Greetings, lack of gentle viewers.
And welcome back to Silas University.
I'm here stuck in this sentient magical library,
giving myself diabetes.
But on the plus side,
it sure does annoy the heck out of my vampire ex-girlfriend.
LaFontaine also found this magical door that leads to distant lands.
Cyberpunk dystopia.
Sweet.
Hello, Chicken Nuggets.
I'm not interrupting anything, am I?
Oh, fiddle-sticks, is that a transmission from the Dean
a.k.a. our possessed friend Perry?
I'll get you and your little pet.
That bleeping-bleep of a bleeping McBleeperson bleepedie bleep bleep.
That's it, I need to kill her.
We can't kill her, she's my best friend.
That bleeping-bleep of my mother is up to something.
Why don't we bros this season and stop your mother together?
I mean, I am the most logical character.
Ugh, alright, I guess so, science freak.
Could be worse.
Sure, whatever, don't mind me.
I'll just be over here crafting,
regretting things from my past.
Girl, you're tripping.
What happened to the old Laura I used to know?
She's gone now and I'm sad.
Wait, what are these weird magical glasses?
And why do they want me to wear them?
Huh, this is...
[Struggling]
"Hello, idiots."
Huh, there are glowing runes that are more sarcastic than I am.
But I guess they are telling us how to stop my mother.
Let's go through the magical door.
It's not like I'm accident-prone or anything.
Oh no, but, Chinmilla you might get hurt.
Not that I care or...any-...thing.
[Aggressive scrubbing]
Hey, frosh, we're back and we found the Book of Lives.
Well, I am the protagonist, so I know how to solve everything.
We just need to find four talismans to stop your mother.
God, you're amazing.
Yeah, I like probably still have feelings for you and fantasize about going to Paris.
I would secretly like that.
Oh Hermione, I just made this awkward, didn't I?
Here, I'll just take off my dead sister's necklace
to make you feel better, Cupcake, Cutie-Pie, Sugar, Honey Bear.
Wow, feelings make me uncomfortable.
I don't have feelings for Chinmilla.
Just figure it out.
I'm gonna go experiment on something.
I guess LaF's right.
We should probably talk about stuff.
Maybe we could just be friends.
Well, to be honest, I'd really rather bone you after that yoga routine-
but...sure.
Hello again, Little Wormy Muppet Poodles.
Now what, you bleeping bleep bleep-
Well, I'll find a way to get you and your little friends.
Eh, she's bluffing.
Am I though?
I'm here to check out a book.
Uh great, the Amazon woman.
Shut up, Fang Face.
What's the matter, Hollis?
I'm sexy evil vampire now.
Wanna get down?
Yeah, hard pass.
Seriously, but I, like, dyed my hair and ripped off Carmilla's style and everything.
I thought you liked the bad girls.
Would you stop with your lesbian drama?
I need the other talismans, so I can continue being a Douche-Canoe.
Get away from my daughter!
You you you...bleeps.
Oh my God, Dad!
Laura Eileene Hollis, I saw your videos
and we are getting out of here.
You deserve a b-better girl.
Wait, you're leaving?
I mean, I guess I'm gonna go.
Psych! I'm totally gonna stay and so is my dad.
Dang.
They blocked again.
I guess you're not so bad for a blood-sucker.
Yeah, I guess you're not so bad either.
We both love Laura.
Ah, my dad and my ex are friends.
This isn't weird at all.
This must be what having an aneurysm feels like.
Ah, come on, he's proud of you.
My dad thought me the equivalent of a tradeable goat.
Right, sorry for being insensitive, I'm just...I'm a realist now.
What? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.
Yeah, well, you're the most ridiculous...thing I've ever...wanted to kiss.
[ROMANCE]
[Oh my..]
[What is...going on?]
Yo, stop sucking face for one second.
We've got the Sword of Hastur.
Now we just need to find the other two talismans.
L-Laura, cleanliness is best so I cleaned the sword
and it looks like there is something written on it.
It says "Secret Necklace"
which must be my sister's locket, but...
dang, I lost it!
I took it, Darlings.
[Evil ghost laughter]
Holy freaking science Batman!
I thought that I was an atheist, but it turns out the Dean is a...
I'm a demi-god, you Dingle-berries.
Rad.
Well, maybe we should use some magic and summon a Goddess to help,
whose name...
well...
nobody can really pronounce.
Ah, fine, but let's make out some more first.
[MORE ROMANCE]
[LaF is uncomfortable]
So, yeah, that's gonna be habit forming.
Come on, frosh. Quit talking to the webcam, we need to do a montage.
[Science!]
[Or magic...]
[Who knows]
Huh, I guess it didn't work.
Boo!
[Oh snap!]
"Love will have its Sacrifices" by Soles
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