- Heya, playa.
Do you wanna know how to ask a girl out
when she's surrounded by strangers?
When other people are watching,
it could be incredibly difficult for you to approach her.
But don't worry, in this video,
I'm gonna share some practical tips
that you could start using
to make that whole process a whole lot easier.
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- For those of you that are new here, my name is Josh,
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I think before you jump into how to ask that girl out,
you need to understand why people might be watching.
Sometimes you might be thinking,
why is everyone's eyes on me when I approach a girl?
It makes it so much harder for me to actually talk to her
'cause I'm afraid everyone's judging me.
The truth of the matter is that people are just curious.
When they see someone do something unconventional,
such as approach a stranger,
they don't really know what's gonna happen.
Things can go incredibly good or they can go incredibly bad.
And yes, I'm sure to some degree,
there are a few people that do wanna see you fail
but for the most part,
people are excited to see how it plays out.
So, if you walk in and you try to talk to that girl
and you fail, they're gonna be excited to see that.
But if you walk in and you succeed,
they're gonna be even more excited to see that.
When we see a person encounter an obstacle and succeed,
our body releases a ton of oxytocin
and it makes us feel good about ourself.
So, at the end of the day,
even though people may not realize it,
they kinda are rooting for you.
But regardless, their opinions don't really matter.
What you actually want
is for you to actually feel comfortable
approaching that girl without everyone's eyes
kind of throwing you off and making you mess up.
And that's why it's incredibly important
for you to be mindful
of the environment you're in and what's going on.
For example, just because you see a girl
that you wanna approach
doesn't mean it's always the best circumstance to do it.
I know, you wanna know
how to ask out any girl any time anywhere
and I'm sure there's a lot of dating coaches
and people on YouTube
that will tell you it's entirely possible
and you should always go for it.
But I think it's far more important for you
to learn to be mindful here,
to be aware what the other person is going through
and to not interrupt them
just because you want that ego boost,
you wanna fulfill that need to do something
just because you want it
and it doesn't really matter what they want.
Now, does that mean certain situations
are completely off limits?
I wouldn't really say so.
That's why I said it's so important to be mindful
of your specific situation.
For example, does that girl look uncomfortable
when she's surrounded by strangers?
Is she by herself?
Is she focused on doing something
that she needs concentration?
Just because a person is there alone
doesn't really mean they wanna be bothered
or have someone approach them in that moment.
And it's important for you
to try to figure out that situation before you do it.
Now, just like I said in the video
about how to approach a girl in front of her friends,
if that girl was surrounded by strangers in a public area,
what you're gonna wanna do
is to create a playful and fun environment
so that she can feel comfortable opening up to you.
For example, let's say you're waiting in line for something
and there's a girl on that line you wanna talk to.
Well, the idea of just talking to her
while other people are standing around
might make things a bit awkward.
So, what you might wanna start with
is asking a group question,
getting everyone involved in the conversation
so no one stands there awkwardly
just watching you talk to this girl.
Starting any new group conversation with a question
is always a good idea.
It gives everyone the opportunity
to share their specific answer.
So, when the girl
that you actually wanna talk to gives her answer,
you can then play back and forth in talking to her.
And as you do that more and more
throughout the conversation,
the people around you will start to realize
that the two of you have something going on,
a connection that's deeper than the rest of them
and they'll be okay with backing away.
But they've already been introduced,
they've already been made to feel comfortable,
and they can allow things to just be.
Now, one more thing you can't really overlook here
is the fact that sometimes being approached by a stranger
in public when you're surrounded by strangers
can make you feel intimidated and awkward.
So, just because you wanna approach that girl
and you've worked up the courage to talk to her
doesn't mean she has the courage to respond to you
when everyone else is watching.
All in all, when it comes to the asking her out piece
of that conversation,
you wanna make sure that when you do ask her out
is to do something small.
Not a big, grand gesture,
not something that she has to commit time and effort to,
but something where she can just take a piece of her day,
either in that moment or later on
just to get to know you better.
Remember, everything is small steps.
So, you don't wanna overshoot your boundaries
and ask her to require a lot of her time to spend with you.
You wanna ask her for just a small piece
so you can build up to the next step.
And it's that small ask that will make her feel
a whole lot more comfortable saying yes,
especially if she's surrounded by strangers
that she thinks will judge her.
Now, if you found this advice to be helpful,
hit the Thumbs Up button
and make sure to click on the video over there on the side.
The learning doesn't end here, guys.
In that video, I break down how to ask a girl out
and talk to her when she's surrounded by her friends,
which could be the fiercest competition
you're gonna have to experience.
So, check out that video and I'll catch you guys next time.
As always, love and peace.