Welcome back to the Gentleman's Gazette!
In today's video, we discuss the ad we believe the best a man can be which has been quite
controversial in the last few days.
Because we're called the Gentleman's Gazette and we hold ourselves out to help men be gentlemen,
we thought it was a good time to discuss what it means to be a gentleman or masculinity
and men in general.
So without further ado, let's watch the video and I'll comment along.
Okay so it's obviously about the me too movement, honestly, to me, saying, Gillette, the best
a man can get, it's like saying McDonald's, the highest quality health food a man can
get.
It's just a complete empty statement that couldn't be further from the truth but again,
that's just my opinion.
Yeah, bullying is not something a gentleman should engage in, neither is sexual harassment,
but if we actually take a step back and look at a piece that we created in 2016, it's called
what it means to be a gentleman today, and we simply tried to analyze what it means in
this day and age because you know back in the day, there were simply different terms
for gentleman right?
It used to be a courteous or honorable man but all those things don't necessarily ring
true anymore in this day and age.
So we came up with these 11 points, right?
One is a gentleman is imperfect.
A gentleman has high standards, he's well dressed, he has good manners, he's open-minded,
he's interesting and informed, his actions match his words and he treats other people
with respect.
Now, when you touch a woman's ass, that's anything but respectful because you just treat
her as an object, right?
So I know there was a time when this was considered okay or men would say "Well, she wants it"
Frankly, I'm happy to live in this day and age where everyone should be able to decide
whether they can be touched or not and they can express feelings and they're in control
what happens to their body and not someone else.
Honestly, I would agree!
Just laughing things off or saying "Oh, it's not that big of a deal"l is not gonna solve
the deeper issue of an imbalance of power that is often there.
Now, don't get me wrong!
Everything we do is for men and we will never do a ladies Gazette or a Woman's Gazette because
we're passionate about helping men and becoming better.
Now a great man who is often not discussed at first when it comes to a gentleman, Vin
Diesel.
He had those wise words to say "Being male is a matter of birth, being a man is a matter
of age but being a gentleman is a matter of choice" and to me, that really rings home
because it is very very true.
I didn't have a decision in whether I'm a man or not, I was born that way.
When I turned 18, I became a man but by trying to become better every day and to live to
a certain standard where I treat others with respect, I hold myself out to be a gentleman
where I'm aspiring to be one.
I know it's hard, we all make mistakes, I did them and
we're not always on our A game, however, that doesn't mean that we can't strive to be that.
Okay, so in this case, for example, I doubt the gentleman actually thinks that he's behaving
in an ungentlemanly way but by touching her and saying what she's actually trying to say
is he's basically belittling her right? and you never as a gentleman want to belittle
others, you want to treat them respectfully and a question to ask is, would he have treated
a man or would he have treated an equal like that?and the answer is probably not because
putting your hand on someone's shoulder and trying to articulate what they want to say
is usually what you do with a little boy or when you basically want to show that they're
just learning and they're not up to par yet to talk at the table with the big shots.
Now, boys will be boys, yes!
I was a boy.
Boys are often more rambunctious, they want to fight, and they want to have little toy
weapons and while all that is okay, it's not okay to accept other kids being bullied or
beaten up simply because they're different and frankly, when I was a boy, I engaged in
behavior where we had one guy in our school and we knew that he would kind of flip out
or go crazy when we just kind of teased him and so we would tease him just to get that
reaction.
Looking back, that was a very ungentlemanly behavior and I think it would have been great
if someone would have stepped up and gone in between and told us boys "Hey it's not
okay to do that" and rather than just ignoring it and letting us tease that boy who probably
had a very hard time.
Yes, it's true.
The me-too movement is here, it is real and it's good.
I think that it's a subject of discussion because oftentimes, it was not discussed or
just treated as something that is not worth being discussed.
I don't know to me it seems more like a marketing slogan that they try to use to push their
products but if I remove myself from that, I think being a gentleman is inherently connected
to improving and getting better, taking criticism, and just learn from it and grow.
What I mean by that is if we stop getting better, we already stopped being good and
it's something that all Oliver Cromwell once said and it was a very wise slogan.
So just because this ad is bringing up negative behavior that some men, not all men express
or demonstrate, doesn't mean that all men are bad but I think it's a good reminder to
just reevaluate our own behavior because I think, often, we don't think about our own
behavior as bad but others, particularly women, look at it and feel like it's sexist whereas
we think "oh it's totally okay" In my opinion, it's just good to take a step back and say
"hey what behaviors do i display that may be sexist?
For example, the other day we got some books from Germany and I was just reading them to
my daughter and they were about you know market squares and firefighters and policemen and
I was just reading it to her and my wife said "oh well it's not just a fireman which is
the word for firefighter in German but also a firewoman" and so once I took a closer look
at it, I realized all the activities of firefighters or policemen, it was all male across the board,
all the construction workers, it was all male.
Now, yes, it's true most of our time these jobs are run by men but women can do them
as well and by having books and just teaching our little children that only men can do those
things, we engage in sexist behavior and I didn't even realize it so it's just sometimes
good to take a step back and think about those things.
What's displayed here is more like a form of civil courage.
When you see something that is not okay, you speak up and I think as a gentleman, that's
always the honorable thing to do, you don't just walk away and let others do their thing
but if you see that someone is getting beaten up, speak up.
If you see that a woman is maybe harassed or treated in a way that makes her uncomfortable,
speak up and give her the feeling of comfort and I think that's something where, we as
men, can just reevaluate our behavior and think what we're doing is truly respecting
others, including women.
Yeah, that's another aspect of it right?
If we're men and we are insecure in ourselves, it's great to help others feel better and
empower them and ultimately, being a person that others want to be around with, that helps
them to grow rather than someone who tries to push him down or belittles them.
I think that's something that we can all aspire to as human beings and just as men or women
or LGBT, it doesn't matter.
It's just equality that great people have.
Yeah, it's the old game right?
Do as I say, not do as I do.
Living by example is a lot more powerful than just telling people what to do and actually
showing, as a dad or someone who is an important figure in someone else's life and acting responsibly,
has a huge impact which is why a lot of sports people oftentimes get disciplined if they
don't act well in public because it has such a big impact on kids and if it's okay for
other people to do stuff, then little kids think it's okay for them to do stuff.
So our actions don't just affect ourselves but also others who look up to us.
So keep that in mind!
The best a man can get, looking at the ad as a whole, I think a lot of people got offended
by it because they felt like it was just pointing out negative things about men.
Now, I think it pointed out certain aspects of negative male behavior that is sometimes
displayed and it's something that men can change, that they can get over with.
A lot of men don't actually do this stuff which is great and men are important in our
society, right?
I mean men fight in the military, men help to rescue others, the suicide rate for men
is higher, depression rate for men is higher, so men sacrifice a lot in our society and
it doesn't mean that men are not valued or that they have to change everything they do
but there are certain aspects where we engage in a certain sexist behavior or we do things
that belittle others and I think that can be changed and that's a valid point.
Do I think Gillette did that because they genuinely believe in that?
Frankly, I don't know.
I'm rather doubtful.
To me, it's a big marketing thing because they're really having a hard time, from a
business point of view, they're selling products to women and they just want to be a part of
the conversation and clearly, with 24 million views after just a week, they're achieving
that goal.
Will it help them turn around sales?
I don't know, I'm rather doubtful because the product itself sucks but at the end of
the day, I think it's good to discuss these things and bring men to think about their
behavior and maybe have others think about their behavior too.
Just because being a woman doesn't mean you can't
belittle others or you can be unfair to others.
If you look at things like the CEOs of Fortune 500 companies, do you realize that 95% of
men or an average, men still earn more than women not necessarily because they do better
work but because they're traditionally considered to be the breadwinner so it is just something
to consider and looking at overall wealth, I mean 88% of all billionaires today are men.
I think we have some ways to go to achieve true gender equality but that doesn't mean
I have to be apologetic of being a man and I'm very secure in who I am but it doesn't
mean that I can't improve.
I try to improve every day, I want to make our website better, I want to make our products
better, I want to be a better dad, and I want to treat people better and having that mindset,
I think helps me and if I'm just shutting down when someone criticizes me and just say
"oh I'm offended I'm not gonna do or buy this product again" because they criticize me in
a way, then that stops me from from getting better because I have a picture of myself
in mind and by putting down any valid criticism, you're just actually holding yourself back
from achieving that level.
So again, I'm not telling you what to do or that you're a bad person, I'm just saying
reconsider your behavior think about it and be conscious of it and that's what you can
do to be a better man and therefore, you can strive to be a gentleman and aspire to be
that and help others and help them grow and be a better person.
I know it was a slightly different video if you enjoyed it please leave some comments
and let me know what you thought and see you again with another video about Canada goose
on Friday.