- Doubt and fear will literally block you
from expressing yourself,
It will block you from killing confident,
it'll block you from having magnetic energy.
And in this video,
I'm gonna show you the five confidence secrets
to actually having magnetic energy
and transforming your confidence from the inside out.
Now, the first one,
and the first thing we need to talk about
is owning your own sense of self.
Now for this, remember this,
people feel what you feel about you.
So literally within our own bodies
how we are embodying ourself,
we're going out into the world
and we are connecting with other people.
If we feel like we are sacrificing ourselves
to make other people happy,
people will feel that coming off of us.
Now, this is an interesting perspective too,
because I've done this energy thing,
like there's this energy exercise
that I did when I was at a life transformation place
in Costa Rica, that I found very interesting.
Basically, what I'm gonna show here,
'cause I think a lot of you watching you might identify
as either empaths, maybe even people pleasers.
That was what I used to identify it with.
And what happens is, the more we seek,
and the more we lose our own sense of frame,
our own sense of self to make other people happy,
the more we are letting go of the energy within our body.
And it is actually deluding our own potency.
Now, in this exercise that I did in Costa Rica
there was a lady that did a,
she has, like a book on energy and stuff like that.
She had to us do this thing
where we projected energy at her inside the room.
We were projecting energy towards her
at the front of the room.
And she said she could literally feel it pushing her back.
But then what she said, she said,
instead, put the energy inside of your body,
bring the energy back to yourself.
And as we all started doing this,
she said she could feel the pull, pulling her.
It was almost like a magnet pulling her back.
Now the thing is, is when we are embodied,
when we are inside of our own frame,
when we are present,
we have magnetic energy.
But when we seek validation, approval
or something from other people,
they can feel that coming off of us,
and it actually repels them.
This is why codependency and neediness
is one of the most unattractive things,
because it is literally an energy of taking.
I also know people in my own life
that I've been friends with before that have that energy.
Now, I know because I used to have it as well
where I was wanting other people's approval and validation.
And I had to catch myself doing this.
And I had to start bringing the energy back.
Literally pull your energy back, pull it back,
and realize that when you pull your energy back,
you have much more magnetic energy,
and you are much more confident.
So really the key, and you know how they say this,
like in attracting love and stuff like this,
like one of the major keys is just owning yourself,
being who you are meant to be and owning it, and owning it.
That is one of the major keys of this.
Now, the word confidence comes from a word, a Latin root,
I think it's confidere or something like that,
but it means trust.
And what you're really learning how to do,
is how to trust your sense of self.
The challenge is that if we do not have a sense of self
because our sense of self is so expanded
that we need everybody to be and feel pleased and be happy.
Then we're not gonna feel confident
because there is no self, self confidence.
And maybe there's also an argument to be made
that there's confidence and spirit that flows through,
which is another conversation altogether as well.
This isn't just confidence in the ego,
it could be confidence in even the universe in reality.
But that's one of the major things about this, own it.
I think that's what this ascension
we're going through right now is all about.
It's about us tapping in and owning who we are,
giving ourselves permission to be ourselves.
And as we give ourself permission to be it.
It's like reality begins to change because remember,
the outer reality is just a reflection of the inner reality.
And when I started making videos on YouTube in 2017,
it changed my sense of identity.
I started to be confident through taking action.
And as I started to feel more confident,
my energy changed, my videos changed,
and more people, they could feel that off of me.
But remember, it is not,
What is it, seeing is believing?
See it to believe it.
It is actually more so, believe it to see it.
So you must believe in yourself,
but you must have this as a self
that you become present with,
and you start to not abandon yourself for others,
which is a common thing that some people do.
Now the second secret to owning your own confidence
and to having energy is security, security.
All right, by security, I mean
what you wanna do is you wanna turn your insecurities
to that of something you become comfortable with.
Feature your flaws.
What you think of as a flaw,
if you would just own it,
it would be a magical ability and power.
You know, there are many different ways of looking at this
but a lot of times people tend to go
to like, their physical traits.
You know, it could be a freckle,
there's a freckle or a mole right here.
And it's like, you might not own it
or feel self-conscious of it,
then you go out and you're like,
these people are looking at my mole.
Are people looking at my mole?
Oh my God, and then you're putting out an energy
that people are looking at my mole and they can feel that.
Remember, people feel what you feel.
But if you just owned your mole,
you would have other people feeling that energy off of you
and they would either accept it
or think it's the coolest thing ever.
So, it's about how you feel about it
but realize you can feature it.
Feature your flaws.
You will then turn them from insecurities
into something you feel very secure about.
And you can also use this for traits.
My best friend, Victor, he's more of an introvert,
I'm more of an extrovert.
So when we go out,
he used to feel super self-conscious about how quiet he was.
He would try to push himself to be like outgoing
but it just felt like a lot of energy for him.
So what he ended up doing,
he ended up just owning, being an introvert.
You wanna know what happened?
He became more extroverted.
First off, that's what happened, which is very interesting.
But secondly, he owned it
and he just accepted it within himself,
and then he stopped feeling anxiety.
He stopped caring and his whole entire energy changed.
So if you could consider yourself shy, an introvert.
If you have freckle,
if you're short,
if you're too tall,
whatever it is own, just own it.
And as you own it, you will feel differently.
And you could say bye to that old version of self, okay.
You could say, bye then.
Okay, you could say, bye then, bye then.
All right, now the third confidence secret
will completely transfer your life.
Transfer your life or transform your life is frame, frame.
Being in your own frame.
Now, in any relationship or dynamic,
what you will notice is that there are different people
that like, there's one person that always has the frame.
Now this doesn't mean you need to compete for it,
you need to assert your own frame
and never say no when given anything.
But what I'm saying about this is similar to the first one,
that people pleasing mentality, the impasse.
A lot of times we will move our own frame
to make other peoples happy
rather than being embodied inside of our own frame.
Our own frame is being in our body.
It's leading in our own life,
having a vision for something we wanna to create.
Now, when I started to make videos on YouTube
I started to have a stronger frame
and by frame, I mean physical body,
because I was working out.
I'm just kidding.
Not I don't mean that.
I mean frame, like for example,
let's say I'm making videos on YouTube every day
and working my nine to five job on women's shoes.
And I have friends that hit me up
and say, Hey, Aaron, come chill, come hang out
come do this, come do that, come smoke, whatever.
And I'd be like, back in the day,
I'd be like, oh my God, I felt so guilty,
My friends aren't gonna like anymore,
they aren't gonna accept me.
But instead what I did, is I realized
that I have this vision of this thing I'm creating,
I'm doing YouTube videos,
I'm so passionate about it.
So I had no problem saying no.
And I would say, no, I'm sorry
I'm actually focused on this vision.
And when I did that, guess what happened?
My confidence went up because I then had a vision
for something I'm creating,
and I didn't feel guilty and I was so excited
about what I was doing.
So one of the reasons I'm sharing this with you
is becoming confident, will require you to set boundaries.
And the boundaries will not only increase
your own sense of confidence,
you'll even look more valuable.
Because I'll tell you what,
the more you value your own time
the more you will say no,
I'll tell you that right now.
The busier I've gotten
the more I've had to say no to things.
And there's nothing wrong with that.
It's not a bad thing.
It's not a good thing, it just is.
You value your time more
to where you don't have time to do things
you used to be able to do.
So, know that a part of your journey
on this great awakening of your infinite self
is to become aware of your own frame
and your ability to say no.
No, I will not go 'cause I'm growing my own thing.
I do not feel guilty about it.
And as you learn this more and more you will notice
that your whole entire energy changes,
which leads me to one of the most important points here.
And that is integrity.
Going inwards, integrity is that
of being consistent with your word.
Now, your word is bond.
How many of you may have ever seen the book
or read the book, "The Four Agreements"?
Your word is bond, being in integrity with your word
is one of the main four agreements.
And with that, imagine you say and tell yourself,
I'm gonna go do this thing,
I'm gonna go to the gym tomorrow.
I haven't go to the gym in a while,
I'm gonna go to the gym tomorrow,
and then you don't go to the gym.
You've then broken your word.
Maybe you even told someone else you're going to the gym.
You've broken your word and not done it.
Guess what, you're not gonna trust yourself.
So part of integrity is being in alignment
with what you say you're gonna do.
Being in alignment with the values you prefer to have.
It is incredible when you realize that
how you do one thing is how you do everything.
When I was selling woman's shoes at Barney's
I would do this thing
where I would like wrap someone's shoes
in just such a eloquent way
where I would like just over deliver,
and I do one thing, how I do everything.
it was interesting how much they appreciated it.
And if you guys have ever gone to Japan,
you go to Japan and you order like something,
or you you might order, like, a croissant.
They will wrap that thing,
unlike anything you've ever seen anywhere else.
They have like these origami wrapping skills
that will just blow your mind.
But it's so thoughtful,
and it's like, it's just so,
and if you also, you walk around Japan,
here's a crazy thing.
They got no trash in Japan.
Not one, I don't, I can't even find a trash can.
And it's one of the cleanest cities you've ever been to.
And I'm like, how is this even possible?
Because they're in integrity
with their own sense of like what they're consuming.
And like, they're not putting it,
they're not like, here's like, oh,
supersize drink throw in the environment.
So the reason I share that is because it's like,
you can live in integrity with your own values
but also with your word,
how you do one thing is how you do everything.
Even your own a sense of environment.
If I show you my room, my house right now is pretty clean.
I keep my house clean,
because my external space is also a reflection
of my internal space and vice versa.
When I'm getting sloppy, my house will be looking sloppy.
All right, but integrity.
The more you do what you say you're gonna do,
you follow that up,
and the more, how you do one thing
is how you do everything,
the more confident you will feel.
I guarantee it.
So that's one other way.
You'll have magnetic energy too.
When you say you're gonna do something and you do it,
it's probably one of the most attractive things
you could do.
So start to own your own sense of what you say.
And don't say, here's another thing too.
One of the most things that are,
one of the most unattractive things
I had to catch myself doing this sometimes
is do not talk smack about other people.
Do not talk behind someone else's back,
your words, you know, we may not see it
but our words, it's energy.
And the words we say are going out into the world
and it is meeting the person you're talking smack about.
And they're feeling that.
Remember, what you put out is what you get back.
So the more you talk smack about someone else
the more there's someone else
maybe a completely different person
talking a smack about you
because that's the energy that's being put out.
Remember, your energy field goes around your body
and other people in our collective reality
or feeling that and respond would in that way.
So one of the most attractive things you do
is not talk smack about people.
If anything, talk good, send them good positive thoughts.
It's attractive for you to talk good about someone,
but when you're getting angry about something
and there's just something not working out in your reality,
it's not attractive.
Now, the fifth confidence secret
that's completely transformed my life
is learning a combination of two things.
One how to open up my own heart.
The more I opened up my own heart, the more confident I was
because then I've allowed spirit to flow through.
I know it sounds kind of esoteric,
but I had to consciously make the choice to open my heart.
Because for a long time, I think I had this heart walls
around myself that kept me safe
from intimacy, emotional availability, stuff like that.
And there was a defining moment about a year ago
where I just decided I'm gonna open up my heart.
I'm gonna stop judging people,
I'm going to start feeling connected.
And really, I'm opening up my heart to new possibilities,
to a new way of being.
And what I would do is I put myself out there more.
I would talk and share, get vulnerable,
wear my heart on my sleeve in a way.
But as I did that, I started to feel way more confident
because my heart was open.
I was making a conscious choice to open my heart.
And the thing is,
as you can understand intellectually
some of these confident secrets,
but when you're feeling from your heart,
your heart energy, that's being emanated out,
people can feel that.
The electro magnetic energy of your heart
goes out thousands of times more than your head.
It's like, literally,
your head goes a couple feet out your body.
Maybe your heart goes much more.
And people feel that.
Some people say BDE Big Dick Energy right?
What about BHE?
All you spiritual people watching right now,
let's just soak in the BHE
the Big Heart Energy.
Oh my God, this is so good.
But really, energy goes out way more than your Dick.
If you guy or girl, I mean, I'm just saying,
or non-binary.
Whatever you are, realize your heart energy,
It's gonna be felt more than anything else, okay.
So, one of the keys to this
as well to confidence in general
is realizing, a lot of us have this inner child inside of us
that doesn't feel confident
because we didn't feel seen heard, understood,
or validated as kids.
So one of the most powerful things you can do
is to heal your own inner child.
And one of the most powerful meditations ever made
is on inner child healing,
where we energetically go to Kauai, Hawaii
and we hear our inner child.
And what you could do
is listen to this meditation for 21 days,
go to aarondoughty.com/child to check that out.
And then also there is a video on having,
I go in detail, it's like a 40 minute episode of me talking
about all of this stuff in a deeper way.
It's confident secrets that making magnetic AF,
you can check this video out right here and watch it.
It's so good.
People feel what you feel about you.
The energy inside of our bodies are contagious.
And based on how we feel about ourselves
that energy is being emanated out and other people are...