Heya playa, be honest here.
Do you suck at texting?
Is texting something you're just not good at?
You don't really send interesting messages, you don't keep that person engaged, overall
it's just boring?
Don't worry, in this video, I'm going to share how to not have boring conversations, how
to make them more lively and interesting so you can keep that person engaged.
For those of you that are new here my name is Josh and every single Monday through Friday
I make videos sharing tips, ideas and stories teaching you how to be your best self, now
the best way not to have a boring conversation is to have something planned a little ahead
of time before you message them.
What I don't mean by that is to have fully scripted conversations and stories that you
can tell.
You want things to flow honest and naturally but I think it doesn't hurt to have openers
that you can use just to keep the conversation from falling flat.
And to me the best openers are questions, they're things that you can ask that person
to get a natural and real response from them.
For example, you might want to ask them something like "What's your most favorite movie?
Of all the movies you've seen over the years, which is the one that really sticks with you?
Or say something like "I've never been one to really believe in ghosts but there's been
a lot of freaky things going on so I wanted to get your opinion, do you think ghosts are
real?".
These are fun and unique ways to start a conversation.
It breaks from the traditional role of just going "What's up?", "How's your day going?",
"What are you up to?".
Now if you're interested in learning more openers, I've put together a free guide of
20 ice breaker conversation starters, I'll link it up at the end of this video, you can
check it out, it's gonna give you what to talk about, what to say afterwards and how
to respond if they give you different types of answers.
But avoiding a boring conversation is more than just having a good or fun opener, it's
really being able to keep a conversation going.
So it's on you to kind of bring fuel into it.
To kind of having something to talk about with them so that things just don't run dry.
An easy way to keep that conversation going is to just follow up with a story based on
the question that you initially asked them.
Share your experience and your thoughts on what you asked them to share their thoughts
about.
Another thing you can do is to ask them deeper questions, so let's go back to the movie example.
Let's say you ask them what their most favorite movie of all time and they give you whatever
as their answer.
From there you can always ask them, "Well, what was the last movie you saw in theaters?"
or "What was the last thing you watched on Netflix?"
see how you're just breaking down that movie question into smaller more detailed questions?
That's a good way to learn more about them and in those detailed answers, you might come
across something that you really really connect with and that could be the perfect segway
into you sharing your thoughts.
Another thing that I don't really like that a lot of people do and this might just be
a me thing is that they ask permission to ask you a question or ask permission to tell
you a story.
So instead of saying something like hey, what are your thoughts on this?
They'll ask beforehand.
"Hey can I ask you a question?" which means I need to respond to that and then I need
to respond to their question and I feel like it just kills time.
It makes the conversation longer and it kind of just makes it a little bit more boring.
To me in a normal conversation, it displays a lack of confidence.
The only time I see it making sense to ask if you can ask them a question beforehand
is if it's something deeply personal that might actually trigger something or offend
them or hurt them in some way.
But other than that, if you're just trying to figure out what their favorite cereal is,
just ask the question directly.
Another thing that can make a texting conversation boring is just dropping way too many compliments.
Saying tons of things like "you're beautiful", "you're gorgeous", "you're amazing" over and
over and over can get kind of repetitive, even just seeing tons of those messages in
a row, it can just be a little overwhelming.
Compliments are a little bit like spices, you put a little bit in just to flavor the
meal but if you overspice your meal, you completely ruin it all together.
And finally the most important thing you need to do to not let that text conversation become
boring is to make that transition from texting to talking in person.
People will spend days and weeks and months just constantly texting, never giving that
person the hope that hey, I really like you, this is going well, let's meet up in person
and do something about it.
If you just stay in that texting stage, you're missing out on a whole world of new experiences
you can have with that person.
Conversations work entirely differently when it's face to face versus over text.
And you're just not really allowing you guys to flourish in that way.
So the key there is to take it offline when you feel like the time is right.
You can always say something like "You know, you're a really fun person to talk to.
Let's continue the conversation in person".
Now I know, a lot of you guys are nervous about taking it to the next step but I think
it's a crucial thing for you to do.
That's why I want to know, what do you guys think, what do you feel is holding you back
from moving the conversation from text to in person?
Leave your comments down below and we'll talk about it.
On that note guys thank you so much for watching, hit the thumbs up button if you enjoyed this
video and definitely check out the playlist over there on the side it's all my best videos
on texting.
If you really want to be a texting master that playlist is gonna get you up to speed
so, check it out and on that note, I'll catch you guys next week.
As always, love and peace.