-Look at the Timbos. -Oh, yeah. Yeah.
-These are the gettin' money Timbs.
You can't have Green Timbs if you don't -- if you're not rich.
I'm trying to be like you, Jimmy.
-Oh, I mean come on, please. -Drake sent me these.
They have fur on the inside.
-Ooh. -Oh, my gosh.
See, that's when you know. Now you're living it up.
-You know what I'm saying? -You're living the life.
-Let me cross my leg so you can see them better.
-No. [ Laughter ]
Welcome back to the show.
-Thanks for having us back. -We love having you back
because I love hearing your opinion,
your take on different stuff.
And I love your show on VICELAND.
You guys are crushing it. It's really great.
-Thank you, Jimmy. -Congrats on everything.
Now, usually when you're here,
you guys agree on a lot of stuff together.
Because you're -- you guys have got good chemistry.
Is there anything that you don't agree on?
-Surprisin-- -Filet-O-Fish.
-Yes. -He buzzed in first.
-Yes. -Yeah, he did.
-He buzzed in -- He buzzed in first.
-He feels strongly... -Ding! Ding!
-...about the Filet-O-Fish. -Filet-O-Fish?
-Filet-O-Fish is a de--
is a evil cancer square created to destroy America.
-Who doesn't like Filet-O-Fish? -Let me tell you something.
When you walk into a McDonald's,
who do you see eating a Filet-O-Fish?
Somebody on the edge of death with a black coffee.
[ Laughter ] -With what?
-A 95-year-old person
with a Filet-O-Fish and a black coffee.
-A black coffee.
-Staring into -- staring into the abyss of death
in their black coffee. -Let me get this straight.
Jimmy Kimmel's audience -- Not Jimmy Kimmel.
Jimmy Fallon's -- Sorry. I'm sorry.
[ Audience groans ] [ Buzzer ]
[ Blues music plays ]
Hey.
-[ Laughs, coughs ]
-I would like to -- -We never --
We never liked Desus anyway.
The Mero show. The Mero show on VICE.
-I'm so emotional because I heard the slandering
of the Filet-O-Fish...
the heavenly ambrosia that McDonald's gives us.
-It's like kissing Ariel from "The Little Mermaid."
-That's where -- The heavenly ambrosia is --
That's what a Filet-O-Fish is.
-That's what -- A little tarter sauce.
Mwah!
-We're on TV four nights a week, this guy's eating Filet-O-Fish.
We got to do better. -Do we?
-We got to do better.
-I'm only eating Filet-O-Fish because we're on TV now.
You don't want to know what I was eating before.
I had a strictly Steak Umms diet.
It was disgusting.
-I also want your take on this.
I heard that you're a little -- you're a little upset
that you were snubbed. -Oh, yeah.
-And I don't want to make you... -Yeah.
-...any more upset than you are right now.
And this is -- I don't -- -This is trickery.
-Audience, don't freak out.
But you guys were not cast in the new live...
-Yeah. Yeah. -..."Lion King."
-The new "Lion King."
-Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. -Timon and Pumbaa.
-I mean, Timon and Pumbaa, you would have been perfect.
-When you think Timon and Pumbaa,
do you not see us?
-I think it's you. -Come on.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-When you think of Timon and Pumbaa,
you think of two African animal creatures...
-You know what I'm saying? -...walking around in Timbs...
-You know what I mean? -...giving advice to lions.
Yo, Simba!
-Simba, yo! -Yo, Simba!
-Simba, yo, don't go to that bodega!
They got robbed last week. -Yo. Yo.
Yo. Yo, yo, yo. -Don't go there!
-Yo, don't trust your uncle, Simba.
Nah. He up to something. -Chill. Chill.
Yo, Scar's shady, bro.
-Yo, we going to the Serengeti. Let's go.
Rrr! -Rrr!
[ Laughter ]
-Now, you don't want that?
-Come on. -Come on!
-Why didn't they call you guys? That's ridiculous.
-You know what it is? 'Cause we didn't really apply.
-You didn't audition? -Yeah, I didn't know.
I didn't know you had to do that.
I though that you just went on Twitter and were like,
"Yo, we want to be in this movie," then it just happened.
-I just went on Twitter and was like, @Disney --
"Yo, me and Mero. Boom." -Boom. Let's do it.
-That's apparently -- You have to go through agents
and other things. -Yeah.
-Yeah, you have to audition.
You guys don't audition for that stuff.
-Audition sounds like a lot.
What, I'm gonna get up and work, and --
-Yeah. Yeah. -Nah. Come on, man.
[ Laughter ]
-No, you don't have to do that. You don't do that for your --
-An audition is like trying. -Yeah, we don't try.
-We don't like to try too much. -It either is or it isn't.
That's all it is. You know what I'm saying?
-Because, well -- well, your thing -- you guys started,
what, on Twitter and then led to the podcast?
And now -- And now you've done 200 shows.
-Yeah. -200 shows.
-200 shows.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-Yo!
-That's -- -Respect.
-Look, LeBron got 30,000, we got 200.
I feel like ours is more impressive.
-It's the same. We're right there.
-It took more to do 200 than it did for LeBron
to drop 3,000 -- 30,000 points. -30,00 points, yeah.
Absolutely. 100%.
-Are you guys having fun still?
-I am. -Eh, yeah.
[ Laughter ] Yeah.
-At one point in my life,
I was picking up dead rats at an auto mechanic shop,
so I'm gonna this is a little better than that.
-Wow. Is that right?
-Also, you know, I have four kids,
so any time I spend out of the house, you know, is great.
[ Laughter ]
I love y'all, though.
-Hopefully they're not still up watching this.
-Yeah, they shouldn't even be awake.
-They might be. -Yeah, who knows.
But what's next?
What's next for "Desus & Mero"?
-Oh, man, we got the book coming.
-Book coming. You know what I'm saying?
-You're putting a book out? -A real book, too.
Random House -Random House?
-But it's not one of those books where we're gonna
come through the train and sell it to you.
-No. No. -It's a real book.
You can get it at Barnes & Noble and Amazon.
-Yeah. -It's not stapled in the middle
and you lay it out. -[ Laughs ]
-It's G-Unit publishing. -Okay?
-It's not all hip-hop. Some of it.
-Some of it is. -It's a lifestyle book.
-It's about how two different lives
'cause, you know, he has four kids.
Maybe at 2:00 in the morning,
you catch me on the F train eating Tide Pods.
We live different lives.
[ Laughter ]
-Do not eat Tide Pods.
-Don't eat Tide Pods, America.
-Why not? Why not?
-Cause it's -- -Nah, Big --
Big Government told you not to eat Tide Pods.
-That's not the reason why I'm not eating Tide Pods.
It's laundry detergent. Don't eat laundry detergent.
-Who told you that? -Ice-T.
[ Laughter ] -Okay. All right. Okay.
-Okay. All right.
-Ice-T told me not to do it.
-I thought about it.
-If you said the surgeon general, I would be like, "Nah."
But you said Ice-T. I say, "Okay."
[ Laughter ]
-He's on "Law & Order." He knows this.
-He does. Yeah.
-"I used to see this back in Narcotics."
-Would you -- Would you ever go on tour?
-Yes, we're actually going on tour.
-Yes, we are going on tour. -We're going on tour.
Thanks for hooking it up. -Wow.
Look at you with the segue, boy. Teeing it up.
[ Laughter ]
-We're going to --
-Hey, dude, if I didn't do that, I wouldn't be Jimmy Kimmel.
-Exactly! -Hey!
[ Laughter ] -Hey! Hey!
[ Cheers and applause ]
My guy! My guy!
-You know that, man.
I'm the one and only, man. Come on.