Today's been a great day so far every time I'm around her
We have great energy great chemistry, but you know, it's awesome as this day's been you know
I still have to have a tough conversation with her later tonight
My virginity it's a conversation that I haven't had very often and it's something that I haven't been very public about
So I'm a little anxious a little nervous to see how she reacts to it because it could possibly be a deal-breaker so it's scary
But you know, I'm just gonna have to speak from the heart and hope that you know
she
respects it
It's a mess nice. Yes, this place is insane
This is awesome. So if our Colton has shown me so many great sides to him and I do see the confidence
I see how poised he is at this point. I'm pretty sure Colton is getting that rose
He would have to drop a crazy bomb on me to have me not give it to him at this point
To a great day. I know that this is gonna be an important week and for me this day
Was something that I'll cherish forever. So thank you to an awesome day cheers to that
Mmm, I
Really had such a good day though again
Oh I'm just I'm happy that we had today cuz I feel so good with where we're at
And I of course have questions, but I want to not only feel confident in you
But I want you to feel confident in me, too. And
Bringing me home to your family. There's a conversation that I do want to have with you
Because it could be a potential roadblock for us
Um
It's one of those things that is hard for me to talk about because I haven't talked about it very often
And it's something that I struggle with
articulating I
Told you earlier I put my professional life in front of my personal life. Yeah, and I spent a lot of time working on
football Colton and I sort of forgot who
Personal coolin was and I did only have one serious relationship coming into this and I haven't had that many
girlfriends heard that many dates because of sports
And because of that I still him I am a virgin really
yeah, I
It was tough, you know, I'm not even sure to be honest with you like my dad knows
Because it is something that I haven't, you know, shared openly tea and a lot of people there's only a handful of people that know
it is something now that I'm proud of and it is something now that I think that
Everybody who I see a future with should know. Mm-hm. So it is something that it wants you to know
Thank you for telling me
Now I yeah
I just I get that that's not difficult and I would never want to pressure you were like put you in
so much out of your comfort zone in this situation where it would
Worry you
Can you excuse me for one second
Those are hit scary
I don't know what she's thinking right now. Like that's like the frightening part of all this that's where my
Nervousness and anxiety comes in right now
Cuz I don't show that I do a lot of people
My greatest fear in all this is being Who I am and put it all out there and not being enough for her I
Don't know if the virginity thing will be like a big deal to back up but it's gotta be something they talk about it's gotta
Be something that you bring up to her. It's not fair to her if you don't bring that up in the situation
She's in we're basically in four weeks to probably be engaged or one of us
Physical chemistry suit sex is huge
And I don't think you can
Put a ring on a finger without knowing if there's any kind of physical chemistry any kind of physical compatibility
There's just so many questions and there's so many skeletons in the closet
My prediction is that she doesn't give him a rose. I think it's just based on the virginity Oh
today, I feel like if Colton lays everything out there on the line you could go just
totally wrong
I definitely wouldn't put a ring on the finger unless I knew what I was getting into sex is a big part of life
So be very difficult to get past that
Thanks, yeah
How you doing yeah, yeah
You know that wasn't easy to open them. Oh
Sorry, yeah, I'm scared
That's not something that I talk about very often. I
Can see it on your face how tough it is
Yeah
Especially it's tough when you're in a relationship with somebody
What was it because you told me that you loved your last girlfriend yeah, what was it?
That was she all the same pages you in that regard. Yeah, I mean it was just
It was hard that that relationship was one was challenging it was hard
It can be you know
it can obviously be a roadblock in a relationship and I don't want you to think that it's not like
For me, it's it's one of those things like when the time comes
It'll it'll happen. I understand
yeah, I
Just I'm not trying to like prove anything or like it's just a part of me, you know
In the past, I was scared. I
was ashamed
Because growing up in a locker room environment isn't the easiest for a guy like I can imagine
There was a lot of open
dialogue in the athletic community and to be different in a locker room is
Something I never wanted to be so for me I hid it I made up a lot of Lies
Just to fit in
And it really threw me for a loop. Yeah, cuz it was like Who am I? Why the hell did I make up lies?
Why wasn't I proud of who I was why didn't I stand up for the man I am
And that's why now
It's like important for me to share that with you because I want you to know to like I'm not waiting for marriage
I'm waiting for the right heart. Mm-hmm. Yeah. No, I look I'm like, I'm 26
I'm not gonna have a mistake one night. I
Want it to be a special moment. I want that to be a gift to give to somebody
So I totally get it and their respect you for that so much. Yeah, I would never judge you
Or think any less of you for that?
Boulton telling me that he is still a virgin it was unexpected because he hasn't experienced a
Ton of life like most people at this
part in their lives have
But it means so much that he was able to open up about something I think is so difficult for him
I loved when he said it's not a marriage thing for me. It's a heart thing. I
Appreciate somebody who takes that so seriously. Oh
Well Colton you
You've given me a lot to think about today. I
Know that you opening up about something
So raw and vulnerable is hard
I've been asking for honesty this entire time and I know that hometowns are next week. I
Want to meet the people who made
Colton Underwood
so
Colton
We accept this rose without a doubt
I
Feel excited and relieved. I was really scared that it wasn't gonna go right perfect ending to a perfect day
Amen amen getting the rose means that she accepts me for who I am
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