Hey everybody!
Today I want to talk to you about bridge statements and how they can help with our self-worth and confidence
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We hear it all the time. You just have to believe in yourself or say some positive affirmations every day
It'll make you feel so much better
Or one that I mentioned pretty frequently is you should talk more nicely to yourself,
because it can improve your mental health
While all of these things are true and they can in fact help us feel better about ourselves
It can be hard to go from "you're so stupid and lazy" to "you're amazing and so good at everything"
Cuz suddenly saying some positive things just isn't going to work
Sure, we can say it but we aren't going to believe it. So we aren't going to keep doing it
It can feel like a waste of time and frankly stupid
Since we know talking more kindly to ourselves is key to fighting anxiety, stress
depression, body dysmorphia, and many other mental health issues
How can we change the way we talk to ourselves without feeling like a total fraud?
And this is where bridge statements come in
they bridge the gap between the negative and sometimes downright nasty thoughts
and the positive ones
and here's how they work
Instead of feeling the need to say something wonderful and positive like
"I love everything about my body and I'm beautiful and amazing"
We could start with a bridge statement like "It is possible that I'm not as ugly and fat as I think I am"
It's possible.
Bridge statements live in the possible, the coulds and the maybes.
We don't have to think we are wonderful and amazing
but we do have to start opening ourselves up to the idea
That our negative thoughts
could be wrong!
Because here's the thing
Thoughts are just that, thoughts.
Thoughts are not facts
They are not based in research
and they are most certainly not unbiased
and just because we have a thought over and over
Doesn't make it true
But because we tell ourselves these nasty things so frequently
Often spending most of our day thinking them. It could be hard to fight back against them
It's almost like these thoughts have formed a deep rut over time making it
really really easy for them just to slide right into our brain
And the new positive thoughts are gonna have to take this really rough unpaved road in
and that's why it could be so hard to think them
let alone, believe them.
and even knowing all of this can still make doing it difficult
so let's come up with a few bridge statements to fight back against what I think some of the most common negative thoughts are.
And so number one, if our negative thought is "I am so ugly and no one likes me"
Let's try
it's possible that I may not be as ugly or as unlovable as I think
It's possible.
And number two, I always do embarrassing things
Here from a lot of you. This is how your anxious thoughts get going. So perhaps our bridge statement is
Maybe not everything I do is embarrassing, not a hundred percent of it
I could maybe do something somewhat normal
sometimes
Maybe, right ?
And the third bridge statement I want to try is
let's say the nasty thought is "I am so fat and stupid"
We've all thought that, at one time or another. The bridge statement could be
I'm open to the possibility that I could maybe not be quite as fat or ugly as I think
These are sometimes easier to come up with. Do you guys agree?
And the fourth one I want to try out, just the last one,
is "I don't deserve to be loved or happy"
That can be a hard one to overcome. Right?
So the bridge statement could be, it could be
that I could, at some point, in the future
Be lovable and happy.
Maybe some time. We don't have to put a definitive time on it
We don't have to believe it wholeheartedly that it's happening now,
but in the future this could happen.
And now I want you to really give it a try
if you have those same thoughts, I want you to come up with different
bridge statements and the ones that I came up with
and keep track of the three to five most common nasty thoughts that you have
And, instead of spending all your time trying to argue back with a radically positive thought
Let's try some of these bridge thoughts
Maybe once you have a couple of bridge thoughts to start with we can work closer and closer to the positive thought.
For example, if our original thought is "I'm so fat and stupid"
and the first bridge statement was "I'm open to the possibility
that I may be not quite as fat or stupid as I think"
then we can build on that and say "I'm not quite as fat or stupid as I used to think"
and then into maybe "I even look okay to some people
and some people think I might be smart and I actually don't mind my body, as much as I used to."
You can see where I'm going with this how one bridge statement can build on to another and then keep building that bridge
all the way from that negative thought
To that radically positive one
and maybe that's a thought that we never even believed we could think
Give it a try. Let me know what you think. Do you like bridge statements? Have you used these before?
I think, this is something that could really benefit us all, and I over all just hope that was helpful
I know changing the way we think is really really hard and it takes a lot of practice
But just trust me
if we make an effort each morning, or night, or both, if we're feeling really inspired
We will start to feel better
So give it a shot and I will see you next time.
Bye