
supreme confidence and then see what happens if you don't hold on to it so hard because
it's great but it is a bit of an illusion because like everything else it's always changing
always know what your action is because then when you come in in the morning confident or
when you come in the morning you can't hit your ass with both hands you know what to do
just boil down what it is you're doing whether there's a camera around or just
what am i doing today today i'm i'm showing up and i'm trying to be honest and and also to
listen and learn but really my action today is i'm beginning a process of promotion it's
kind of all the same thing if you are leaning on something any anything that you attempt to control
is something that you probably have a problem with you know and
so when someone says you know i really wonder if maybe i should go to rehab well uh you're a
wreck you just lost your job and your wife left you uh you might want to give it a shot yeah
you want to chase it but what i appreciate is you know where you're at by what you're able to
retain if you fight for it and the things that are going no matter what you do sometimes it's about
i don't need to try to use something to hold on to everything i want to pick the five or seven
things that i definitely want to hold on to and i want to watch the rest of it go in and out with
the tides smile though your heart is aching smile even though it's breaking when there aren't clouds
you get by
you