I once ruined the date when I punched
myself in the face David see what was
the context we're doing party tricks and
she was doing all these kind of like
she's a double-jointed she was did you
punch out with her face she was like
coming in so what's your party trick I
was like well I can kind of do this
punching thing we're like I don't
actually punch myself but I kind of like
move with it you know like but I still
get the sound I've got a massive neck
yes show us it sure okay so he's
basically like there's like no you know
nothing actually her but wow it looks
pretty good right Jamie if you're trying
to impress a young lady on a first date
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to find anything better than
so as you can see that it's not great
and that was the problem what I did is I
kind of like forgot to move with it
because that's all thing you move I
clipped my jaw and the side of my cheek
so I bleeding she didn't realize this
but I could feel the blood spilling out
so I went to the toilet I won't have you
back in there
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it wasn't stopping it was like tongue on
my mouth and it was like literally
pouring around my mouth and then I
started getting paranoid because I'm
like I've been in there for a while
she's gonna think I'm having to prove
nothing the toilet with some of the
things you've got a period your mouth
bleeding
yeah I was in there for at least around
15 minutes it wasn't stopping and then I
just went home and I turned my phone off
and I never saw her again
serious he walked out of the restaurant
I couldn't how far through the meal were
you know I mean we were just waiting for
stars it was like so she sat there like
this still if you waiting for starters
that means you've ordered the meal so a
bill is coming yeah look I'm sorry yeah
we should be in touch with you to ask
what happens mmm well yeah kind of I
didn't reply in your first date Victoria
the first time there must have been the
first time when you and David went out
together what was his party trick what
did David do for you David went for the
wall old school sort of wit and charm no
no let me get this why why'd you dropped
although I was already besotted before
we even went on the date he could have
punched himself in the face I wouldn't
I've actually got the taste of vomit in
my mouth
how does this seem to me it seems
ungentlemanly it is I'm very ashamed of
it and it was a long time ago six years
ago I would never do that again
you're so obviously embarrassed about it
I think it must be true what do you
think I think it might well be true as
well I think it's true okay you're
saying true yeah I said was it true or
was it a lie it was true
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