Oh God!
No, no. My god, no. This is hostility.
I only wrote the one chapter.
Well, that's a hell of a chapter.
Did you use really big font?
Hello?
Mr Duchovny?
Hello?
David?
Hello?
What the actual fuck?
Hey.
Hi. Hi!
I didn't know anybody was here.
Ji-Yoon?
Yeah.
The… the door was open.
You always leave your door open?
Never had a problem before.
That's why I love it here.
Nobody bothers you.
Oh God!
You okay?
Yeah. Sorry, for a second, I thought you were naked.
Interesting.
For the distinguished lectureship,
I was thinking of presenting my Yale dissertation.
"The Schizophrenic Critique of Pure Reason
in Beckett's Early Novels".
I only wrote the one chapter.
Well, that's a hell of a chapter.
Did you use really big font?
Nope.
Yeah, I got sidetracked for a few decades,
but I've been thinking about finishing it,
you know, and filing for my PhD.
Dr David Duchovny.
Maybe too much alliteration.
Do you think it's unfair
for people to start thinking of me as Dr David Duchovny
after thinking of me as
just David Duchovny for so many years?
Anyway, take a gander.
I reread it last night. It's… it's pretty good.
Press-ient even.
Press-ient, really?
I think it's pronounced prescient,
unless we're English.
Aren't we speaking English?
Okay, maybe you chose the wrong department.
Maybe you're better suited for the sch-iences.
I don't say that because you're Asian.
I mean, I don't even know that you are Asian.
And I don't see colour…
or ethnicity or even faces…
at this point, I just see…
vibe and aura, and yours is lovely.
I'm going to make a sch-moothie.
-Like a sch-moothie? -No, thank you.
Have you been to the farmers' market here?
No.
Ah, I used to think this town was devoid of culture,
but I stand corrected.
I mean, look at that carrot.
Anyway, pretend I'm not here.
I can't just catch you up with a quick tutorial.
Why not?
Because that's an insane request.
This is over 30 years old.
A lot has happened in the last 30 years.
Like what?
Like affect theory, ecocriticism,
digital humanities, new materialism,
book history,
gender studies and critical race theory.
When did you last pick up an academic journal?
Well, I've been on tour with my band.
-So… -It shows.
And you know what else?
The fact that you're using this honour from Pembroke
to dust off your dissertation
and go back and get your PhD,
it's… it's… it's self-serving.
Whoa, is this hostility
because Pembroke is like this lower-tier Ivy
and I went to Princeton?
-No! -And Yale?
No, no. My God, no. This is hostility
because I promised this lectureship
to someone who deserves it.
The purpose of the talk is to present
cutting-edge scholarship.
This reads like it's out of the mid-80s.
I mean, like the…
The discipline has moved forward and…
you're still stuck back in a different era.
I just need a minute.
-Here, can I make a-- -No!
Your maps and geography
When I come back If I come back
I swear that I'll be simpler
When I come back If I come back
I'll have a mind of winter
Only song I've ever heard quote Wallace Stevens.
Fuck, I hope so.
You have a good voice.
Was there someone else before me?
A celebrity author?
Did Pembroke offer this position
to someone else first?
It's all right, I can take it.
There was talk of James Franco a while back.
Well, he got his PhD from Yale.
-Did he? He got it? -Yeah. He did.
He did.
They might have invited Ethan Hawke,
but he was shooting in Bulgaria.
What was he shooting?
-Pardon me? -In Bulgaria?
Well, a movie or a TV series?
Well, I don't know what he was shooting.
There's a lot of shooting in Bulgaria.
Okay.
Look, so…
I did all that work at Yale on Beckett.
Right? But I figured I'll just stick with that
and then… Let's take a swim.
Oh, I don't have a bathing suit.
Well, you can borrow one.
Here, borrow this one.
Who's… Who wore that?
That's mine. It's a speed suit.
I wear it when I wanna swim for time.
Because skin's a drag, because of hair.
You can't teach Beckett for the rest of the semester.
Why not? You got Murphy, Malloy, Malone Dies.
The students bought the other books.
So I'll reimburse them.
I'm a grossly overpaid actor-slash-musician
slash-novelist and they're students,
burdened with student debt.
-I will unburden them. -I mean…
The syllabus is a contract You can't just change--
Let's go for a swim.
You know what? Teaching is not a pastime,
it's a profession.
If you really want to make a contribution to the field,
tell them you've changed your mind
give them a cheque to endow a chair in your name,
and I'll get you an honorary doctorate.
The David Duchovny Chair in English Studies?
The Dr David Duchovny Chair in English Studies.