Nobody is buying V8 cars anymore, okay?
And I find that very sad.
I don't want V8s to disappear into the pages of history.
So, how's this for an idea?
If you're not gonna use V8s to power cars,
how about using them to power something else?
Like, for instance, a food blender?
This is what I've got here in essence.
This is the 6.2 liter engine that you would normally put in a Corvette.
I see no reason why you couldn't put it in a kitchen.
So, here it is.
There's the drive shaft going under the petrol tank into the kitchen cabinet.
Obviously, you'll have to take out the wedding presents,
the fondue sets that you don't want.
Because, in here, you've got the diff,
which then sends the drive shaft up here and into the blender.
Very good. So what... What can you blend with it?
I could blend you if I wanted to.
But what I'm actually going to do under this high visibility shield here
is blend some beef.
-Beef? -Beef.
Yes, beef.
This is going to be a man's V8 smoothie that I'm gonna make now.
So I'm gonna plonk that in there like that.
Does that still have bones in it?
Yes. And then...
I'm going to put some chilies in.
Got a few chilies.
This is Bovril. Because that's a V8 man's drink.
That's a collection of manly ingredients.
-Yeah, haven't finished yet. Tabasco. -Nice touch.
That wasn't... Just a dash...
...of that in there.
And I think, for added bite, a brick.
It is actually a brick.
Oh, it's broken, but there we are. Pop that in there.
Okay, now, we pop the lid on.
Perhaps, you could give me a hand with this, Hammond,
-because it's quite complicated. -Yes, I'm the practical man.
No, that...
-Those go on here like that. -Yeah, so then we do it up.
Is this going to work or is the top gonna come off
and we'll have a really hard time explaining to the ambulance people
how he's got beef bone antlers stuck in his head?
Just worried. Relax.
Yeah, relax when you've got the keys to a V8 blender.
-Of course. -Yes.
-Yeah. -Right.
This is the controls.
Oh, God.
-Tell me that's not an accelerator pedal. -Yes.
Oh, just safety precautions.
Is it loud?
Is it loud, James?
Of course, it's loud. Are we ready?
-Here we go! -This is in the kitchen at home, yeah?
It does make a bit of a racket.
Some of it came out.
Yeah, some of it did.
Actually, on the noise, we're used to, like, vacuum cleaners and things at home,
so I think you'd grow accustomed to that after a while.
See, the thing is, is that what I'd like to do is,
whenever my wife puts the Archers on, which she does roundabout 7 p.m.
is I'd fire up my food blender.
-Nice. -Yeah.
Can you get the thing off? I'll prepare the glasses.
So this is... It's like a manly smoothie cocktail?
Exactly.
-Oh, this is the moment. -Yes! Yes!
-Wow! -Look at that!
That just is the business!
Fantastic and delicious. Right, are we ready?
What a creation.
-Here we go. -Get some of the bits.
It needs a name.
We should give it a name. We should call it "Desperate Shag In A Skip."
Try some of that.
A Quick One Round The Back Of The Dustcart.
I think he likes it.
-I've got the name for it. -What?
The Bloody Awful.
-Have you tried it? -Yeah.
-You haven't. Have you? -Yes.
Show me. Put it in your mouth. Because that will put...
That will put testes on your chest, that will.
It's put hairs on my eyeballs.
I'm not sure this works.
Look.
I'm not giving up with this V8 idea, okay? Next week, old people.
-You can't blend old people. -No.
You know the Stannah stairlift? Very slow.
How about a V8 Stannah stairlift?
The old lady, she'll be on the bog in half a second.
-Yeah, that's it. -That's fantastic.
So I'll get to... I'll get working on that.