Has your love life been stuck in a rut lately? Maybe you should spice it up with a stay at
a motel, hotel...
Hey lovers Julia here for DNews
Before we dive into learning about spicing up your love life with vacation sex, if you’re
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So, it’s no secret that after a while, sometimes love loses it’s spark. Couples get stressed
and busy and sex just doesn’t seem to be a priority any more. Some might turn to expert
advice, a sex therapist might tell you to try new things or get away for some quality
time. But, simple hotel sex might be just what the doctor ordered.
According to a 2004 National Leisure Travel Monitor study, one third of couples reported
they had more sex while on vacation. So clearly people are already taking advantage of a little
get away!
So what is about a hotel that gets people all hot and heavy? Well for one it sets the
mood. A hotel room, could ease stress. Psychotherapist Ian Kerner says getting out of the house might
be away to leave all your cares behind literally. In a hotel, there’s no distractions or reminders
of life’s daily stressors. No bills to be paid, no laundry thrown all over the floor.
He told the Huffington Post that in a hotel “you’re in a place out of time, out of
your life” and this “creates a boundary [between yourself] and anxiety and stressors
of everyday life, [which] is going to contribute to sexual arousal."
And he’s not the psychologist who thinks a get away is a good idea. Participating in
a new experience with your loved one can bring back that old spark in other ways. Social
Psychologist Dr. Arthur Aron, believes that when couples are first in love they stay up
all night learning about each other. This facilitates what’s called self expansion,
when you include the other person as part of yourself. That buzz wears off after while,
but Aron told the New York Times that he thinks “couples can get some of that back by doing
challenging and exciting things together.”
But don’t just take psychologist's word for it. Your brain thinks so too. Sex in a
new environment is definitely a change of pace, and the sheer novelty of the situation
may help bring back the spark! We are wired to get a kick out of new things, new things
help improve memory and learning.
And one study published in the journal Neuron found out how. In a cleverly designed study,
the researchers found that new photos participants had never seen before activated the midbrain,
but the photos they had seen did not. The midbrain is part of our brain's reward system.
Specifically the substantia nigra/ventral tegmental area, is responsible for a lot of
our motivations and rewards, but it also plays a role in dopamine production. So, basically,
the researchers found that experiencing novelty effects dopamine levels. And this hit of dopamine
makes us feel pretty good for evolutionary reasons. The researchers said that "Seeking
new and unfamiliar experiences is a fundamental behavioural tendency in humans and animals”.
And if you remember some earlier DNews episodes, you might know that dopamine is often called
the pleasure hormone, since it’s released during pleasurable experiences like eating
sweets and yes sex. We get little rewards when we do certain things that benefit us.
Dopamine is a complex neurotransmitter, and it does more than just reward us, it also
drives our desires and it’s released with the anticipation of a pleasurable experience,
even if that experience never happens. Anticipation can be pleasurable all on it's own. So, a
new experience with your loved one might prime the brain for a pleasurable experience to
come.
So get your of your relationship rut and go check into the nearest hotel and get your
love on! Sex is such a huge part of the human experience, heck it’s a huge part of the
experience of all life. But why? Why do we have sex at all? Trace has the answer in this
video, right here.