9-1-1 whats your emergency
Hello 9-1-1 it seems I have misplaced my bottle cap its- it was right here
It was right here a second ago, and now I don't have it anymore
Your bottle cap? I'm sorry ma'am but this is meant for emergency's only
Never mind I found it
Hey guys today we are doing, dumbest
9-1-1 calls ever we did the creepiest and now we are doing the dumbest
like there are people that will call 9-1-1
For any little predicament, they have let's get started
9-1-1, do you need fire, medical, or police?
No ma'am, I don't. I don't have an emergency.
Two police officers just left my house just now...
Could I get their names, please?
Sorry, I know it's not an emergency, but...
Heck...
It's not very often a good looking man comes up to your doorstep.
Could you send him back my way? (Laughing)
Do you need them to come back there?
Oh, I'd like that, yeah.
Why do you need them to come back there? (more laughing)
Um.. Because I have an emergency
Oh. So it was an emergency.
Hello, you got an emergency no, it's not an emergency, but a really really
Smokin' hot cop just came in my house, and I'd like him to come back
(Laughing)
Understandable
I'll think of something...
He's cute - Let me think of a damn emergency.
Would you send them back? I think they're partners. Send them back my way would you?- HE'S CUTE.
Okay, and what is the reason?
Um.. My dog. Just blame it on my dog
Hold on a moment.
Thank you.
Yay
(Confused laughing)
He's a cutie-pie- Yay!
He's a cutie-pie!
Okay and ma'am, what do you need the officer to do?
I'm just gonna be honest with you, okay? I just thought it was cute. I'm 45 years old, and I'd like to meet him again
But I don't know how to go about doing that without calling
(Laughter)
At least she's honest.
Did this poor woman get arrested for this? I mean come on.
I'm 45 years old. I'd like to see him again
It's not every day cute guy comes to my house. I'd like to meet him again this time
I'll try to think of something to say. "Oh, I'm so glad you're here. We have an emergency. It's upstairs in my bedroom"
It's in between these legs so come check it out. Yeah. There's a lot of emergencies down there. I
I see you.
But I don't know how to go about doing that without calling 9-1-1.
I know this is not, absolutely, in any WAY, SHAPE, or FORM an emergency
But if you would give the officer with my phone number and ask him to come back.
Erm, would you mind?
I'll give them the message to call you.
Thank you very much.
OOO
SHE THE REAL MVP!
The 9-1-1 operator- the real MVP!
She's like- "Hell yea, I'll give him your number, I got chu girl!"
I she actually did give them the number.
I wanna see this girl- Barbra- get it.
BROO-
That's so messed up!
They actually arrested her!
The cop came back to her house and arrested her for misusing the 9-1-1 number
Man, she just wanted some DI-
I mean what she should have done was call the non-emergency line and be like, "hey yo, can you hook me up?"
Hello operator gonna do her like that? That-that- no. I feel bad for her.
Poor Barbara.
Now she gonna go to jail and she didn't get the di-
I wouldn't have arrested her.
I would have just had a talk.
So this next guy, I don't know what's wrong with him
He's drunk and high at the same time to be champagne on airplane, and he called 9-1-1
NINETY times in NINE minutes
Trying to order some food
9-1-1 your emergency?
...
Do you have an emergency sir?
Because you dialed 9-1-1
I dialed 9-1-1
Yeah you dialed 9-1-1.
(Unintelligible)
I don't- I am not understanding a word you're saying sir.
Can I getta UHHHH
(Unintelligible)
What did you need?
Okay, so what why did you call 9-1-1 for then, what do you need?
BONELESS PIZZA
And a uhhhhhhhhh
Two liter coke
Do you have an emergency?- Cheeseburger (Quiet laughing)
A cheeseburger
Have a good day.
(Laughter)
9-1-1, your emergency?
Yeah, I just spoke to you and you just hung up on me
Well I asked if you had emergency, you said "no, you needed a cheeseburger."
So we don't take cheeseburger orders.
(Laughing)
"WE DON'T TAKE CHEESEBURGER ORDERS HERE SIR."
This is only if someone ate your cheeseburger, someone stole your cheeseburger, if someone shoved the cheeseburger up your a-
Then you call 9-1-1
Thank you sir.
(Spacebar clicking)
If you give me some information maybe we can try to "help you out."
A little after the call police realized that Jackson was already known to the authorities for a number of
Misdemeanors including not turning up for a court appearance, and many alcohol-related incidents
He was then arrested on an outstanding warrant, and never got the cheeseburger
So what they did too this dude right here,
They looked him up. They traced him they went to his house
They're like- "Hey this dude has warrants out for him", so they arrested him, and he never got his cheeseburger.
I feel you man.
I have a question...
Is this an emergency sir?
Depends
well not really...
Well...
If it's not an emergency you don't call 9-1-1, sir.
I- I have a legal question.
Well, it's not- Is this an emergency?
I don't know what that means...
Is it life threatening?
-Or an active crime in progress?
Crime in progress possibly...
What's going on?
I was just growing some Marijuana...
I was just wondering what the...
How much, you know, trouble you can get into for one plant?
(INHALE)
OH MY GOD
You're growing marijuana, and you wanna know how much...
Depends how BIG the plant is...
It's only a seedling.
(Laughing at the stupidity)
Well it's possesion.
Okay.
You can get pinched for a roach in a car.
Okay.
Understandable have a nice day.
All right. Thanks for the info.
Did they ACTUALLY trace this dude?
Nooo
This poor dude- "I have a marijuana plant. You know. I just planted it and then I realized,
Hmm, maybe I should call the cops. Uhh.. I have a plant
Can I get in trouble for it?"
(Phone thudding on desk)
WHOO
I list you the honest man. He's just trying to be honest
They actually trace them, and he went to jail.
"Who needs cops, right?"
This guy just gonna give himself up on the phone.
I just wanted to make sure it was legal
Okay, so this old lady went to go buy some beers.
Do old people drink?
Like, like- really old?
So what's the problem?
The problem is, I can't open the bottle.
Could you send a man over, and I'll be downstairs (So much confusion
An have him open the bottle?
Okay wait a minute- Okay wait a minute?
Am I correct that you can't sleep so you went out and bought
Two- bottles of beer
And you want a police man to come by and open them for you?
(Realization Laughter)
Yes please, because I don't have any equipment here that seems to handle that kind of a prop.
(Space bar clicking)
She wants, a damn cop to come to her house, and open her beer bottles.
So she can drink them and knock out.
(Failing to contain laughter)
(Laughs)
Understandable.
((Space bar clicking intensifies))
And I, have never gone in...
I think I had a ketchup bottle once, and a neighbor broke the top off.
Aww.
Awww- Well listen, I'm gonna get you someone out there to open those beer bottles.
You just stay in your apartment ma'am and I'll send them up to the apartment.
That's okay. I'll just get it-
I'm a cold sober, and-
I know you are.
Yeah, and I don't have any (Inhale) any bad intent or anything
I just want to be able to go to sleep.
I know, well we'll get out there too open your beer bottle
Wow the real MVP
Yeah, I'll send the cops out there -and then they arrest your ass. I don't think they'll arrest the old lady-
unless you in Phoenix
They will. Without a doubt man, but I mean the real MVP, and then what we pay taxes for man
Go help that old lady.
Stead of pulling me over for going 10 over the limit.
Hello. I need the police please!
Okay, what's happening?
Well what happened was, there's been a theft outside my house!
Okay when did it occur?
Well, I'm not sure exactly because I haven't been out to check on him for about 5 hours-
I went out about 5 minutes ago to have a Fag (Cigarette)-
and He's gone!
So it could be in the last 5 hours, but I know there's a CCTV up this road
Who's gone, sorry?
...
My snowman..
WHAT?
(Snort?)
My snowman is gone!
SOMEBODY- WENT AND STOLE MY SNOWMAN.
IN THE LAST 5 HOURS,
SOMEBODY WENT AND STOLE MY SNOWMAN.
This is a grown-ass woman calling about her snowman.
Right, your snowman's been stolen?
Yeah.
Right, okay in the last 5 hours?
Well, 4-5 hours I can't be sure exactly...
And what do you mean? A snowman actually made out of snow, or an ornament?
No it's made out of snow, I made him myself.
Right, okay.
It had 2 of my teaspoons as his arms.
And money as his face.
(Seriously concerned expression)
I'm not being funny, I know it's only a snowman.
WAIT, she had money- as his face.
Who puts money-
-as a face of a snowman?
Of course the mother f___ers gonna get stolen!
IF
You put 20s as his hair or his eyes or whatever?
What kind of neighborhood is this?
"We put money on our snowmen."
I'm not being funny, I know it's only a snowman-
But I thought it would be fine, what with it being icy and all that..
People ain't been walking up and down the road.
It ain't a nice road, but at the end of the day-
You don't expect someone to nick your snowman, you know what I mean?
So later a cop actually came to our house to investigate and then told her. "you can't be calling 9-1-1
Because your snowman is missing." You know probably melted in four to five hours.
It's like she went to work, she came home,
My snowman's gone
She's like- "Check the CCTVs check the cameras. I want to know who did it."
Who just? Who's still the Snowman anyway?
Who steals a snowman anyway?
Has anybody ever stole a snowman before?
(Very deep thought)
(Thinking intensifies)
(Its not clicking)
But anyways that's all for today
I hope you guys enjoyed this video if you want a part TWO make sure you hit that like button in the FACE
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Love you guys so much. Thanks for watching bye guys!