hmmm I don't want to get in trouble with
this one how can you get things for free
upgraded room or a comped room I
definitely recommend that you just ask
or complain about the view size or if
the rooms dirty your neighbors are loud
whatever the case may be be cool don't
make stuff up nobody cares about your
anniversary
the only anniversary I care about is the
one where you're handing me a twenty it
depends on the occupancy depends on the
person depends on the guests don't book
off the discount sites because we know
how little you paid for it so when it
comes to upgrades back at a-line I have
had people who have not wanted to pay
for the room and actually have come up
with nefarious ways to get things for
free they said that there was a rat in
the room
the security team went to investigate
and there was a little rat in the room
but in the trashcan there was a receipt
from Petsmart well the person and their
new pet rat got kicked out of the hotel
with no refund well there's always the
used condom excuse that's a classic
we found used condom under the pillow
dude no you did unless that was yours
what's the dirtiest thing in the room
all things fabric couches chairs the
weird blanket that they put on top for
the color accent discard it probably the
TV remote it's electronics so you can't
really just like to spray it down with
chemicals I think it's just kind of gets
put back on the desk and that's about it
people use the bathroom don't wash their
hands and they touch the remote after
relieving themselves in or out of the
bathroom have I had any weird celebrity
encounters and the answer to that is too
many to remember I've seen many
celebrities and their underwear nobody
that you actually want to see though I
had someone called me from the bathroom
and asked me to come system in the tub
and then she would do things to me if I
would do that for her sometimes
celebrities will check in under a
different name I had somebody stay at a
hotel one time and somebody asked me
what was that this person I was like no
we don't have anybody seeing in the
hotel if I haven't named one of the most
awkward moments and I'm not gonna name
drop any celebrities for example if say
Kim Kardashian was in front of me and I
didn't know who she was
okay what's the last name for the
reservation instant insult they
get really offended like have you
witnessed any porn shoes yeah I actually
helped the guys bring up their filming
equipment and they tipped me with a
sweatshirt that had the porn company
logo on it I mean it's a good view it's
a nice room the beds are beautiful I
don't blame them they kind of have the
attitude of like yeah we paid for this
room we're gonna do whatever the hell we
want in it do employees know when you
book a room to have a one-night stand
yes we do usually it's a bunch of
giggling snuggling making out on said
couch in front of employees and we're
just standing there like right so could
you kindly insert your credit card for
incidentals not only do we know that
you're there for a one-night stand but
we also knew who your wife is because
you checked in with her like an hour ago
on a different floor and when you call
down and ask us to deliver condoms we
also know that you're not really a
Magnum dude can you replace items from
the minibar without getting in trouble
you can try but it's really hard because
you got to find like a pony size bottle
of diet cherry coke and a can of M&Ms
you don't hard it is to find a can of
M&Ms everything in that minibar is
inventoried and everything will probably
be able to tell if it's not something
that we've already bought if you don't
want to pay for the seven dollar bottles
of water from the minibar you can just
go refill your same bottle down at the
fitness center by law they have to have
a water for you there why are people not
allowed to smoke in hotel rooms do you
know how long it takes to actually clean
a room that's have a smoke owner in it
it's a health hazard number one number
two it knocks out a room for a week I'm
not gonna have somebody smoke in a room
and then when a teenage kid goes to lay
down on the pillow like mommy it smells
like camel do I know and when people are
smoking weed in the room yes I've had to
go and inquire like no we're not smoking
do we say anything about all the pens
men you Sharon
weed nobody cares about because we know
they're not gonna be causing any trouble
after third it's gonna be sitting around
and watching movies and raiding the
minibar that's the clientele we want so
just be a nice person treat everybody
well enjoy yourself make our lives
easier and will make your stay
incredible
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