You're watching "Love & Hip Hop: Hollywood"...
Season five.
...watch the show...
...for the very first time.
You'll be getting our natural and honest reactions.
...with you.
The scene you're about to see is my good sis, K. Michelle,
sitting down with this super sinner Akbar.
♪♪
What's up, girl?
Ohh!
Hello, how you doing?
Whoa-ho-ho!
This is what's going on in Hollywood?
So you been trying to get some studio time?
(sighing)
First of all, he walked in there like a weird-(bleep) pimp daddy.
"What's up, girl?" But my friend looks cute though.
Yeah, I'm trying to get a couple artists in the studio,
Oh, okay.
So I want 'em in the right environment.
I want everything to be proper.
It's recruiting season.
Tell me the truth.
He start... (mocking laugh)
Sis, he can't tell you the truth.
He doesn't know how to tell the truth.
And he kissed your hand like he was chivalrous and stuff,
but chivalry went out the door with all 16 of his wives, bitch.
What you wanna know?
I personally don't beat around the bush.
Just not me. Did you leak the tape of Teairra?
I did not do that.
Was your wife that did it?
He's a liar!
Was it your wife? Was it your girlfriend?
Was it your mistress?
Was it your housemaid?
I'm not gon' say.
(humming melody)
Well, she did rub someone the wrong way.
What the (bleep)? So did he just admit to leaking TT--
them tapes to T?
If you put some sex tape out there,
it gotta be a great performance, you know what I'm saying?
It's not a real porno 'cause she couldn't take that.
Couldn't take what?
The pipe. That wasn't her thing.
She couldn't take the pipe.
I'm dead serious. I'm being honest.
I mean, I actually thought it was a pretty-- it was a stellar performance.
I thought she did a good-- both hands.
I thought it was a stellar moment.
You need to drink something. Jesus, amen.
He's the devil for sure.
And if he's not (bleep) the devil,
bitch, he's Ray J's brother, and Ray J's the devil.
He's for sure going to (bleep) hell for that.
Let me show you how to make a real prayer.
Dear Heavenly Father, forgive him
for all his past and future transgressions,
for he is just a sinner as we all are.
But, Jesus, he's more of a sinner than everybody else,
'cause this is some bull(bleep), amen.
How did it go down? Like, what happened?
Can you handle the truth? I wanted to introduce her
to multiple women, to the lifestyle.
Cornball.
Ooh! Come on, K!
You too could be a winner.
Not your little pictures.
Wait! Did he just invite her to be a part of the lifestyle?
You're more beautiful in person.
You're a smooth talker.
That's why you're in trouble.
No, no, no. (laughing)
(mocking laugh) I know that (bleep).
I'm being truthful though.
The lighter the eyes, the bigger the lies.
No, two.
With you, it'd be three, yeah.
What?
Are you kidding? She's like the fish that you put in the tank
with all these other fish and she eats all the fish.
Stop!
Give me-- Give me a shot!
What do you mean, "Give me a shot"?
Like, sir, you've been shooting your shots everywhere.
Nobody wants your injections.
We want the ones that cure, not kill.
So what's up? So we gon' work or what?
Oh, I don't put myself in foolery.
What? That's not what's up.
You came over here asking about some foolery.
I'm not here to judge. You know, live your life. Do what you have to do.
Well, don't shoot your shot at me.
I'm not that type girl.
Hurt people hurt people. That's why he's been stabbing everybody with (bleep).
'Cause he's hurt.
Hey, look. To each his (bleep) own.
I'm trying to get like Akbar.
The next scene you're about to see is two artists
and two friends coming together in a rehearsal space
to pray about loose boxes and empty bank accounts.
♪♪
I love Jay Will.
He look like he's mad. He look like he got a little 'tude.
Yeah, he's upset. What's going on?
Yes!
La'Britney!
(screaming)
Ooh! Who's that girl?
Who's that girl? Okay! Okay!
How did it go?
My performance went great. You know, I killed it.
And then after that, I felt like it kind of went left.
The panel was very adamant of preferring Kandi. And I can't lie.
Kandi does give more of a...
Kandi gives vibes, Kandi gives flavor, Kandi gives hair.
Look at me looking like I care.
They tried to compare me and you.
And I'm sitting up there like,
"No shade but shade, please don't compare her where she can't compete."
Oh... wait.
Whenever somebody say, "No shade but shade," it's shady.
Baby, I'm not bitter, I'm just saying--
Quit acting like a little bitch!
I'ma be real with you. You know how many times
I've auditioned for things, I didn't make it?
Like, we just gotta have tough skin, bro.
Tough skin whether it's lady skin or man skin.
If you was a real friend, you wouldn't even do it,
because it's like you would see my point of view.
Hell no!
'Cause I got picked and you didn't,
I'm not supposed to make that paper?
No!
Actually, I'll be in London,
so you can have that little gig.
This bitch is booked and paid while you're not booked...
Ha ha! Bitch, you a period!
A1 gon' be with you? I'm sure he flying with you.
Why you so worried about me and A1?
(both) Whoa!
Moniece.
Moniece, the bitch who's (bleep) been from the East Coast...
...back down South, and back to the West Coast?
Huh? Huh, bitch?!
Moniece's vagina, La'Britney's vagina.
The vaginas, A1's (bleep).
She had her geography right,
but that's not where my vagina-- wait, let me think.
I date a (bleep) from the East Coast.
I never dated a (bleep) from the South.
And I have dated a (bleep) from the West Coast.
But, bitch, it looks like you want my (bleep) all in your mouth.
Listen!
Your engine's about to go out, bitch.
So... it sounds like your (bleep) went from the East
to the South, to the Midwest, to the West,
back to the East, back to the West.
Looks like your engine and your transmission are busted.
This (bleep) has been everywhere, Lord!
I want you to just give this (bleep) forgiveness.
Are they talking to Jesus about (bleep)?
Please heal all loose boxes, starting with La'Britney's, the loosest of 'em all!
Lord, please...
Heal this mother(bleep) bank account 'cause you ain't got (bleep), you broke bitch!
I make. I make.
Living in Compton, making (bleep) videos!
You're getting paid (bleep) 99!
Oh, my God.
I think he said, "(bleep) 99."
Can we have a moment of silence for that?
Can we just pray for "(bleep) 99"?
Whoo! Jesus!
I'm going to church Sunday just because of that.