WANDA: Every time you go out there, you come back a little bit more dead inside.
[SCREAMING]
Oh, come on, you scream like a girl. Do it like this:
[SCREAMING]
Someone's a IittIe angry because they died and went to--
[SINGING] Hello, my mutant Hello, my carcass
Hello, my bug-infested corpse
Did, like, Satan send you guys?
How come God hogs up all the good followers and we get all the retards?
-Hey, what's up with that face? -Get your hands off me.
[GRUNTING]
Argh!
MAN: Help.
[GRUNTING]
What is that?
[GRUNTING]
What is that thing?
Shocked and amazed at the wonders of necroflesh?
You're not alone. For a limited time only...
...you, too, can have this handsome epidermis...
...for the eensy price of your soul and a buttload of pain.
MAN 1 : Let's get out of here! MAN 2: Go, go, go!
MAN 3: Oh, my God!
I hate weekend Satanists, don't you?
Look at you. Look at you.
From spawn larva to full-fledged Hellspawn in record time.
-Ha-ha-ha. -What is this?
You were tied to the tracks...
...and that stupid train just kept running over you, now, didn't it?
Running over you.
In the name of the people and things of hell...
...I dub thee Spawn, general of hell's army.
Arise, Your Crispness!
Arise, Duke of Deep-Fried!
Sultan of Sizzling!
Emir of Ooey-Gooey!
All right, so I suck as a cIown. Bite me.
Now, look.
You do your job and I'll be the first to kiss your black butt.
But if you can't hack it...
...I'Il gladly FedEx your worthless carcass back to the frying pan...
...where Malebolgia will be waiting for both us.
Shh. You'll wake up the dead. Oops, that's you.
You know, dead people can still die, schmecky.
All I gotta do is cut off your head. Ha-ha-ha.
SPAWN: Oh, God.
Ah! Ah! Did you have to use the G-word? La, la, Ia.
Wanda.
What have I done?
[THUNDER CRASHING]
You done with this HalImark moment?
I can't take any more of this sentimental crap. Come on.
I'll come back when your armor hardens.
And don't play with it or you'll go blind.
I have a few more details to attend to and then we can play. Heh-heh-heh.
Yuck.
I hate anchovies.
Mmm. Mmm.
That tastes so good, I could kick some puppies.
[BOTTLES CLATTERING]
Good.
[SCREAMING]
This freak stuff is gonna come in handy when I get my hands on Wynn.
You're letting them get to you.
Easy, friend.
Every choice has its consequences.
Who are you?
An assassin, like you.
Only I killed for the kingdom of Saxony 500 years ago.
I am Cogliostro.
That's all you need to know. For now.
Are there any normal people left on earth?
Or is everyone just back from heIl?