- When I was 14, I was spanked.
- Let's talk about that.
- Hi, I'm Lucas from Mexico.
Good Mythical Morning.
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Okay, listen, ran across this article
out of Stockholm, Sweden,
and it reminded me of a story from our past.
- Oh.
- In Stockholm, a man was convicted of smuggling,
but then he outwitted his jailers.
- Smuggling what?
- It doesn't even say.
- Doesn't matter.
- He outwitted his jailers
by sneaking in a friend
to serve most of his year long prison sentence.
He snuck a friend into prison instead of him.
How ironic is that, he smuggled-
- He's a smuggler, yeah.
- He smuggled a friend in to serve
what ended up, I think, nine months of a 12 month sentence.
- The friend was in a suitcase,
he was like, oh, that's my personal items.
- No, I think what he did was,
he just took his license,
but he put the other guy's picture on it.
- Oh, that's smart.
- The smuggler's picture on it,
that's all it takes in Sweden, I guess.
I mean, we got some people watching in Sweden,
let us know how easy it is.
- Well, prison in Sweden
is like going to a hotel of some kind.
- Oh really, you've been there?
- Yeah, it was like a Holiday Inn Express experience.
- My real question is...
They found out after the guy's sentence was up,
you know, the released the guy
and I guess on his way out, he was like,
oh, by the way, I'm not him, I'm his friend.
(Rhett chuckles)
You know, he just couldn't help himself.
But my question is, so now they're searching for the guy
to put him in prison,
and I'm wondering if the friend who already served his term
is then going to be punished
and is going to have to serve more, because that would suck.
- Oh, I hope not.
- I think he should be convicted of something
like volunteer imprisonment,
which that shouldn't be legal.
- Yeah.
There's no laws against that.
- But then he can say, but you've already served your term.
It's like you served it ahead of time.
But it got me thinking,
if I was convicted of something,
would you take my place?
Would you be willing to do that, friend that you are?
- No, not a chance.
- You didn't even have to think about it.
- Of course not, no, I'm not going on the inside,
this is America, prison is crazy.
- But it would be prison in Sweden,
because that's where I'm gonna do all my wrong things.
- Oh, definitely.
In fact, let's do it now.
Let's go to Sweden and commit crimes left and right
and let's both go to prison.
It would be a respite.
- A respite?
- It'd be like a year long resort experience.
- Only one of us need to go, that's the whole point
is that one of us would be out,
and one of us would be in.
And the one who's in,
is the one who shouldn't be in.
- We'll tag team it every week,
I'll come on the weekends, you're in.
- Clock in, clock out?
- Yeah.
- But like I said, it reminded me of an experience
from our childhood, or actually many,
that in some ways is the opposite of this.
We would do something and we'd both get in trouble,
but then you would go home and receive a punishment
from your parents,
and then I would then...
My mom would glom on your punishment to me sometimes.
- She looked to my parents
to see the level of discipline,
and then she administered that to you.
- Oh, he got one year in Sweden,
then you get one year in Sweden.
But if she didn't hear, then I didn't get anything.
- Right.
- That's just how it worked.
Let's take a specific example,
let's tell them about the rooftop story
and what happened there.
- Okay, this is when we were 14,
about the same time that we were working
on our magnificent magnum opus Gutless Wonders.
- So we're talking eighth grade-ish.
- Yeah, I believe this was summer time,
so if I was 14, this is right before I went into high school
so this is pre freshman year in high school.
And we've established before
in previous episodes of "Good Mythical Morning,"
that Buies Creek was a pretty boring place
during the summer.
You had to create your own fun.
Of course one of the great things about Buies Creek
is that it had Campbell University,
so two 14 year old boys had access
to this huge campus.
- So the thing we did is we would just go into buildings
and explore.
- And if we could, we would try to get upon the roof
of said buildings.
- Well, I think this is the first instance
that inspired us to do that,
'cause I remember going in
the business administration building
and we were in the stairwell going up,
and you're just going up and you're looking,
oh, there's people in this floor,
let's go to the next floor.
There's people on that floor, let's go to the next floor.
I don't know what we were looking for,
just to like pillage or something.
We weren't gonna steal, we were just gonna rummage.
- We were gonna smuggle something in there.
- No, we weren't.
But then I remember people on every floor,
and then we get to the top of the stairwell,
and I remember we looked up, and there was a hatch.
- Yeah.
- And I remember we looked at the hatch,
and we looked at each other.
- And it was open.
- Looked at the hatch, looked at each other,
didn't say anything.
You need not say anything.
You know, you're a male, you're with another male,
you're in front of a ladder
that leads to a hatch,
you know, there's no discussion.
You went first.
- So we go through the hatch,
and before us we see the roof of the business school,
which is covered in little white pebbles,
it's one of those roofs-
- It's a flat roofs.
- It was actually more like rock-size.
They were like everything from that size
to like almost an inch, these white rocks
all over the top.
And here we are, standing on top
of a three-story building,
with white rocks all around us,
right next to Main Street, Buies Creek.
- And again, so we looked down at the rocks,
we looked at each other,
looked down at the rocks, look over the building,
look at each other, no need for discussion,
we know what we're gonna do.
- We're gonna start throwing rocks off the building.
- Wouldn't you?
- In every which way.
- Just because.
Like one at a time, two at a time.
- Tossing them.
- Like a whole...
Oh, just look, it looks like rain, but it's pebbles.
- And then we started taking the smaller ones,
because we weren't jerks, you know,
we were just a little mischievous.
We took the little pebbles and we tossed them at cars
going on Main Street.
- I didn't do that, I don't think.
- Which is like once every seven minutes in Buies Creek.
- I don't remember doing that per se.
Maybe you did that. - We didn't hit any.
I don't remember.
Just kind of popped them off the windshield a little bit,
the people would look around like what's going on?
Anyway, we had our fun
and then we're still up there, and all of a sudden-
- I remember hearing, "Boys?"
And we looked down, looked at each other, looked down.
And we immediately reacted by running back
away from the edge,
and realizing that whoever was calling boys
was probably talking to us
because they had seen us up there,
so running was kind of futile.
So I remember we kind of jerked away,
but then when we came back to the edge,
and we looked over, and guess who we saw down there?
- Leonard Johnson.
- You don't know Leonard Johnson?
- Lisa Johnson's dad.
- Lisa Johnson was the-
- I had a crush on Lisa Johnson.
- Holly Womo and Lisa Johnson,
you would fly to their houses in your dreams.
- In my dreams, yes.
- And her father was down there
looking up at us saying,
"Boys, is that you throwing rocks?"
I was like, "No, it must be somebody else
"up here throwing the rocks."
- No, I remember we just were silent.
It was more of a-
- Yeah, like don't incriminate.
Plead the fifth.
- No, it was, there's some other dudes behind us
on this building.
- Yeah, we didn't say anything.
- We just kind of just got quiet
and then he walked back in.
- He walked in.
- He just walked back in.
- And then okay, we're like,
well, he's coming up here after us,
so we ran down like a fire drill,
just ran out, got on our bikes or whatever
and got out of there, and escaped.
We made it out scot free.
Yes, we did it! - So the rest of the day
passes and I eventually go back to my home
and then my dad who taught summer school,
or usually was over there at Campbell,
teaching in the law school, he comes home at dinnertime.
But instead of just coming home, taking his coat off,
sitting down, he comes over to me,
and he says, "I got something I wanna talk to you about,
"come with me.
"Come to the bedroom."
- Come to the bedroom?
- So I go in there, I sit down.
Now let me preface this with the fact
that I, at the time, was 6'4, six feet four inches.
- That's taller than me now.
- Okay?
My dad was 5'10.
(Link chuckles)
- Okay, and still is.
- He had been looking up to me for a couple years
at this point.
- Okay.
- Now growing up, my parents punished me and my brother
in several different ways.
One of them was spanking, okay?
We were spanked on a fairly regular basis.
- It's a conventional method of discipline.
- But by the time I was 14,
I was like, I'm 14, I'm not gonna get spanked anymore.
- You're also not gonna throw rocks
off the business administration building, are you?
- Right.
So he says, "Leonard Johnson came by today."
Yeah, Leonard Johnson, Lisa Johnson's dad,
I got a crush on his daughter, but I won't tell you that.
(Link laughs)
"He said he saw you and Link throwing rocks
"off of the top of the business school at cars,
"is this true?"
And I said-
- You're like looking for a way to run away, right?
- There was no getting away from my dad.
He was in control.
I was just like, "Yes, it's true."
Sheepishly said, "Yes, it's true."
- It's not something to be proud of.
- He says, "Okay, bend over."
- (chuckles) That was it?
Bend over?
- And I'm like, is he really gonna spank me?
He's going to spank me on the bottom.
(Link laughs)
I'm 6'4.
- Not when you bend over.
(Rhett laughs)
- Long story short, I bent over,
and I received maybe two-
- Just two?
- Two very brisk wraps of the belt.
- Oh, he gave you a belt?
- Of course.
Now listen, I don't know what you guys think
about corporal punishment.
Is that what that's called?
- Yeah, that's right.
- All I know is, you know what I never did again?
I never threw rocks off the business school again.
I might've done it off the fine arts school.
- You didn't call me that night.
We go to school the next day,
and you come up to me and you tell me what's happened
and you also tell me that you have been grounded
for a week in addition to getting the spanking,
you were grounded for a week.
And my reaction was like, oh, suck for you, man.
Until I get home that night
and my mom's like, "Link, I talked to Jimmy and Diane
"and I heard what you and Rhett did,
"and you also are grounded for a week."
(Rhett laughs)
- She didn't say bend over though.
- She didn't say bend over.
- 'Cause you, unlike me, you were never spanked,
which explains a lot,
that's why you're not well behaved.
That's why you're a loose cannon.
- I was spanked a couple of times as a kid.
- By your mom?
- No, by Jimmy, my stepdad at the time.
- Oh yeah.
- He would spank me, and I deserved it,
and I'm in favor of it.
- Really? Okay, let's make that another episode.
- No, I'm in favor of it for myself, back then.
I'll clarify.
- Drill Sergeant Rhett yells at Private Link.
Listen here, you punk!
You came in here, you thought that this was gonna be
an easy ride!
You thought this was gonna be a Swedish prison!
This is no Swedish prison, this is base camp...
What do you call it?
Basic training!
And the basic idea here...
Oh, is this your friend?
- No, that's me.
- This is not you.
This is your friend, where's your friend at?
Where's your friend at?
- He paid me to jail sit for him.
- Really?
(playful music)