♪♪
Oh.
Fidget spinner.
I don't understand these.
How do they work?
It's like this.
Ah!
Watch this.
First try, right here.
[gasp]
[clapping]
That's why you're the Dark Lord.
Magic.
[whispering]: Oh Snape.
[snapping]
Oh, Snape.
[crowd]: Oh Snape!
Can you please move its head?
She just wants to have some contact with you.
Some contact?
She had plenty of contact last night when I had to milk her.
[rock music]
You know, to be honest, I'm not entirely sure
I shall show these Mudbloods how to milk a snake.
[Deep voice]: Careful.
She's in the pits.
The key is...
I can't believe there are glands here.
[dripping]
It's kind of like chopsticks.
I like to think of the snake as a--
[chopsticks plays]
Fortune cookie.
And I like to afterwards just show this snake respect.
You whisper to it in snake language.
[buzzer]
Parsel--
Parseltongue. Tongue.
[breaking glass]
Oh my gosh.
I can't believe you just said that.
Parseltongue, you whisper, "I thank you for your milk."
[whispering in Parseltoungue]
I thank you for your milk, may your days be long.
[whispering in Parseltongue]
There.
[oriental music plays]
Snake language.
And then three bows.
Mom, I'm filming.
Your mom's alive?
She's still-- Yes, she's alive.
She came over last Saturday.
I never thought of you as having parents.
I need to go, I'm sorry.
That was your mom that came over?
Yes, the one you hit on twice?
I regret it now!
Ask her if she--
did she say anything about...
No, she didn't.
All right.
Leave it alone.
No, I'm fine, whatever.
All right, I'll talk to you later.
Bye Mom, thank you.
Bye Mrs... [whispers] Snape.
Do you know how many hours it takes
to produce this much milk from a snake?
17?
[buzzer]
Snape: 70 hours.
Oh, good.
I'm-- I want to.
[sip]
You just drank two hours of work.
So worth it.
Let me show you how a man drinks his snake milk.
[laughing]
[rock music]
Mm.
Don't like the sound that just came out of me.
[laughing]
and you're the next Arnold Schwarzenecker.
Business idea!
[electronic music]
Oh my goodness.
[laughing]
Snake milk formula.
Mothers will eat this up,
or should I say...
That's deceptive, though.
Look at this.
There's a hole in the side of my robe
and it's not a pocket.
Not all holes are pockets.
Yeah, wisely put, Severus.
Words to live by.
I'll write that in my journal.
Ask her if she wants some.
No, that would be like eating your own eggs or something.
♪♪
I-- you know what's good though--
What?
--is chocolate snake milk.
Chocolate snake milk?
Or strawberry snake milk.
[groaning]
Apparently I haven't lived.
I've just had blueberry snake mlik.
Yeah, well that's alright.
[whispering in Parseltongue]
Look at you go!
I've been working on it.
I'm taking Rosetta Stone.
So good, right?
Their newest language is snake language.
[buzzer]
[glass breaking]
Thank you for watching.
Please share, subscribe, and like.
Post your questions that you might have for us
in the comments below.
Perhaps we will ask-- [buzzer] or answer, rather.
We could ask them too.
Perhaps we will answer them next time.
We should ask them next time.
Let me-- we're cutting this part out.
Time turn.
Zoot zoot zoot.